Capitol Fax.com - Your Illinois News Radar

Caption contest!

Posted in:

Illinois

* It’s been a serious day, so let’s lighten things up a bit.

Most of the civilized world is now familiar with the Boat Drink Caucus…

Isn’t it enough for state Rep. Chad Hays, R-Catlin, to be one of just 118 members of the Illinois House of Representatives?

Now, the sometimes rock ‘n’ roll star is going to play at next month’s inaugural concert with his band, the Boat Drink Caucus, which will open for headliners Toby Keith and Buddy Guy. […]

“It should be fun,” said Hays, who sings and plays acoustic guitar in the Jimmy Buffett-like group that also features Rep. Mike Tryon, R-Crystal Lake (guitar) and Sen. Don Harmon, D-Oak Park (guitar and bass).

It’s truly a fun band. And even if you’re not going to the big show tonight, they’ll be playing around town during session.

* And what better way to celebrate than with a portrait of Rep. Hays the, um, artist as a young, um, man?…

posted by Rich Miller
Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:23 pm

Comments

“Do you think these pants are too dull, Dude?”

Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:27 pm
Singer? Politician? Heck no, I’m going to be a professional football player!

Comment by Norseman Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:27 pm
“Kevin Arnold and Winnie Cooper? They’re just friends!”

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:27 pm
It was the last time mom decided to go clothes shopping at Pat Quinn’s house of fashion for young men…

Comment by OneMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:29 pm
One day, all hipsters will wear pajamas in public!

Comment by Rich Miller Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:29 pm
“Boy, you don’t know nothing! Mighty Mouse is a cartoon. Superman’s a real guy. There’s no way a cartoon could beat up a real guy.”

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:30 pm
Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Inductee to Perform at Inauguration (not pictured)

Comment by Ron Burgundy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:31 pm
“I always saw myself as a Keith, not a Danny Partridge.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:32 pm
Well, it’s one louder, isn’t it? It’s not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You’re on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you’re on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?

Comment by 47th Ward Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:32 pm
“Hey Alice, I think Oliver just jinxed my pants!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:34 pm
- 47th Ward -…lol “11″

It became apparent that shopping for pajamas once a year needed…revising…

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:35 pm
“Her name is Sheila, and she plays one smoking banjo!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:35 pm
“To Do” list…

Shorter hair, longer sleeves

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:36 pm
It’s uncanny how much Hays looks like Harmon at that age…

Comment by Loop lLady Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:37 pm
“NO - I wasn’t forced into the locker…um, I had to get some books and the wind blew the door closed!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:37 pm
Eleven. Exactly. One louder.

Hays goes to eleven.

Comment by 47th Ward Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:38 pm
Looks like Squints from ‘The Sandlot’.

Comment by Bogey Golfer Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:39 pm
“It wasn’t until much later in life that Paul would find his true calling, both in public service and on stage. He didn’t need Winnie nor I for that, he was his own man now” - voice of Kevin Arnold

Comment by Anonymoiis Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:40 pm
“Do you think this football shirt makes me look like OJ?”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:40 pm
I thought I destroyed that picture!

Comment by Sunshine Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:42 pm
“No one is cooler than Nixon!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:43 pm
- 47th Ward -,

I wish he was named after the Patron Saint of Quality Footwear”.

“Caption?”

“No! The shirt shows of my ‘Popeye’ muscles!”

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:44 pm
“One thing’s for sure, I’m not hanging around Danville!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:44 pm
“My mom says it’s unlikely I’ll go bald.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:46 pm
Are you hungry?
Hey mom, can we get some meat loaf!

Comment by Anonymous Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:47 pm
“I’d marry Jan, but I’d love to date Marcia.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:48 pm
I have a strange feeling every middle class kid from the 1970s has this exact same picture in the family album!

Comment by William j Kelly Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:49 pm
(h/t to - Bogey Golfer -)

“Michael Squints Palledorous walked a little taller that day. And we had to tip our hats to him. He was lucky she hadn’t beat the…out of him. We wouldn’t have blamed her. What he’d done was sneaky, rotten, and low… and cool. Not another one among us would have ever in a million years even for a million dollars have the guts to put the move on the lifeguard. He did. He had kissed a woman. And he had kissed her long and good. We got banned from the pool forever that day. But every time we walked by after that, the lifeguard looked down from her tower, right over at Squints, and smiled.”

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:50 pm
“It has a banana seat and a sissy bar and if I use three baseball cars, it sounds like a Harley!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:52 pm
“Trust me - there is no way the Cubs are going to keep losing during my lifetime!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:53 pm
“So this big creepy kid from Chicago comes up to me…Blagojevich was his name…”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:55 pm
“How much taller to do I look when I stand on my toes like this?”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:56 pm
“The older guys told me that girls are like Tribbles, and you know what that means, right?”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:58 pm
“I have over twenty million Wacky Pack stickers!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 2:58 pm
“All I have to do is get on Route 1, Dixie Highway, and in two hours, I’m meeting Ron Santo!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:00 pm
“My mom told me I’m old enough to use deodorant.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:01 pm
After years and years of waiting “The Bozo Show” tickets arrived. I was told to dress younger, so I’d get picked for “Bozo Buckets”, so..,

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:02 pm
With a house full of kids this old and younger, I can easily come up with another dozen real life quotes from the VanillaFamily that fit Chad in this photo.

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:03 pm
Yeah, I like “The Six Million Dollar Man”, but if that station comes in fuzzy, I watch “S.W.A.T.”

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:03 pm
This was my Ray Manzarek phase…

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:06 pm
“If Illinois and Indiana got into a war and we lost, I would never speak Hoosier, except as a spy.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:07 pm
Right now I’m in charge of the light show, pretty soon I’ll be a headliner.

Comment by A guy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:08 pm
“When I watch Charlie’s Angels, I get this thing that happens…”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:08 pm
The outfit short-circuits Barry Livingston look-alike Chad Hayes audition for My Three Sons.

Comment by Anonymous Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:09 pm
“Billy Mumy is the coolest kid in the universe and Angela Cartwright is a babe, but she has to lose that stupid alien monkey.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:11 pm
“If I go to the gas station to buy your Kents, can I keep the change?”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:13 pm
“When I can, when I get bigger - I’m going to smoke a pipe.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:14 pm
“My teacher said that heroin is like Pop Rocks, but it kills you faster, especially when you drink beer with it.”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:15 pm
“My love of rock and roll is because of my love of The Banana Splits! BEST GROUP EVER!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:19 pm
“My mom said if I keep this up I’m going to become a dirty hippy!”

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:20 pm
Goober alert! Someone will pay for that. Paybacks. Big time.

Comment by Ginhouse Tommy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:30 pm
I’m calling Guinness. Nilla Man just broke the record for “Posts on one Caption Contest” formerly held and defended almost daily by O Willy.

Hays will get NO part of the prize money.

Comment by A guy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:42 pm
After yet another Three Stooges marathon Chad told his folks he wanted to be a state legislator….

Comment by OneMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:45 pm
You mean we are going to Dispensa’s Kiddie Kingdom?

Cool!

Comment by OneMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:46 pm
As a youngster, confusion reigned, football or golf, as seen by this picture

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:47 pm
4H taught me to never name my project or it’ll be too hard to eat later.

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:50 pm
“Let me have a Three Musketeers, and a ball point pen, and one of those combs there, a pint of Old Harper, a couple of flash light batteries and some beef jerky.”

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:51 pm
All the WEBELOS I know wear Hai Karate.

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:51 pm
Vacation Bible School taught me how to be a man.

Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:53 pm
“I have a strange feeling every middle class kid from the 1970s has this exact same picture in the family album!” Well, I don’t. But that’s not because I didn’t look exactly like that….

Comment by Skeptic Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:55 pm
Trying to be “cool” Chad went to school without a shirt.

This was the only shirt in the lost and found…

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:55 pm
“You can have a shirt that fits or pants that fit, you can’t have both…”

Comment by Oswego Willy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 3:56 pm
The Ayatollah of Rock N’ Rolla…..

Comment by Anonymous Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 4:30 pm
A poster child for the old show “What not to wear”. He probably is wearing a bag over his head today.

Comment by Ginhouse Tommy Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 5:14 pm
He has never looked so good!

Comment by Seriously Monday, Jan 12, 15 @ 5:14 pm
A Portrait Of The Artist As A Hood…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g19usz28Cvo

Yes I know 3rd Bass tracks….

Comment by OneMan Tuesday, Jan 13, 15 @ 9:29 am