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* It was tough making a decision about who won yesterday’s caption contest. I chuckled all afternoon…
But since a prize is involved, I’m forced to make a decision.
* Fifth runner-up goes to Anonymiss…
“Great, now we don’t match. You said to wear blue. I thought you meant eyeshadow. Stop laughing, this isn’t funny.”
I loved that entry, but I already owe her drinks, so I didn’t want to add to my debt.
* Our fourth runner-up is Rep. John Fritchey for this golden nugget…
“I told her those weren’t regular brownies,” chuckled Sen. Brady to Sen. Rutherford as JBT tries to win a staring contest against a microphone.
I almost awarded the top prize to Fritchey, but there’s no way we could limit this to a one-hour cocktail time, so he’s a no-go.
* Third runner-up is from Don’t Worry, Be Happy…
Bill Brady and Dan Rutherford laugh as Rich Miller’s head explodes due to Judy Baar Topinka’s psychic onslaught. Asked about the incident later, Topinka shrugged and said “well, he used an unflattering picture of me on his blog, so he had it coming.”
Yes, I probably did.
* Lefty Lefty is our second runner-up for most creative use of current pop culture…
At the 2040 Reunion of the Juggalos, Tila Tequila recounts her pummeling with food and beer bottles at the 2010 Gathering while Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope laugh it up. The crowd threw their dentures and Metamucil but much of it didn’t reach the stage.
* First runner-up goes to Oswego Willy, our resident Jason Plummer hater…
Plummer: “Before I begin … Whoever has a van, license plate ‘ABC 123′ with Judy Topinka signs all over it … The wiffle ball that broke your winshield is mine, sorry about that.”
He might’ve won had it not been for the misspellings. Then again, those may have been intentionally ironic. We’ll never know.
* Top prize and a one-hour cocktail party goes to Way Way Down Here. I’m pretty sure he’s referring to David Miller, Topinka’s Democratic opponent. At least, I hope so…
JBT: Get up Miller and I’ll give you another one just like it.
BB: Yeah get up.
DR: Yeah another one.
WWDH should use the “Contact Me” button so we can set up a time and place. Congratulations. And thanks much to everyone for playing. We had over 200 comments, which was pretty amazing.
* How about we try another one? Potential mayoral candidate Sheriff Tom Dart loves him some puppies…
posted by Rich Miller
Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:22 pm
Sorry, comments are closed at this time.
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These puppies were being sold on Craigslist..
Comment by OneMan Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:24 pm
For each day Craigslist does not get rid of it’s adult services section I turn over a puppy to Bill Brady
Comment by OneMan Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:26 pm
Justice for some, Deville style fur cotas for all!
Comment by Ghost Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:31 pm
I would like to introduce my campaign team in my bid to become the next mayor of Chicago.
Comment by Montrose Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:33 pm
Now that’s what I call a cozy dog!
Comment by George Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:33 pm
Being mayor might be ruff.
Comment by Davey Boy Smithe Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:33 pm
I was investinagting a craigs list ad for “plaything” and “loving” and found these.
Comment by Ghost Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:33 pm
” Chicago has gone to the dogs?” says Mayoral Candidate Tom Dart,”These puppies are registered voters- just check the voter file….”
Comment by Inishmean Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:34 pm
My office will not evict Mr. Ruffles and JuJu Bear from their dog house because of the owner’s foreclosure.
Comment by Montrose Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:37 pm
“I’d love to stay and chat with all of you reporters, but I need to get to a fundraiser Mike Vick is throwing for me.”
Comment by The End Is Near Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:37 pm
“These two should be just enough to finish my coat.”
Comment by Duckguy Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:38 pm
I’m gonna raise a little extra cash for the campaign doing consulting for Brady.
Comment by been there Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:40 pm
Turner & Hooch II
Comment by Montrose Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:42 pm
These adorable puppies were evicted from their homes. If I’m elected Mayor no puppy will be homeless.
Comment by Bonsaso Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:43 pm
“And if I’m elected Mayor, every Chicago household will receive a free puppy.”
Rich, does being third runner-up mean that I get to fill in if the winner and first and second runners-up are unable to fulfill their obligations as Caption Contest Winner? Oh well, at least I beat Fritchey.
Comment by Don't Worry, Be Happy Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:43 pm
I’m pretty sure the stain on the front of my shirt is from when the southside dog I had for lunch earlier dripped—-pretty sure.
Comment by Responsa Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:45 pm
DWBH, I hadn’t thought of that, but yes.
Comment by Rich Miller Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:47 pm
And after these guys help Pat Quinn finish off Brady, I’m going to use their daddy on Rahm.
Comment by Anonymous Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:48 pm
I’m rover this campaign already.
Comment by CLJ Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:49 pm
“I love puppies and oppose mass euthanization, unlike a certain gubernatorial candidate.”
Comment by Reformer Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:49 pm
“George, I am going to love him and feed him and pet him…”
Comment by A.B. Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:50 pm
DWBH, what a strange question. You aren’t planning any, like, ACCIDENTS for yesterday’s higher winners are you?
Comment by Responsa Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:52 pm
I have this warm spot in my heart for this great city….wait a minute it’s running down my chest into my waistband…….
Comment by Todd Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:54 pm
DWBH, trust me, drinking with Rich Miller is certainly not worth jail time.
Comment by Raising Kane Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:55 pm
Too funny, Responsa. And kinda ironic since I gave serious thought to posting this pic instead. lol
Comment by Rich Miller Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:55 pm
Dart: “Let me introduce my ‘Dart for Mayor’ campaign team. This is Spot, my campaign manager and that is Tanner, my campaign spokesdog.
Reporter: “Ah, Sheriff Dart? You realize those are puppies right?”
Dart: “Of course I do, I need a gimmick against that Rahmbo.
Reporter: “Do you really think this will work?”
Dart: “Sure. I’ll take puppies against Obama’s sinking poll numbers any day. Who doesn’t love puppies?”
Comment by Rep. Ed Sulllivan Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:58 pm
Dart: Look mommy a puppy you never let me have!!!!
Comment by dumb ol' country boy Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 1:58 pm
Only 99 more of these and I’ll have a new coat.
Comment by Mayorella de Ville Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:00 pm
How many times I have to tell you, i want my eyebrows to look like this!!!!
Comment by dumb ol' country boy Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:01 pm
Tom Dart, evaluating a potential mayoral candidacy, practices distracting his constituency from increasing crime and budget cuts.
Comment by Tim Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:05 pm
Under my leadership, Chicago will be the most adorable city in the world!
Comment by Montrose Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:05 pm
Tom Dart, Always barking for votes anywhere he can find them
Comment by Rahm's Parking Meter Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:06 pm
Tom: We had to take these away from Plummer because he was too rough with them.
Jason: I just like feelin’ soft things. I only bounced his head a little bit when he nipped at me.
Brady: Don’t worry Jason, after I gas all of them together you can do all the pettin’ you want.
Comment by Small Town Liberal Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:07 pm
Upon learning that Bill Brady had become the next Governor of Illinois, Sheriff Tom Dart attempts to single-handedly save every puppy across the state.
Comment by Anonymiss Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:09 pm
All we have to do is get these pups some cigars and teach them how to play cards - everyone will buy the picture!
Comment by Stones Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:12 pm
DWBH - be careful, the last person that beat me was Quigley and now he has to sleep on an air mattress in his office
Comment by Rep. John Fritchey Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:13 pm
Sheriff Tom Dart announcing his new puppy-training program for low risk offenders at Cook County Jail. As a bonus, the proceeds of the program will be used as fertilizer for the Sheriff’s jail garden program.
Comment by Anonymous Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:15 pm
Dart as Mayor will love puppies of all types!
Comment by Levois Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:16 pm
“What the Johns don’t realize is that these puppies aren’t just willing participants. They are forced into pet-hood by so-called owners who enslave the puppies and “train” them by forcing them to wear dog collars and in some cases, even erect electric fences.”
Comment by Siriusly Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:17 pm
Responsa - it really was an innocent question. I mean, it just seems likes these contest winners keep having nude photos turn up on the internet that disqualify them, so you never know when the top slot might unexpectedly open up.
Kane - actually, I’d say it is worth the risk.
Rep. Fritchey - ok, you got me. I’m out of snappy comebacks.
Comment by Don't Worry, Be Happy Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:22 pm
“Instead of running for Mayor of Chicago, I have decided to throw my hat into the ring for Dogcatcher of Cook County because it is one of the limited number of political offices where you can positively impact people’s and animals’ lives.”
Comment by Betsy Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:25 pm
I’ll beat you Rahm Emanuel, me and my little dog too!
Comment by Amalia Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:28 pm
It is with a heavy heart that I stand here today. I was out drinking with Rich Miller last night, I won some caption contest, and I woke up this morning and found these puppies all over my house. I have no idea how they got there. I’d like to apologize to my friends, my family and the puppy community for any embarassment.
Comment by dc Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:33 pm
Tom Dart recruits two campaign advisors away from Pat Quinn’s gubernatorial campaign team.
Comment by CLJ Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:34 pm
“What? You mean trying to throw these across the Chicago river is a bad idea?”
Comment by Pat collins Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:40 pm
I’d like to introduce you to my honorary campaign chairs, “Little Ritchie and his brother Billie.”
Comment by culatr Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:53 pm
I’am Da Mayor or the puppies get it! See?
Comment by Demo Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:54 pm
“As part of his continuing efforts to use innovative approaches to law enforcement, Sheriff Tom Dart and an assistant hold 2 of the puppies that will replace guns in the holsters of the department’s deputies. ‘Guns make perps nervous. Puppies make them smile,” he said at the event.”
I will also mention that I will fulfill my obligation as second runner-up should the burden fall to me. We can meet at the Cork & Kerry, Rich!
Comment by Lefty Lefty Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:58 pm
Tom Dart appears at a press conference with representatives of the Chicago Republican Party.
Comment by Pingu Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:59 pm
I was just there last week, LL. Let’s try next door.
Comment by Rich Miller Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 2:59 pm
Hold the a-paws. I may not be an underdog in this race, but I’m going to sniff every hydrant for you vote(s). Have your pets spayed or neutered, I’m out for the weekend!
Comment by Davey Boy Smithe Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:03 pm
If you don’t vote for me, and vote for my opponent, you are voting against puppies.
Comment by Just Saying Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:04 pm
What happens next.
Comment by Rich Miller Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:07 pm
Thanks for the “props” Rich, about 95 percent of the misspelling are for irony’s sake - the other SIX percent is just being a dope.
Comment by Oswego Willy Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:12 pm
Rich,
Why the deletion?
Comment by unclesam Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:12 pm
“Profanity is absolutely not acceptable in any form.”
Comment by Rich Miller Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:14 pm
Despite rumors, no puppies were harmed making any of my hairpieces.
Comment by Walter Sobchak Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:16 pm
Then I shall be more careful
Comment by unclesam Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:29 pm
When asked how he could be considered independent despite his long years in Springfield, Dart responded: “Hey look, a puppy!”
Comment by Skeeter Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:35 pm
I fold to OneMan with his:
For each day Craigslist does not get rid of it’s adult services section I turn over a puppy to Bill Brady.
But there really should be some kind of penalty for:
Being mayor might be ruff.
lol
Comment by just sayin' Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:52 pm
“Hey Ritchie, either you step aside or I start killing puppies, capiche?”
Comment by We Todd Did Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 3:58 pm
A mayoral underdog unveils his new mascots.
Comment by Jake from Elwood Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:06 pm
Dyslexic Dart argues for more God at City Hall.
Comment by 13 Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:20 pm
Yes, they are registered voters, but they vote absentee.
or
Who let the Dart out? Who? Who?
Comment by springfieldian Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:23 pm
Chicagoans love dogs. I am holding a dog. Chicagoans love Tom Dart for Mayor.
Comment by Vote Quimby! Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:26 pm
VQ wins.
Comment by Rich Miller Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:40 pm
“Man, I must be out of shape - I’ve only held this tiny pup for 30 seconds, and I’m pooped!”
Comment by aufjunk Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:43 pm
TD: Man, these little guys are harder to pin down than a theme to a Quinn speech. How in the world does Brady get all of them to fit in that box?
Comment by Long Time Listener, First Time Caller Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:44 pm
Saved from Brady.
Comment by Third Generation Chicago Native Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 4:45 pm
And remember, folks: have all your politicians spayed or neutered!
Comment by Bob Barker Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 6:32 pm
Look at all the puppies I saved from Bill Brady’s oven!
Comment by The Truth Friday, Sep 10, 10 @ 10:48 pm