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Email rsvp@paulsimoninstitute.org to register for Lt. Gov. Evelyn Sanguinetti's lecture 9/17. Today is the last day! pic.twitter.com/s5tx1bFMyp
— SIUC (@SIUC) September 14, 2015
posted by Rich Miller
Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:26 pm
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“… Then… My foot seemed to miss the State Museum steps… And I’m like this…. ‘Aaauugh!’… Right before I fell… Now, what else do you need for my deposition…”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:29 pm
“In this hand?… My magic dust… In this hand?… A lock of Speaker Madigan’s hair… and two Apple seeds from an apple, he just ate today… Now… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:30 pm
“I’m going to grip the state of Illinois, just like this, and turn it around!”
Comment by Tournaround Agenda Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:31 pm
Maybe she will announce how we will reduce the levels and numbers of local governments in Illinois. That’s what Rauner said would be her primary task.
Comment by walker Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:31 pm
Now watch me whip, now watch me nae nae…
Comment by Poolguy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:34 pm
And a One, and a Two… good job editors, keep in step now.
Comment by Anon221 Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:35 pm
“So the day that we won the election, I held up the microphone like this, dropped it, and followed Brucey’s orders to not speak publicly any more. Hey, did anyone else have trouble negotiating the sidewalk outside? Just curious, wink.”
Comment by out of touch Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:35 pm
“And there we were in the middle of the field late one night…and I put my hands up against it like this…and BOOM! The cow tipped right over.”
Comment by Jimmy Baseball Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:35 pm
“I’m your new intern.”
(”At least you can find some humor in this situation.”)
Comment by walker Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:36 pm
When Bruce asks how much I love him, I say Sooooo Big…
Comment by burbanite Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:36 pm
I was here, in Lincoln County… No, there’s a Lincoln County… Look…. Here’s Lincoln County… Here’s like McHenry or Edgar or DeWitt County… (Pause, puts her hands to her sides, regroups)… I’ll start over. Here’s Lincoln County… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:37 pm
I’m the real “wing man” to the Governor. I do this much better than Leslie does.
Comment by Tony Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:37 pm
“So I sent the email to get a job with Governor Quinn… And it was floating… Floating… Just. Like. This. … And then, I didn’t get a job with the Quinn Administration… Guess the email got lost in the air… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:39 pm
“And then Yukon Cornelius said, ‘Look what HE can do!’ and the Bumble put the star right up on top of the Christmas tree!!!”
“My question, Lt. Governor, was about the budget…”
– MrJM
Comment by @MisterJayEm Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:40 pm
“No, I’m here, she’s… Here… Below me… I’m much more sane than Jeanne Ives… This much more sane… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:40 pm
And this is how we make our puppets at the Tribune editorial board speak …..
Comment by A Jack Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:46 pm
“Then… Then I got to fly on the state plan… Up, up, up, I went… I was really high in the sky… I looked down… Cows… Pastures and pastures of cows… Like little black and white and brown dots… Grazing… It was spectacular… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:46 pm
“My papers, Mr. Trump? What papers are you talking about? I’m one of the good ones…”
Comment by Wordslinger Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:46 pm
I looked at Bruce way up there and he patted me on the back and said, Evy, just stay in you office so you don’t get in trouble.
Comment by Norseman Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:46 pm
“Now, keep in mind, this is a hurricane up here… And down here… Kristen McQueary… Now, she’s on her roof, but the storm is still up here… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:47 pm
Lt. Gov. Sanguinetti shows off The Emperor’s New Budget.
Comment by thechampaignlife Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:51 pm
“I don’t understand why you don’t get this. (Sigh) Here is Lincoln County…”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:52 pm
I am now very good at Wax on, Wax off and pretty soon Mr. Rauner-San say I ready to use my karate skills to take out Mikey Madigan.
Comment by former southerner Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:54 pm
My right hand approximates the top of the stairwell, my left hand the wall that I always manage to hit at the bottom. Every. Time.
Comment by How Ironic Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:54 pm
I’m telling you, the last Lt. Gov was at least this tall.
Comment by Give Me A Break Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:54 pm
I’ve moved on to cow pinching and cow slapping, and it’s made my visits to Springfield more fun than ever!
Comment by AC Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:55 pm
So then I said “Bruce - leave all the first part of the word, all the other letters up here. And then take the G sound and that’s down here. Just drop the G and it you will be very authentic soundin’”
Comment by siriusly Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:56 pm
“No. No, the Dome is up here. You need to take stairs to get to the tippy-tippy top… people tell me,… so my Staff keeps me down, like over here… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:56 pm
This is how you do the state-house tango.
Comment by Mama Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:59 pm
At the State Fair… you haveta be ‘This’ tall to go on the big slide… I’m only “This” tall… So, I just rode a pony… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 2:59 pm
Utilizing her skilled abilities as a mime, Evelyn Sanguinetti demonstrates how her job as Bruce Rauner’s Lt. Governor feels just like being trapped in a silent, invisible box.
Comment by Don't Worry, Be Happy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:07 pm
“Mike Madigan’s bank account is even bigger than this.”
Comment by Steve Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:09 pm
“The Laffer Curve starts way up here and when it’s done is goes way down here into the theoretical dumpster. Just ask Kansas.”
Comment by Jorge Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:13 pm
“So I was holding the cow’s ear with my right hand and nudging it with my left hand trying to get it to ttip over. I’m not sure what was wrong with my technique.”
Comment by ToughGuy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:14 pm
I’m a little tea pot short and stout,
Here is my handle here is my spout……
Comment by Jaded Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:17 pm
I’m using sign language because Bruce said I couldn’t speak publicly after the election.
Comment by Wensicia Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:27 pm
Let’s all sing that great campaign song “I’m not a witch!”
Comment by D.P.Gumby Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:28 pm
First I would like to thank Governor Rauner for letting me talk today. Usually he will not let me talk or leave Chicago.
However, he told me though to just talk a teeny weenie bit (pinching her right hand fingers together to signify small) - and to be sure not use any long sentences or big words or talk to very long (waving her left hand to across to signify long)
With that I thank you for this opportunity. Good bye and be sure to support the Governor’s turnaround agenda. The Governor told me to say that. Good bless you all.
Comment by Joe M Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:29 pm
“For the camera this time?… Sure… You ready?… Ok, here’s Lincoln County… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:32 pm
Channeling her inner Ditka “This is your IQ buddy, zero”
Comment by Jake From Elwood Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:33 pm
Original commenters 29, that weird ow guy 11 ! Really?
Comment by A Citizen Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:47 pm
- A Citizen -,
Sorry I made you take off your shoes to get to 11. You ok?
“Caption?”
“So… That lil ‘Bill’… He’s sitting way up there… Way up there, and hopes… and he prays that they will… But today his still… and this is important… just a ‘Bill’… And that’s what Madigan is doing to the Turnaround Agenda. Understand?”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:51 pm
“… ‘How do you get to Lincoln County?’… Well, up there, they have a train station, I think, a train depot… They have a small airport too… I think that’s where I spoke, the small airport… Can’t believe you’ve never been there. I know its way up over there… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:54 pm
12! Good lord, quantity isn’t quality. Surely you can work harder on the latter, please. Thanks
Comment by A Citizen Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:55 pm
– Sorry I made you take off your shoes-
This one goes to 11
Comment by Wordslinger Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 3:57 pm
Geesh Word, he needs no encouragement from you! Recount - my count was correct except for the toes valuable one.
Comment by A Citizen Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:01 pm
“Everyone’s a critic”.
I promise, I won’t comment on your blog.
“Caption?”
“I have Jiminey Cricket up here, Tinkerbell on my desk, that’s all the brain trust any Lt. Governor needs…”
(Tips cap to - Wordslinger- )
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:02 pm
You hold the bag up here and the tube goes around back,and then you just wait a few minutes..
Comment by Chicago 20 Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:06 pm
So on the Trump scale, Bruce is down here and Donald is up here. So I told them, heck ya I’m available. I can start right away. I don’t even have the governor’s cellphone number.
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:07 pm
Who is Lt. Gov. Evelyn Sanguinetti? That is the question……
Comment by JS Mill Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:08 pm
Meet my little friend Jose Jimenez
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:09 pm
Keep going, OW, AC can’t get beyond twenty.
Comment by Wensicia Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:10 pm
I know there are women, like my best friends, who would have gotten out of there the minute their governor gave them a budget to slash. But I didn’t. I got to admit the truth. It made me happy.
Comment by 47th Ward Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:12 pm
Wheaton’s cash reserves started up here and then, after my settlement, were down here.
Comment by Jocko Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:14 pm
A Citizen, when you grow up and get your own blog, then you can go after one of my favorite commenters. Until then, back off or just fly away. Thanks.
Comment by Rich Miller Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:14 pm
“Up there… That’s the hill… I’m the lil engine. I can… K?”
Thanks, Rich.
I’m lucky you like the way I sing “Chicago”…
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:22 pm
“So I opened the window… Said a spell… And ‘woosh’, I saw all the bad karma fly out before my eyes… That’s how I help… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:26 pm
Wensicia, I feel as if I’m the victim of mistaken identity and thoroughly enjoy OWs posts. I know, AC was shorthand, and I’m hoping no one adopts “OW” as a Nickname because “Oswego Willy” is too much to type out sometimes!
Comment by AC Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:30 pm
The LTG shows off her man hands.
Comment by Former Titan Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:30 pm
- AC -, lol.
“…I lifted up the hood on the trash can van… Smoke billowing out… I knew right then and there, the gasket seal broke on piston 3… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:35 pm
Geez Rich, my apologies - Really.
Comment by A Citizen Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:35 pm
“Every day, one of my staffers brings in a chart of all the state agencies, even the teeny-tiny ones, and we start at the top; Aging… and… Aging… and… they’re all there… and we just go over them… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:37 pm
Sorry, AC. it was shorthand and I meant no harm.
Comment by Wensicia Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:39 pm
“So when he asked the people in the room, who wants to be my lieutenant governor, I shot up my arm just like this. And the rest, as they say, is history.”
Comment by GA Watcher Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:45 pm
“… ‘My biggest fear as Lt. Governor?’… Wisconsin is up there… They invade… We take them on… Then… Indiana swoops in on our flank… Goodbye Illinois… ‘Biggest fear?’ … Wisconsin and Indiana attacking… At the same time… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:49 pm
Wensicia, no offense taken, I was enjoying it. Now, if I could just get my tablet to memorize Willy and not Willie I’ll be set.
Comment by AC Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:49 pm
On one hand you chop on the other hand you rip out guts
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:54 pm
AC you need to edit your tablets spellcheck.
Comment by A Citizen Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:55 pm
=A Citizen, when you grow up and get your own blog…….=
And that is what you call being taken to the woodshed.
Comment by JS Mill Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 4:56 pm
One hand on the handlebar the other makes a right turn signal
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:00 pm
I drive looking under the wheel like this
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:05 pm
“When pet Owls ‘molt’,… you can help them… by holding them …by the talons, …upside down, like so… and just pick off the feathers…”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:07 pm
Before you fly off on your broom check the bristles first
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:09 pm
And, I’m going to be lecturing about, I dunno, uh, how far apart my hands are showing how far Brucie is out of touch with IL voters?
Comment by sal-says Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:09 pm
JS Mills - Perhaps, but I haven’t gotten the dreaded “Bite Me” for a very long time!
Comment by A Citizen Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:12 pm
“I have seen them together. Oswego Willy is about this tall, and Arthur Andersen about this much shorter.”
Comment by Arthur Andersen Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:16 pm
Hold the voodoo chicken in this hand and swing it with this hand
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:20 pm
- A Citizen -, this is usually the part where I buy you a drink and all is well…
“Caption?”
“On session days, if I’m outside in the Rotunda… I reach up… grab the top of the Rail… then I let all the lobbyist rush past me… and I’m safe. No spills.”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:22 pm
The Rauner salute and one hand clap
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:25 pm
- AA -, not going to lie, I was wearing lifts… Medical reasons.
“Caption?”
“It’s a dream, really, I leave it way up there, way up there. I just wipe away all those dreams, wave them away with my hand… I mean, me being ‘Governor’… Do you realize all that would have to happen for me to be governor?… Really?… And then I’m governor?… That can’t be right… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:30 pm
Oswego Willy said this is the way you snipe hunt
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:30 pm
I put a spell on you because you’re mine
You better stop the things that you do
I ain’t lyin’, no, I ain’t lyin’
I just can’t stand it babe
The way you’re always runnin’ ’round
I just can’t stand it, the way you always put me down
I put a spell on you because you’re mine
Comment by Cheryl44 Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:36 pm
It’s Groundhog Day and Lt. Governor Sanguinetti just came out of her hole. She saw her shadow and will go back into the hole for another six months.
Comment by 4 percent Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:37 pm
So I reach up…just like this…I reach up and pinch his kneecap…and I say, Hey Buddy!….yeah, just like that…Hey Governor…my eyes, they’re down here!
Comment by Commonsense in Illinois Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:42 pm
So I grab Goldberg by the scruff and put sense into him with this hand
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:53 pm
No, really. My intellect is WAY up here; Brucie? Like down here, oh, maybe lower. But, geez, don’t tell him I said that; I’ll never get out in public again.
Comment by sal-says Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 5:59 pm
ck and me? We’re about this close, yeah, closer than me and The Emporer.
Comment by sal-says Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 6:03 pm
Me and the gov? We’re having This.Much.Fun!
Comment by sal-says Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 6:05 pm
“And when I slipped I tried to grab onto something like this.”
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 6:06 pm
Willy, you have come close to exceeding your best series of postings. The only ones that are better are when we are talking about and referencing to Jason.
Keep up the snark - you do it far better than I could ever expect to be able to do - enjoy your comments. You have few peers and no competitors on this blog.
The cannolis are still on me.
Comment by illini Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 6:08 pm
First you hold up the budget then insert the turnaround
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 6:18 pm
“First, you make your hand like for the ‘O’…then, well, the Willy gesture is….”
Comment by My New Handle Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 7:36 pm
Watch me again Governor, when riding the Brown line with Rahm grab the overhead rail like this and then slap the crap out of him!
Comment by qualified somebody nobody sent Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 7:49 pm
(Tips cap to - illini -)
“Caption?”
“…I looked at the Board and I saw all these ‘yellow’ colors next to Republican in the House and the Senate, I pointed and asked about it. I’m still pointing and I was ushered out of the balcony by my staff, and I haven’t been back in either chamber since.”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 8:00 pm
The “Turn Around Agenda” is like this or is it like this, Ok I’m confused, sorry!
Comment by XDNR Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 9:16 pm
“Now watch me whip…now watch me nae nae”
Comment by kj Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 9:16 pm
So there I am at the table, ready to make decisions and Bruce says that he’s already decided to make no decisions until the Democrats betray their central political beliefs. So I am like, ‘Whoa! That’s how you made the big bucks.’
Comment by Quizzical Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 10:30 pm
The governor said I had to be present so I wore yellow
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 10:41 pm
Knock-knock joker
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 10:49 pm
“Maybe if I give you a visual it will help. Up here, this is Bruce’s Agenda, the Governor’s agenda. K? All this other stuff down here, all this open space, everything else in… everything… We don’t care about it. Me and Bruce. The Governor. Nothing else matters. They told me that, so I believe it I guess… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Sep 22, 15 @ 11:13 pm