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Question of the day

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* From a press release…

The Illinois Tollway wants its customers to have their say on safety by suggesting eye-catching messages for electronic roadway signs that discourage dangerous driving.

Beginning today, customers will have a chance to see their message up in lights by submitting concise, creative slogans that warn against impaired driving, distracted driving and not wearing seatbelts.

* The Question: What message(s) would you put on electronic roadside signs at Illinois’ borders?

Snark is heavily encouraged.

posted by Rich Miller
Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 11:57 am

Comments

  1. KY border - “Welcome to North Kentucky, Bruce Rauner, Governor.”
    IN border - “Welcome to West Indiana, Bruce Rauner, Governor.”
    WI border - “Welcome to South Wisconsin, Bruce Rauner, Governor.”
    IA border - “Welcome to East Iowa, Bruce Rauner, Governor.”
    MO border - “Welcome to East Missouri, Bruce Rauner, Governor.”

    Comment by Anon Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:02 pm

  2. “Members of Congress, Check Odometer to Ensure Accurate Mileage Reporting”

    Comment by LakeviewJ Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:04 pm

  3. KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD!!!

    Comment by spidad60 Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:08 pm

  4. Reading this safety sign is unsafe

    Comment by PublicServant Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:08 pm

  5. “Slow down! (A state trooper is hiding behind this sign!)”

    – MrJM

    Comment by MrJM Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:09 pm

  6. Always buckle up- your life depends on it!
    (drivers drawing a state pension- please ignore previous message)

    Comment by Roadiepig Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:09 pm

  7. Free training for motorcyclists!

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:09 pm

  8. Welcome to Illinois Land of Bipartisan Corruption

    Comment by Nearly Normal Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:09 pm

  9. Potholes ahead!

    Comment by Diogenes in DuPage Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:10 pm

  10. Roadiepig for the lead …..

    Comment by Diogenes in DuPage Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:11 pm

  11. Illinois - Welcoming politicians to it’s prisons for over 40 years and counting!

    Comment by Roadbuilder Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:11 pm

  12. “Considering the inherent danger in taking your eyes and attention away from the task of driving, especially at the high speeds allowed on this expressway, the management wholeheartedly advises that you do not read this sign.”

    Comment by Man with a plan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:12 pm

  13. “Welcome to Illinois! At least you’re not in New Jersey!”

    Comment by Stones Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:12 pm

  14. TURN BACK NOW

    Comment by eh Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:13 pm

  15. “Sorry, not your message. Try again next time.”

    Comment by Pot calling kettle Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:13 pm

  16. Speed camera clocked you at 78. Remit fine of $250. Fine doubles in 15 minutes.

    Comment by Louis G Atsaves Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:14 pm

  17. Do not apply makeup while driving.
    Do not text while driving.
    Do not dress while driving.
    Do not eat a full breakfast while driving.
    Do not brush your teeth while driving.
    Do not post on Facebook while driving.
    Do not catch up with Instagram while driving.
    Do not drive and Twitter.
    Do not blow dry your hair and drive.
    Do not pluck your eyebrows while driving.
    Do not floss your teeth while driving.
    Do not pull out your nose hairs while driving.
    Do not try to clean out your back seat while driving.
    Do not try to scrape ice off your windshield while driving.
    Do not eat pizza while driving.
    Smile! You are on camera.
    Drive like your mother is in the car.
    Do not breastfeed while driving.
    Do not beat your children while driving.

    As a toll way user for years - I’ve seen a lot of really stupid things being done behind the wheel.

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:14 pm

  18. Read ‘Capital Fax’!, just not when driving.

    Comment by Rufus Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:14 pm

  19. Tex Ting Memorial Highway

    Comment by aufjunk Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:14 pm

  20. Welcome to the State of Chicago - Democrats Only

    Comment by Gone, but not forgotten Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:15 pm

  21. Welcome to Illinoi$.

    Comment by Union Man Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:15 pm

  22. “Hey! Don’t look at your cellphone! Look up here!”

    Comment by Sheila Simon's Banjo Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:15 pm

  23. “Drivers: submit your warnings by texting #SAFE to 54252!”

    Comment by Sheila Simon's Banjo Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:16 pm

  24. Hone$t politician$ NOT Welcomed!

    Comment by Union Man Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:16 pm

  25. Welcome to Illinois, Bruce V. Rauner, Governor. Union members not welcome.

    Comment by Rich Miller Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:18 pm

  26. roadiepig is right on

    Comment by anon Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:19 pm

  27. “WE’RE GLAD YOU CAME”

    “TO OUR FAIR STATE”

    “CONGRESS PAYS WELL”

    “BUT MILEAGE IS GREAT!”

    “BURMA SHAVE”

    Comment by Old Shepherd Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:19 pm

  28. Sigh

    Comment by Anonsense Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:22 pm

  29. Drivers belonging to unions are restricted to the right lane.

    Comment by Earnest Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:22 pm

  30. We accept debit, credit cards, cash and electronic deposits.

    For your convenience, we’ve added a 15% corruption gratuity to everything you buy.

    For the next 210 miles, there will be no scenery.

    Put away your camera, you are in Illinois.

    Instead of driving during rush hour, get to your destination by canal.

    If you are a first time visitor - welcome!
    If you are a returning visitor - welcome back!
    If you live here - sorry about the past twenty years!

    Illinois - where the world is flat.

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:22 pm

  31. I still long for the scared straight oldies: Welcome to Illinois/Rod Blagojevich/Governor.

    Comment by south side Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:23 pm

  32. Sale leaseback inquiries welcomed.

    Comment by Anonsense Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:24 pm

  33. Corruption Ahead!

    Comment by one of the 35 Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:24 pm

  34. Our imprisoned governors and political leaders welcome you to Illinois.

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:24 pm

  35. “Welcome to Illinois. We’re just as confused as you are.”

    Comment by Oswego Willy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:25 pm

  36. Welcome to Illinoyed

    Comment by jimmy eats Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:25 pm

  37. After Kerner
    Powell
    Walker
    Ryan
    Blagojevich
    Jackson
    Schock
    and Rauner
    YOU DON’T SCARE US!

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:26 pm

  38. “Welcome to Illinois. Lease with Option to Sell. Serious offers only. Bruce V. Rauner, Executor.”

    Comment by Oswego Willy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:26 pm

  39. Watch out for falling bond ratings

    Comment by AFSCME Steward Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:26 pm

  40. Feel yourself at home and break a law in Illinois!

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:27 pm

  41. This road for sale.
    Bargain basement prices!
    Just 4 U

    Comment by another Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:28 pm

  42. Yes - you are in Illinois - so stop crying.

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:28 pm

  43. Welcome to Illinois, where leadership and honesty come to die.

    Comment by 340 East Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:28 pm

  44. Welcome to Illinois. Where our Governors make our license plates.

    Comment by exbricklayer Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:29 pm

  45. Caution - Buckle up for the next MILLION MILES!

    Comment by WhoKnew Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:30 pm

  46. Welcome to Illinois, do not worry Bruce Rauner will be gone in 3 years and 9 months.

    Comment by 340 East Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:30 pm

  47. Illinois - mile after mile of corruption so vile

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:30 pm

  48. “Welcome to Illinois. The Flyover State.”

    Comment by Oswego Willy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:31 pm

  49. Illinois, where corruption never goes out of style

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:32 pm

  50. Abandon all hope ye who enter here

    Comment by Archiesmom Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:32 pm

  51. This ain’t beanbag
    Get out while you still can

    Comment by joe joe Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:33 pm

  52. Repeating the “Burma Shave” theme:

    TO PLEASE OUR GOV
    IS NOT SO HARD
    GIVE UP YOUR PENSION
    AND YOUR UNION CARD
    RAUNER CRAVE

    Comment by aufjunk Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:33 pm

  53. Drive defensively! George Ryan issued licenses to many of these motorists!

    Comment by Under Further Review Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:34 pm

  54. Illinois - Obama’s Gomorrah

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:35 pm

  55. Keep your eyes on the road,
    your hand upon the wheel
    J Morrison

    Comment by zatoichi Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:38 pm

  56. Since we’re talking tollways…

    “Welcome to Illinois, where the toll transponders actually work!”

    Seriously, the difference between iPass and EZ-Pass is huge.

    Comment by The Stork Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:40 pm

  57. Welcome to the State formerly known as Land of Lincoln, on 150th celebration of his death Lincoln wants his good name back.

    Comment by backward Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:41 pm

  58. Are these my pants?

    Comment by OneMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:43 pm

  59. Welcome to Illinois - LOL!

    Comment by VanillaMan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:43 pm

  60. At all entrance-ways to Illinois:

    Abandon hope all ye who enter here

    Comment by a drop in Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:43 pm

  61. Pension debts in the rearview mirror may appear closer than are.

    Comment by Mittuns Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:44 pm

  62. Yield to the Right of Wing.

    Comment by Mittuns Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:44 pm

  63. “Welcome to Illinois. Whatever you do, steer clear of me unless you want a (Redacted) problem. Bruce V. Rauner, Governor.”

    Comment by Oswego Willy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:46 pm

  64. Welcome to Illinois Land of Special Interests.

    Comment by Bluecollargal Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:47 pm

  65. Actual sign that I saw in another state

    Keep your eyes on the road and your head out of your apps.

    Comment by Huh? Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:49 pm

  66. Welcome to Illinois Pay No Attention to that Noise its just Our Bond Rating Dropping (again).

    Comment by the Cardinal Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:50 pm

  67. Cheap Trick Day, every April 1.

    Comment by The Drummer Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:51 pm

  68. Nothing to see here- move on.

    Comment by dixiechick Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:52 pm

  69. “Line Forms Here for Corporations Moving to Chicago.”

    http://fortune.com/2014/11/04/chicago-leads-businesses/

    Comment by Gooner Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:52 pm

  70. Be afraid, be very afraid.

    Comment by dixiechick Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:52 pm

  71. Your Mileage May Vary.

    Comment by Mittuns Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:53 pm

  72. Keep it under double nickels…and put ‘em in our slot machines!

    Comment by Jocko Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 12:57 pm

  73. Illinois the armpit of the nation

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:00 pm

  74. The public employees of Illinois welcome you. Their pension money paid for this highway.

    Comment by DuPage Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:05 pm

  75. SQUIRREL!

    Comment by Commonsense in Illinois Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:07 pm

  76. Welcome to Terminus.

    Comment by old-pol Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:12 pm

  77. Watch out for local Congressmen; milage reports say they’re all around you!

    Comment by Wensicia Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:13 pm

  78. Burma Shave Style:

    Whether Golden Boy
    Or F#$*$ng Golden’
    Corruption is the Illinois Way
    From a Club Fed
    You can reflect each day

    Comment by How Ironic Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:14 pm

  79. Slippery Pols Ahead For Next 100 miles.

    Comment by b-non Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:17 pm

  80. Pick a lane.
    Rest assured there are no exits here.

    Comment by A guy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:17 pm

  81. dixiechick

    Think it works better a la Elmer Fudd:

    “Be vewy vewy afwaid.”

    Comment by Anyone Remember Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:19 pm

  82. Open Road Tolling and Ticketing.
    Don’t worry, we’ll keep track.

    Comment by A guy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:21 pm

  83. Fines quadruple in Non Enterprise Zones.

    They just do.

    Comment by A guy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:22 pm

  84. Decatur 50 miles
    Springfield 95 miles
    Peoria 151,000 miles

    Comment by A guy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:24 pm

  85. GODSPEED FAIR TRAVELER

    HIC SUNT DRACONES

    Comment by Graduated College Student Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:24 pm

  86. Get out of the freakin left lane unless you’re passing…moron.

    Comment by Chicago Cynic Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:26 pm

  87. You’re late to work, you overpaid underworked peon

    Comment by Just An Ordinary Lawyer Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:32 pm

  88. Union card holders must exit here for interrogation and detainment.

    Comment by vibes Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:36 pm

  89. Caution: union bosses ahead.

    Comment by Philo Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:41 pm

  90. Cash Toll $1.90 Cars

    Comment by Six Degrees of Separation Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:41 pm

  91. Welcome to Illinois, please turn out the lights when you leave.

    Comment by The Colossus of Roads Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:42 pm

  92. Land of Lincoln…it’s been downhill since then!

    Comment by D.P.Gumby Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:42 pm

  93. All your base are belong to us.

    Comment by Wondering Woman Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:43 pm

  94. WITHOUT A GUN
    THERE IS A COST
    UNTIL YOU NEED IT
    AND DISCOVER IT’S LOST
    LOST GUNS SAVE LIVES?

    Comment by Arthur Andersen Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:53 pm

  95. “Caution-Unfunded Liability Next 357 miles”

    Comment by Arthur Andersen Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:55 pm

  96. Sign Paid for by the Illinois (Please Don’t) Turnaround Agenda.
    Bruce Rauner, Governor

    Comment by chi student Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:55 pm

  97. The coins you slip into the slot
    Supports our graft
    So thanks a lot!😃

    Comment by Gantt Chart Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:56 pm

  98. = Huh? =

    That electronic you saw was on the interstate thru Nashville TN

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 1:57 pm

  99. Wisconsin: Illinois’ largest state park

    Comment by QCLib Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:04 pm

  100. @A Guy, LOL at the mileage to Peoria. Well played sir.

    Comment by How Ironic Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:10 pm

  101. Welcome to the great utopian state of Raunerville! Where sacrifices are shared and Unions don’t exist!

    Comment by BlameBruceRauner Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:10 pm

  102. Honk If You’re Distracted By This Sign!

    Comment by Former Titan Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:25 pm

  103. Our sketch comedy group ‘Far From Famous’ made an entire video about this sign here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0FgzBgy_8c

    Comment by fffcomedy Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:30 pm

  104. NEXT EXIT

    Oprah trinkets for sale

    Comment by Tommydanger Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:32 pm

  105. Welcome to Illinois
    Most of the Union-ized police force is gone so there is little surveillance but the citizens ask that you don’t hit them with your car.

    Comment by Belle Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:33 pm

  106. Welcome to Illinois. Still not as bad as New Jersey.

    Comment by Amalia Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 2:55 pm

  107. Illinois- Land of Lincoln just because he ran away from Ohio and Indiana.

    Comment by 340 East Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 3:10 pm

  108. Welcome to Illinois. Home state of Barack Obama. Buy your congressional seat today as the 18th District just opened up!

    Comment by LA Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 3:30 pm

  109. The State of Illinois wishes to draw your attention to research indicating that taking your eyes off the road for an extended period of time while you are driving is considered risky, and in some cases criminal, behavior.

    Comment by 22skidoo Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 3:43 pm

  110. Welcome to IL. Stay LEFT to run out of gas and road…

    Comment by Careful what you wish for... Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 3:56 pm

  111. Land of Safe Drivin’

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 3:57 pm

  112. Turn off your blinker.

    (2 miles later)

    Turn OFF your blinker.

    (2 miles later)

    TURN OFF YOUR *&^%$ BLINKER!!!

    Comment by BIG R, Ph Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:01 pm

  113. Welcome to Illinois– Please be Watchin’ Your Drivin’– Bruce Rauner, Governor

    Comment by Reggaeman Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:04 pm

  114. Reckless driving, bad Reckless spending, good… Disclosure: Reckless spending paid for this sign…

    Comment by Careful what you wish for... Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:06 pm

  115. Speed kills keep off the grass

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:24 pm

  116. Speed trap ahead

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:26 pm

  117. Welcome to Illinoiz
    We know you ain’t stayin’
    But could you please
    Buy a little sumthin’
    We need the money
    FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SEND HELP!

    Comment by Anon Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:31 pm

  118. Speed time measured between tolls

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:38 pm

  119. Please slow down.
    -Sgt John Doe, ISP.

    (the only person left at ISP after Rauner’s budget cuts)

    Comment by jerry 101 Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:47 pm

  120. Welcome To Illinois!

    Speed Limit 5 MPH

    You were caught exceeding speed limit by our speed cameras.

    Fine $250

    Please text #PAYFINE to 99999 to pay your fine

    Also, please text #PAYFINE to 99998 to pay your fine for texting while driving ($250).

    Sorry, we need the money.

    Comment by jerry 101 Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:54 pm

  121. Welcome to Illinois

    Toll rates now apply to all roads.

    Please remit payment of $3 per mile driven to:
    Illinois Department of Transportation
    2300 S. Dirksen Parkway
    Springfield, Illinois 62764

    Comment by jerry 101 Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:57 pm

  122. Welcome to Illinois!

    We have video gaming in our Porta Potties!

    Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:58 pm

  123. ” ”

    (budget cuts)

    Comment by jerry 101 Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 4:59 pm

  124. Welcome to Illinois
    Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter

    Comment by jerry 101 Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 5:00 pm

  125. “If your reading this sign your about to hit the stopped car in front of you at which time you will be issued a citation for distracted driving.”

    “P.S. Welcome to Illinois”

    Comment by Empty Suit Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 5:02 pm

  126. Toll and Tax Free Tomorrow

    Comment by walker Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 5:24 pm

  127. No sex while driving!

    Comment by Mama Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 5:42 pm

  128. If you are from Indiana, please take the governor home with you. He is lost.

    Comment by Mama Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 6:03 pm

  129. Welcome to Illinois where we don’t hide our corruption.

    Comment by FormerParatrooper Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 6:19 pm

  130. We got a bear in the air.

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 6:44 pm

  131. One toll booth open ahead

    Comment by Anonymous Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 6:54 pm

  132. Always wear your seat belt…unless you are digging for your toll.

    Comment by Jasper Wednesday, Mar 18, 15 @ 6:56 pm

  133. Not a suggested sign, but–A great idea, because garish, attention-grabbing signs couldn’t possibly take your eyes off the road.

    Comment by Harry Thursday, Mar 19, 15 @ 12:50 am

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