SUBSCRIBE to Capitol Fax      Advertise Here      Mobile Version     Exclusive Subscriber Content     Updated Posts    Contact
CapitolFax.com
To subscribe to Capitol Fax, click here.
TIme waster

Tuesday, Nov 30, 2004

McSweeney’s New Food page is a culinary and literary delight.

Swiss Chard

Submitted by Eric Smith

I hate you Swiss chard. Oh, how I hate you. I have hated you ever since I figured out why dumpsters smell like dumpsters. It’s because of you. I always thought they took on that characteristic stench because long years of bad garbage odors combined together in an unholy stew that for some reason always smelled the same. Kind of like how mixing lots of different paint colors always gives you brown. But no, it turns out that they smell exactly like you did two days after I brought you home from the grocery store. So it was you all along. Screw you, Swiss chard. [Snip]

The Litchi

Submitted by Ellia Bisker

If you’ve ever idly wondered what it might be like to eat a human eyeball, you might want to consider the litchi as a delicious (and more socially appropriate) alternative. Here is how to eat a litchi. Stick your thumbnail into the base of the stem and pull back slightly until the stem releases, then peel away the papery skin in a thin spiral strip. About this skin: it is covered with small rosy hexagonal scales, like the drupelets of a raspberry with some reptile in its family tree. You will expose a slippery globe of translucent white flesh about the size of a pingpong ball. Stop peeling about halfway down, because here comes the part you have been waiting for: press your lips to the perfectly smooth fruit, apply a little suction, and with a wet, satisfying plop, it will suddenly pop into your mouth, luscious, fragrant as nectar. Imagine that it’s the eye of your lover, or your nemesis. It’s just that good.

- Posted by Rich Miller        


1 Comment
  1. - Pat Collins - Wednesday, Dec 1, 04 @ 7:28 am:

    Don’t dump on the Lychee! There is nothing better on a hot humid day in Asia than a nice bunch of lychee to cool you down.

    Of course, it’s quite sticky, you’ll want to have a good supply of wipes. But they are very yummy.


Sorry, comments for this post are now closed.


* Reader comments closed for the weekend
* *** UPDATED x1 *** A few, sparse deets about the Obama visit
* Rauner now says he supports opening the State Museum
* Rahm fires back, and a trip down memory lane
* Red meat for the masses
* *** UPDATED x2 - A clue? - Rauner denies involvement *** AFSCME warns of "phony poll"
* "Not even cash-strapped Puerto Rico"
* Jesse White, many others blast Dunkin, endorse Stratton
* Question of the day
* SUBSCRIBERS ONLY - MJM's new ad, ILGOP's new buy
* Two completely different takes on the Ferro situation
* Because... Madigan!
* Rate the new ad for Rep. Avery Bourne
* SUBSCRIBERS ONLY - Supplement to today’s edition
* Caption contest!
* SUBSCRIBERS ONLY - Today's edition of Capitol Fax (use all CAPS in password)
* Yesterday's blog posts

Support CapitolFax.com
Visit our advertisers...

...............

...............

...............

...............

...............

...............


Search This Blog...

Search the 98th General Assembly By Bill Number
(example: HB0001)

Search the 98th General Assembly By Keyword

  
* OPPO F1 Review: Decent? Yes. Expert? No. (Video)
* VRS Design cases offer peek at Samsung Galaxy S7 and Galaxy S7 Edge
* How to stream Super Bowl 50 from your phone, tablet, or media player
* LiveLike’s VR Spectator App Wins The 1st And Future Bringing Home The Game Category
* [Deal] T-Mobile offers customers an Alcatel OneTouch Pixi 7 basically for free
* Better call quality is coming to Hangouts
* Power tools: Apps that give your battery more juice

* ALL TIME SSS POST AND REC TOTALS
* White Sox Minor Leaguer Shearrow suspended
* Spring not far away as truck heads to Arizona
* This week in White Sox: Sun sets on Andre Ethier rumor
* Did July change Chicago's offseason?
* White Sox trade rumors: Low, sustained heat around Andre Ethier
* Rumor with a view: Why not chase Puig?

...............


Main Menu
Home
Illinois
YouTube
Pundit rankings
Obama
Subscriber Content
Durbin
Burris
Blagojevich Trial
Advertising
Updated Posts
Polls

Archives
February 2016
January 2016
December 2015
November 2015
October 2015
September 2015
August 2015
July 2015
June 2015
May 2015
April 2015
March 2015
February 2015
January 2015
December 2014
November 2014
October 2014
September 2014
August 2014
July 2014
June 2014
May 2014
April 2014
March 2014
February 2014
January 2014
December 2013
November 2013
October 2013
September 2013
August 2013
July 2013
June 2013
May 2013
April 2013
March 2013
February 2013
January 2013
December 2012
November 2012
October 2012
September 2012
August 2012
July 2012
June 2012
May 2012
April 2012
March 2012
February 2012
January 2012
December 2011
November 2011
October 2011
September 2011
August 2011
July 2011
June 2011
May 2011
April 2011
March 2011
February 2011
January 2011
December 2010
November 2010
October 2010
September 2010
August 2010
July 2010
June 2010
May 2010
April 2010
March 2010
February 2010
January 2010
December 2009
November 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
June 2009
May 2009
April 2009
March 2009
February 2009
January 2009
December 2008
November 2008
October 2008
September 2008
August 2008
July 2008
June 2008
May 2008
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004

Blog*Spot Archives
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005

Syndication

RSS Feed 2.0
Comments RSS 2.0
WordPress

Loading


* Rauner: State Museum can reopen, needs partner .....
* Taking orders from Obama, Rauner - Belleville N.....
* Governor Signs Executive Order Directing Illino.....


* Police: Rockford's violent crimes surged 24 percent in 2015
* Names released of 6 relatives found dead in Chicago home
* 3 held in alleged fake kidnapping scheme in Chicago suburb
* Lake County offering mental health training to officers
* U of I reports record number of freshman applications
* Chicago FBI: 'Pinball Bandit' suspected in 5 bank robberies
* Amtrak, Illinois reach deal to maintain instate service
* New commemorative quarter features Shawnee National Forest
* Chicago Archdiocese to close parishes due to priest shortage
* Rauner: Illinois State Museum may open with its own funding

* Statehouse Insider: Three days until President Obama turns Illinois around
* Gaming Board seeks to revoke license of terminal operator
* Illinois Gaming Board seeks to revoke license of terminal operator
* Springfield awaits details on President Obama's visit on Wednesday
* Rauner alters bill that would reopen Illinois State Museum, includes admission fee directive
* IDOT, Amtrak reach agreement to maintain train service
* Rauner touts government consolidation legislation
* State, federal inspectors do flood damage assessments in Kincaid
* Rauner administration, AFSCME continue war of words over contract talks
* Rally to push for budget planned at Eastern Illinois

* Too bad for Boeing—but this Rolling Meadows plant will get boost from Air Force bomber
* Small airlines to O'Hare brass: What about us?
* Why 'distressed' homes are so hot today
* What's the hottest job in Chicago tech today?
* Chicago teachers' rejection of deal is bad for all


* THE WATCHDOGS: Rauner still keeping secrets
* Wheaton College to ‘part ways’ with hijab-wearing professor
* Blackhawks trounce Stars to extend Central Division lead
* Sunday Sitdown with sociologist Michael Maly on whites and Chicago
* THE WATCHDOGS: Part-time City Council watchdog made nearly $800,000 in 4 years
* Anisimov leads another explosive period against the Stars
* Mitchell: For sake of poor, minority kids, change needed at CPS
* BGA Public Eye: State OKs gambling malls while ripping ‘backdoor casinos’
* Blackhawks shoot out to an early lead over Dallas
* Brown: Under the wire in Uptown


* Families stunned by shooting deaths of two teens, urge public's help
* Third person charged in 2014 home invasion that left 2 dead
* Wheaton College reverses efforts to fire professor, but she won't return to teach
* Woman arrested at Near North Dunkin' Donuts is charged in Uptown slaying
* Real estate developer John Tishman, man behind World Trade Center, John Hancock Center, dies at age 90
* Cop who shot Quintonio LeGrier and neighbor sues teen's estate, claiming trauma 
* $2 million bail set for man accused of stabbing young relative in head
* Health worker charged with stealing from elderly person she cared for
* Gage Park victims' identities officially released by medical examiner
* Man charged in armed robbery of cab driver in Elgin


* OUR VIEW: U.S. Senate candidates should debate outside Chicago
* Bernard Schoenburg: Poe backs Benton over McCann in 50th
* Austin Berg: Illinois manufacturers need bold action from Springfield
* Statehouse Insider: Three days until President Obama turns Illinois around
* Gaming Board seeks to revoke license of terminal operator
* Illinois Gaming Board seeks to revoke license of terminal operator
* Kevin Borgia: Wind energy a low-cost, reliable part of Illinois’s electricity mix
* Charles Krauthammer: The 'establishment' nonsense
* Springfield awaits details on President Obama's visit on Wednesday
* Rauner alters bill that would reopen Illinois State Museum, includes admission fee directive


* UI roundup: Eggleston paces men's gymnasts
* Illini legends, lists and lore: Tricia Taliaferro
* HS Boy's Basketball: Centennial vs Washington
* Class 2A Wrestling Regionals
* Tiley: No contact with the UI about AD opening
* Urbana man arrested for alleged cocaine sale
* 0206 Laterance Creighton
* Pedestrian critically injured in Paxton
* Finke, Nunn looking good for Iowa
* Illini Preview: Recovery complete from triple OT win


* Wheaton College, professor reach deal; she will leave
* Officials: Man seriously injured by falling tree in McHenry
* Five American Airlines gates to be added at O'Hare
* Kindred-spirit QBs Favre, Stabler voted into Hall of Fame
* Buffalo Grove High team wins third state cheer title in 4 years

* House lawmakers overcome hurdle on key tra...
* Rodney Davis talks funding with Bloomingto...
* The agency that fought Illiana gets a new ...
* Rep. Dold takes educational cruise down Ch...
* Lawmakers decry high turnover rate of VA h...
* CBD Oil, and politics
* Simon considering state Senate bid
* Killer Congressman Tom MacArthur trying to...
* Shutdown? State may not notice
* Rep. Bob Dold

* President Obama goes to Springfield to add......
* Report: Obama and Other Gun Control Propon......

* Sen. Kirk Introduces Bill to Ensure Retire......

* Random thoughts. Union leadership conspiracy theories.
* Art + Activism.
* Art and Activism.
* "Big Game" Happenings
* Thorner: Demand lawmakers enact a permanent Smart Meter opt out for Illinoisans
* Di Leo: Dwindling Jobs...and Attacking the Producers
* Happy 105th Birthday, Mr. Reagan!
* Rauner: State can save $500M on purchases
* Cook County Commissioner Morrison: Oppose firearm liability insurance proposal
* Wilson Men's Club Hotel Is For Sale, And Oak Park Columnist Is On The Case


* Emergency Management Officials, National Weather Service Encourage Winter Preparedness - November is Winter Weather Preparedness Month in Illinois
* Keep Your Family Safe This Winter - November through February are leading months for carbon monoxide related incidents
* Governor Takes Bill Action
* Illinois Department of Labor Director Hugo Chaviano Awards Governor’s Award for Contributions in Health and Safety to the Illinois Refining Division of Marathon Petroleum Company LP
* State Regulator Elected Treasurer of Interstate Medical Licensure Compact




Hosted by MCS SUBSCRIBE to Capitol Fax Advertise Here Mobile Version Contact Rich Miller