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The last roast post you’ll ever see, I swear on my life

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* Many, many thanks to everyone who participated in my charity fundraisers last month. We raised something like $60,000 net for Lutheran Social Services of Illinois and another $4K for the Harrisburg tornado victims. Plus, we had a heckuva lot of fun.

* Saturday’s roast went off without a hitch. Here are a few quotes via David Ormsby…

* Skip Saviano: “There is no middle ground with Rich, either you hate him or you detest him.”

* Doug Miller: “What’s more diseased and non-functional than Illinois government? Rich’s liver.”

“I’m very proud that I have a sibling who is an award-winning journalist. Unfortunately, that sibling could not be here tonight.”

* Paul Green: “If it be a sin to covet wealth, honor and fame, then Rich Miller is the most offending individual alive.

“When Rich’s brother returns to Texas, the IQ of both states will go up.”

* Judy Baar Topinka: “Only Rich Miller could get all these politicians together in one room without a subpoena.”

“I’m amazed Rich’s parents had children after him.”

“‘Caption contest’ means I’m taking a nap.”

* John Cullerton: “We are here to honor the Tribune writer, Rick Pearson.”

Dave McKinney had more on Twitter.

The night before Saturday’s big roast, I dreamt that I was being shot at by Serbian militia members. How appropriate.

* A few photos. Speaker Madigan and Senate President Cullerton before the event…

Cullerton was the emceee..

Comptroller Topinka looked well preserved…

Carol Marin rapped. Yes, you read that right. She rapped…

Best dressed roaster…

My brother Doug was probably the best roaster, if I do say so myself…

Reaction shot…

It was good to see Sen. Brady…

After the roast, I played “Forever Young” with the band, Voodoo Pilot…

My parents…

There were no audio or video recordings of the roast, thank goodness.

posted by Rich Miller
Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:05 am

Comments

**There were no audio or video recordings of the roast, thank goodness. **

I knew that I should have recorded it!

Comment by dave Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:17 am
It was a good time, have to admit between hearing Carol Marin Rap, The Phone Call, and Lisa Madigan’s song response thing where she started getting down a touch to some Public Enemy my life is complete…

Comment by OneMan Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:22 am
===I knew that I should have recorded it! ===

I woulda had you charged with a felony. lol

Comment by Rich Miller Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:22 am
Of the raster comments that you printed, JBT had the best …“‘Caption contest’ means I’m taking a nap.”

LOL

Comment by PublicServant Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:28 am
Great stuff. Kudos.

Comment by just sayin' Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:34 am
Does Madigan ever smile?

Comment by Anonymous Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:36 am
Really great idea Rich, especially for Lutheran Sevices and Harrisburg.

Comment by mark walker Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:45 am
What do you mean, last roast post ever? You will turn sixty in just about ten years.

Start taking notes, everybody.

Comment by Aldyth Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 10:48 am
Madigan is laughing all the way to eternity

BTW did you omit a picture of Sen. Dillard but include NoTaxBill to help or hurt one or the others 2014 Guber bid?

BTW-2 Did you omit a pix of the AG because she has already won the 2014 Guber

Comment by CircularFiringSquad Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 11:06 am
Rich won’t be able to do a roast in 10 more years, Aldyth, he will have had to move on to Jello by then…

Comment by Cincinnatus Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 11:06 am
Judging by the gags, the roasters have been up many late nights watching those Dean Martin infomercials.

Comment by wordslinger Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 11:10 am
Since us many of us didn’t get to roast you….

Either Rich’s mother has aged beautifully or Rich has aged terribly……Nevermind, I think we all know the answer.

And $60K is rather impressive, that is the best part of the whole post.

Comment by TCB Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 11:20 am
It was a great event and congrats on raising all that money.

However, after looking at the pics, I just realized that your dad is Sen. John O. Jones, lol

Comment by SBux Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 11:25 am
**I woulda had you charged with a felony. lol **

Don’t worry… I was too busy watching the Final Fout on my phone.

Comment by dave Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 11:55 am
Rich’s mom is younger than he is? Neat trick!

Comment by Mom Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 12:21 pm
It is a tragedy that this roast will not be repeated on CLTV ad infinitum.

Comment by Boone Logan Square Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 12:47 pm
12:21 stole my post. Rich is that your Mom, or your younger sister?

Comment by Rarely Posts Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 12:55 pm
Paraphrasing of course:

“I’m glad so many lawmakers could be hear to support Lutheran Social Services of Illinois…Its the most money LSSI is gonna get from the cheap [expletive for fatherless children redacted].”

- Rich Miller

Rich, I like many of your friends, fans, and even detractors hope your birthday becomes an annual charity event, even if not a roast, for whatever cause you choose.

The one-eyed man is king in the land of the blind, and that makes you a venerable Saint in Illinois politics.

Comment by Yellow Dog Democrat Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 12:57 pm
I know I can trust a man who likes brown liquior.
I’ll be damned your ma is younger than you.

Comment by mokenavince Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 2:33 pm
You seemed to take the only quote from Skip that you would allow on your blog.

Comment by Bill F. Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 2:38 pm
“…And the mailman jumped out of the closet… Ta Da!!!

Comment by WizzardOfOzzie Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 2:52 pm
Great time all around. Never seen a roast outside of comedy central pulled off like that.

Comment by Boone's is Back Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 2:59 pm
Rich, I’ve been to a number of roasts including my own 50th birthday party roast 8 years ago (my birthday is March 28th). What a great time! That was the best (deleted expletive) roast I’ve seen, and a funder at that. As a fellow Lutheran, I’m pleased to see LSSI benefit from your ripe old age. Thanks for including the shot of me with Senator Brady. I’ve got a Carol Marin shot on my Droid that’s not bad. Of course I treasure the photo of you and me together. Best regards…

Comment by John K. Norris Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 3:05 pm
We at Lutheran Social Services of Illinois want to express enormous appreciation to Rich for making our agency the beneficiary of your birthday bashes. And thank you to the hundreds of you who participated in the pre-roast at Boone’s in Springfield and the Big Roast in Chicago. For more pics of Rich’s Roast, please see our FB page at http://on.fb.me/HsUCP1. Thanks, again!

Comment by Lutheran Social Services of Illinois Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 5:05 pm
I liked the M-C’s quip best: “Tom Cross won’t be a speaker tonight. Tom won’t be a speaker for a long time.”

Comment by reformer Monday, Apr 9, 12 @ 7:25 pm
Pretty nice you were able to raise money for a great organization on the backs of pols.

Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 9:39 am