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Question of the day

Thursday, Mar 8, 2018

* Rep. Hurley…



In the background…

* The Question: What do you think Chief Mapes was talking about on International Women’s Day?

- Posted by Rich Miller        

39 Comments
  1. - 360 Degree TurnAround - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:04 pm:

    “There is someone eating popcorn on the floor. Please remove them”.


  2. - 47th Ward - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:07 pm:

    Mapes: Hello, Speaker’s Office.

    Bart Simpson: “Hello, I am calling for a Mr. Kolzeoff. First name Oliver.”

    Mapes: Let me check. Oliver Klozeoff? Oliver Klozeoff? I want Oliver Klozeoff right now…


  3. - We'll See - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:09 pm:

    Badges? We don’t need no stinking badges.”


  4. - Spliff - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:10 pm:

    Yes, security. A large group of subversives has gathered in the front of my chamber … please release the hounds.


  5. - Mama - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:12 pm:

    Mr. Speaker, the women have taken over.


  6. - Norseman - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:12 pm:

    “I want that slushy out of my chamber. Who let that in here? Are you going to clean the carpet, huh? Do you know how much that cost?”


  7. - zatoichi - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:12 pm:

    And some bread too? Yes, Dear.


  8. - Ron Burgundy - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:15 pm:

    “No, I can’t meet you in the gallery, I’m busy!”


  9. - We'll See - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:17 pm:

    “Yes Speaker, now they are demanding fresh apples…..and no granny smiths.”


  10. - Boone's is Back - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:20 pm:

    “Rathsksaller is out of apples? This isn’t the day for this.”


  11. - Honeybadger - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:21 pm:

    “I will ask them now if they will support you for another term as Speaker of the House”


  12. - Al - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:26 pm:

    Thin crust. Uh huh.


  13. - 47th Ward - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:27 pm:

    I like to imagine a lot of Mapes’ calls go something like this one:

    https://www.c-span.org/video/?c4526484/bob-newhart-lincoln-phone-gag-npc-1995


  14. - Huh? - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:28 pm:

    I want 25 large pizzas delivered to the governor’s office. 10 pepperoni, 10 cheese, and 5 veggie.


  15. - Oswego Willy - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:31 pm:

    “The Speaker doesn’t like any phones. He doesn’t have one in his Ward Office, the Capitol, anywhere. He gets all his calls second hand, then, if it’s a governmental issue he has Mapes call the people back from an outside phone. There were guys, like Mapes, that’s all they did all day long was take care of the Speaker’s phone call.”


  16. - Henry Francis - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:32 pm:

    Yes Speaker, they are all lined up and ready for you to chose. Make sure you bring the final rose.


  17. - Oswego Willy - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:34 pm:

    “Operator, I need ‘Mr. Music’, loud… “


  18. - Signal and Noise - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:37 pm:

    Of course I didn’t organize this. If I did they’d be matching.


  19. - Oswego Willy - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:37 pm:

    “Listen, Chuck Goudie can’t be at every exit, k. Find where he is, then bring the car around… “


  20. - Arthur Andersen - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:37 pm:

    “Steve, come in here right now. I’m outnumbered. By women.”


  21. - Oswego Willy - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:39 pm:

    “No, I didn’t order cannoli… “


  22. - Oswego Willy - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:41 pm:

    “For the 9th time, you didn’t call on election night… I’m not saying you called… well, it’s not true for starters… “


  23. - VanillaMan - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:47 pm:

    I already ask and they all claim that they’re unwilling to make coffee for you.


  24. - Texas Red - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:49 pm:

    Mr. Speaker I’m not sure how they got in here - I’ll check the list and of course I will treat staff with respect and keep all relationships strictly professional


  25. - VanillaMan - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:50 pm:

    I’m going to need a chaparone


  26. - VanillaMan - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:53 pm:

    No sir.
    Ladies.
    That’s right.
    I’m not sure what they want.


  27. - Rutro - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:54 pm:

    No sir, the clocks you gave them aren’t in the picture, but they did say “timesup” when they took the pic.


  28. - 47th Ward - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:55 pm:

    Hello? Uh, hello D- uh hello Dmitri? Listen uh uh I can’t hear too well. Do you suppose you could turn the music down just a little? Oh-ho, that’s much better…yeah…huh…yes…Fine, I can hear you now, Dmitri. Clear and plain and coming through fine…I’m coming through fine, too, eh?…Good, then…well, then, as you say, we’re both coming through fine…Good. Well, it’s good that you’re fine and…and I’m fine…I agree with you, it’s great to be fine…a-ha-ha-ha-ha…Now then, Dmitri, you know how we’ve always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the Bomb…The *Bomb*, Dmitri…The *hydrogen* bomb! Well now, what happened is…ahm…one of our base commanders, he had a sort of…well, he went a little funny in the head…you know…just a little…funny. And, ah…he went and did a silly thing…Well, I’ll tell you what he did. He ordered his planes…to attack your country…Ah…Well, let me finish, Dmitri…Let me finish, Dmitri…Well listen, how do you think I feel about it?…Can you *imagine* how I feel about it, Dmitri?…Why do you think I’m calling you? Just to say hello?…*Of course* I like to speak to you!… *Of course* I like to say hello!…Not now, but anytime, Dmitri. I’m just calling up to tell you something terrible has happened…It’s a *friendly* call. Of course it’s a friendly call…Listen, if it wasn’t friendly…you probably wouldn’t have even got it…They will *not* reach their targets for at least another hour…I am…I am positive, Dmitri…Listen, I’ve been all over this with your ambassador. It is not a trick…Well, I’ll tell you. We’d like to give your air staff a complete run-down on the targets, the flight plans, and the defensive systems of the planes…Yes! I mean, if we’re unable to recall the planes, then…I’d say that, ah…well, ah…we’re just gonna have to help you destroy them, Dmitri…I know they’re our boys…All right, well listen now. Who should we call?…*Who* should we call, Dmitri? The…wha-whe, the People…you, sorry, you faded away there…The People’s Central Air Defense Headquarters…Where is that, Dmitri?…In Omsk…Right…Yes…Oh, you’ll call them first, will you?…Uh-huh… Listen, do you happen to have the phone number on you, Dmitri?…Whe-ah, what? I see, just ask for Omsk information…Ah-ah-eh-uhm-hm…I’m sorry, too, Dmitri…I’m very sorry…*All right*, you’re sorrier than I am, but I am as sorry as well…I am as sorry as you are, Dmitri! Don’t say that you’re more sorry than I am, because I’m capable of being just as sorry as you are…So we’re both sorry, all right?… All right.


  29. - Ron Burgundy - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:55 pm:

    “Yes Sir. Follow the standard procedure. Tell them to “Knock it off,” and if that doesn’t work think of something else…”


  30. - Responsa - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 3:55 pm:

    “Actually Mike, they all look pretty happy. Happier than we might have expected. So yeah, I think the “problem” is probably trending toward the fade phase.”


  31. - Responsa - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 4:01 pm:

    “They’re claiming they want an official jeans day and they’re not going to contribute a dime to you to get it.”


  32. - 360 Degree TurnAround - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 4:05 pm:

    “Please remove Mr. Drury’s chair, internet connection, and green button”.


  33. - AlfondoGonz - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 4:05 pm:

    “Good thinking, Mr. Speaker, funding Jeanne’s campaign, per the Rauner camp. She’s a no-show.”


  34. - Dance Band on the Titanic - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 4:06 pm:

    “I think I’m being harassed.”


  35. - 47th Ward - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 4:14 pm:

    “Hello, this is Sen. Dick Durbin. We need progressive leaders to fight against Trump’s extreme healthcare cuts. That’s why we need to support Michael Madigan and Silvana Tabares for Democratic state central committee…” *click*

    *dialing*

    “Hello, this is Sen. Dick Durbin. We need progressive leaders to fight against Trump’s extreme healthcare cuts. That’s why we need to support Michael Madigan and Silvana Tabares for Democratic state central committee…” *click*

    *dialing*


  36. - Rich Miller - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 4:15 pm:

    47th Ward is on fire. That last one is an all-time classic.


  37. - wordslinger - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 5:18 pm:

    “I told you, I don’t care how much it costs, I want it in copper.”


  38. - Anon - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 5:24 pm:

    ===47th Ward is on fire. That last one is an all-time classic.===
    I thought his 3:07 post was pretty funny but surprised you let it stay up


  39. - Quizzical - Thursday, Mar 8, 18 @ 5:42 pm:

    Yes, sir, you are getting older. Those aren’t pages, they are full grown women who are elected members of the caucus. I don’t think they want to hear about the time you played golf with David Cassidy.


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