Chance the Snapper in custody
Tuesday, Jul 16, 2019 - Posted by Rich Miller
* Always hire a professional…
CITY OFFICIALS TO PROVIDE DETAILS ON THE HUMANE CAPTURE OF THE ALLIGATOR IN HUMBOLDT PARK TODAY AT 10:00 A.M.
WHO: Leadership from Chicago Animal Care and Control, and the Chicago Park District
WHAT: Officials will provide details about the safe and humane capture overnight of the alligator spotted in the Humboldt Park Lagoon last week.
WHERE: HUMBOLDT PARK BOATHOUSE, 1301 N. Humboldt Blvd. Chicago
WHEN: TODAY, 10:00 a.m.
WHY: The Humboldt Park alligator has captured the imaginations of the entire City of Chicago and beyond and has united residents who have been following this story for the last week. The City’s top priority has been to keep residents and park patrons safe while facilitating the safe and humane capture of the alligator. Officials will inform residents about the plan that led to his successful capture and the next steps for him.
The alligator will be in attendance.
Kind Regards,
Jenny Schlueter
Assistant to the Director
Chicago Animal Care and Control
* I thought he’d be bigger…
…Adding… Florida man…
- Anon - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:22 am:
Ouch for Alligator Bob… 1 day on the job and a pro gets it..
- Caption - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:23 am:
Ha ha. I ate your Squeezy the Pension Python
- pool boy - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:24 am:
Rumor has it Oswego Willy is going to adopt him.
- Joey Twoshoes - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:25 am:
Where’s his 3 hat?
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:26 am:
===Rumor has it … is going to adopt him.===
Did *I* make inquiries to that effect?
Maybe.
We’d all like privacy at this very difficult time.
- Ron Burgundy - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:27 am:
At least Alligator Bob got to meet Chicago Party Aunt before he was replaced.
- Stormfield - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:27 am:
“The alligator will be in attendance” is a cinch to be one of my favorite press release lines of 2019.
- Skeptic - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:29 am:
Take a bite out of crime.
- Fairbanks - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:29 am:
Well, hatchachachacha…
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:29 am:
I was always #TeamAlligatorBob.
But now?
“Thoughts and Prayers” for #AlligatorBob.
The Florida gator wrangler… took our gator away, and took your glory with him.
Bob, We Hardly Knew Ye.
- LoyalVirus - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:30 am:
Rich, wouldn’t have taken you for a size queen. But, same - this lil guy would only have a 2 on his hat…
- bhartbanjo - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:30 am:
I also thought he would be bigger, but I didn’t expect the nice smile.
- JJJJJJJJJJJ - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:31 am:
Not a great look for Alligator Bob.
- Michelle Flaherty - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:32 am:
Thus ends the pilot episode of Bay Watch - Humboldt Park
- ChicagoVinny - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:32 am:
Florida Man had to travel to Chicago to get a good headline.
- Buford - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:34 am:
Free Chance the Snapper!
What will be his fate? Life at a zoo?
- Ex ASA - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:36 am:
Good news is that Kim Foxx will release him by noon
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:36 am:
Later Gator!
Sneed heard that the ageless and priceless Humboldt Park gator, aptly named Chance the Snapper, was caught in the wee hours of the morning by a Florida gator wrangler
Upshot - There’s no Chance there will be a snapping incident.
Downshot - Chicago’s own “Alligator” Bob will be back on rodent patrol before you can say Crocodile tears.
Backshot - Rumor is Chance the Snapper is heading to Florida like many Chicago retirees.
Buckshot - No alligator was harmed during its capture.
Before Chance the Snapper is finally relocated, he (or she) will be having lunch with the formerly powerful Committee Chairman Ed Burke and his powerful wife Justice Anne Burke and all three are over the moon about the eat and great.
Natch.
- Notso honest Abe - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:40 am:
Maybe we should take him to live in one of the fountains at the state Capitol building in Springfield. We could fund his upkeep with tourism fund.
Springfield needs a draw besides the snakelike politicians that come through there each spring
- Nick Name - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:41 am:
Florida man FTW(banned punctuation)
- efudd - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:42 am:
Delicious with a little cocktail sauce…
- Birds on the bat - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:43 am:
JB gonna be walking in state fair parade with a nice new pair of alligator boots.
- JS Mill - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:45 am:
Is Alligator Bob related to Arizona Bob? Might explain some things.
#FreeChancetheSnapper.
- FormerParatrooper - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:46 am:
That gator has a smile like he knows something.
- Whatever - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:47 am:
==I thought he’d be bigger…==
He really is much bigger when you’re in the water next to him.
- Wylie Coyote - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:47 am:
Hell, he still has his baby teeth. Nice tail, though.
- A Jack - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:51 am:
One more reason to stay in Illinois: The lack of experience Illinoisans have with alligators. We may have lousy winters, but we have very few creatures that might consider you as dinner.
- Sulla - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:52 am:
“Ha ha. I ate your Squeezy the Pension Python”
I totally read that in Tom Servo’s voice.
- Henry Francis - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:53 am:
==* I thought he’d be bigger…==
That’s why I never wanted it found. It would be so much better if it was left to everyone’s imagination. This alligator unified the entire city, everyone knew about it, and it was fun.
- Wensicia - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 9:57 am:
Rumor is a gag order is in effect, Chance will not be allowed to open his mouth at the press conference.
- Michelle Flaherty - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:01 am:
I haven’t been this excited about something being apprehended by authorities since Dec. 9, 2008.
- lakeside - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:01 am:
Jenny Schlueter is making the most of this, and I am very into it. ‘The alligator will be in attendance.’ Excellent content.
- Cubs in '16 - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:03 am:
“The alligator will be in attendance.”
Alligator later cancels citing a scheduling conflict.
- ZC - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:09 am:
Chance was probably up All Night, took a Smoke Break, got Lost, thought, “No Problem” and wouldn’t you know it, he heard his Favorite Song and his Brain Cells ran out of Juice. Blessings on you Chance, from all your Summer Friends.
- A guy - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:14 am:
We’re going to see a Perp Roll. Don’t see that everyday.
- Been There - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:15 am:
===I haven’t been this excited about something being apprehended by authorities since Dec. 9, 2008.====
Ironically our very own late great commentator was named Bob(RIP) and had one of the funniest post ever that morning.
- West Side the Best Side - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:19 am:
Guess sometimes “I got a guy” just doesn’t work. Sorry, Alligator Bob.
- A guy - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:19 am:
Hiding in Humboldt Park ain’t as easy as it once was. Even for a reptile.
- Dirty Red - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:22 am:
“Who’s the amateur now?!” - Gator Bob clutching a half-full bottle of Malort as he stands over the blacked out visitor from Florida.
- Amalia - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:23 am:
maybe he’s up here in gator rehab. down in Tennessee they are telling people not to flush meth down the toilet because it is affecting gators.
- Responsa - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:25 am:
Awww what a sweet face. Is he gonna be OK Uncle Lar?
- Streatior Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:31 am:
It looks like he’s saying, “We haven’t evolved in 10 million years and you had to call in somebody from out of state to catch me?”
- anonymouse - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:34 am:
It’s a herp walk not a perp roll.
- Huh? - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:44 am:
The alligator will be in attendance.”
Alligator later cancels citing a scheduling conflict at the Cajin Connection in Utica. The gator is to be greeted with beer batter, slaw, and hush puppies.
- Atbat - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:51 am:
I was hoping for a spectacled caiman.
- lakeside - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:53 am:
==herp walk==
Thank you for this.
- obiter dictum - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 10:58 am:
Responsa, loved the reference to “animal stories”. Uncle Lar and little snot nosed Tommy in about 5 minutes.
- Flapdoodle - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 11:12 am:
Chance may only have his baby teeth, but those baby teeth can shred your hand faster than an alderman under investigation can shred evidence.
- Keyrock - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 11:25 am:
I heard it took them so long to find Chance because he was using a burner phone,
- Dee Lay - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 11:38 am:
Seriously, Chance the Snapper needs to have his own exhibit at Brookfield. THINK OF THE MERCH!
- Lynn S. - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 11:50 am:
Chance the Snapper has been caught? The weather may be beautiful, but that news makes this a very sad day…
- ZC - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 12:18 pm:
Dee Lay, I don’t think the zoo people would want to incentivize this kind of gator-dumping, in any way. It’s been fun but send Chance back to his swamp retirement home in Florida.
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 12:52 pm:
ZC, Chance will be better off in a zoo. There’s a story about invasive pythons in this month’s Smithsonian that has convinced me to never go south of Daytona again.
- Kentucky Bluegrass x Featherbed Bent x Northern California Sinsemilla - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 3:12 pm:
I am glad that Chance is still alive after all the chat about the gator’s potential demise as reason why Alligator Bob couldn’t capture him. I guess it all boils down to Speaker Madigan and the volunteer alligator wranglers he controls.
- CEA - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 3:27 pm:
Tough break, Chance. Hope they send you someplace nice.
- Bilbo Swaggins - Tuesday, Jul 16, 19 @ 6:25 pm:
Heard Chance will be at the cubs game tonight. Any odds he has intentions on running for Alderman?