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After @ILSecOfState stopped laughing, he was gracious enough to pose with #BudgetBeard pic.twitter.com/lBRVlZ52CX
— Chris Kaergard (@ChrisKaergard) April 14, 2016
posted by Rich Miller
Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 11:50 am
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“No, Sectetary, I have a bow tie on… wait… gimme a sec… one second… See?”
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 11:54 am
“Sectetary, I’m wearing more Earth tones now, it highlights the reds and browns in my beard”
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 11:58 am
Clean shaven man stands in line at the DMV, when finished he posses for a picture with the Secretary of State.
Comment by Ahoy! Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:01 pm
“Mr. Kaergard, I’ll take the picture, but the bows in your beard have to go first… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:01 pm
If and when Illinois gets a budget, I will be donating my beard to a charity for men who are pogonotrophically challenged. It is going to be long enough to provide mustaches for 25 males.
Comment by Huh? Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:02 pm
“Yes, it’s true I stop shaving each time you announce you are not running again. Then I shave it again when you get re-elected.”
Comment by siriusly Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:02 pm
While the beard didn’t make Secretary White nervous, it was when Mr. Kaergard pulled out the envelope he stored in his beard that made Secretary White most nervous…
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:06 pm
What Secretary White wanted known about this picture is, contrary to popular folklore, Mr. Kaergard had that beard when he entered the Drivers Services Facility, it was not grown waiting in line for his license renewal…
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:09 pm
Van Winkle Wakes, Passes Driving Test
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:11 pm
JW: Shaving your head until there’s a budget is a much better way to go.
Comment by AC Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:14 pm
Ahoy! +1
Hysterical!
Comment by Cubs in '16 Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:15 pm
“I wouldst like to hand thee my buggy registration payment”, says the inappropriately dressed Amish man. (Amish men are supposed to wear plain mostly black clothing for modesty.)
Comment by Honeybear Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:15 pm
One of these things isn’t like the other.
Comment by Stones Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:22 pm
I should’ve shown him the new license I had to get a few months ago, complete with beard
Comment by Chris Kaergard Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:27 pm
Why, yes I do have a special napkin that I wear to keep food crumbs out of my beard.
Comment by Huh? Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:37 pm
No, Secretary White, I am not trying out for a part on Duck Dynasty.
Comment by Huh? Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:38 pm
The beard more than makes up for being folllicly challenged on top.
Comment by Huh? Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:42 pm
Mr. Kaergard hands Secretary White incorporation papers and announces “Budget Beards and Biscuits” a new LLC that will allow franchisees with long beards and a byline the exclusive rights to sell delicious buttermilk biscuits during any and all governmental proceedings under the newly christened brand name.
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:48 pm
You’re telling me the Hawks won last year?
Comment by Keyrock Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 12:50 pm
I love the Comcast commercial about Settlers so much that I decided to become one.
Comment by A guy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 1:09 pm
JW: I’m pretty sure there’s a property violation on your chin. I’ll send out an inspector.
Comment by A guy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 1:10 pm
Life imitating art.
https://webnerhouse.files.wordpress.com/2016/01/bird-beard-peter.png?w=261&h=441
Comment by 47th Ward Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 1:11 pm
You need to stop waterin’ that Chia pet.
Comment by A guy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 1:11 pm
Chris Kaergard, who was recently tapped to head the SOS license plate renewal division, immediately became the scapegoat for the failure of Illinois residents to receive their renewal notices.
Said SOS Jesse White: “I mean, look at this guy. We’ve lost all kinds of things because of that beard. Nothing can get through that thing. We’ve called in some outside help to search that beard. We won’t rest until those renewal notices are found.”
Comment by Demoralized Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:03 pm
One half of the Smith Brothers gives Secretary White advice on how to stop a nagging cough.
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:28 pm
After trying in vain to find his collar, Chris Kaergard says “phooey” to neckties.
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:30 pm
JW: “Say, buddy, you don’t comb that while you’re driving, do you? ‘Cause that would be distracted driving.”
CK: “No, I only comb it on days when the Governor says he’s going to meet with the Speaker.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:33 pm
JW: “Hey, I thought I saw something move in there!”
CK: “That would be Bruce, my pet chinchilla.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:36 pm
JW: “How do you eat soup with that thing?”
CK: “Capillary action!”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:37 pm
JW: “How do you eat soup with that thing?”
CK: “It’s quite a strain.”
Comment by Rich Miller Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:38 pm
At the rate we are going the beard will be to the waist before we have a budget. Chris, I admire you.
I do have a very close beard myself - could never deal with what you have produced - but be prepared for it to get even longer. Thanks for the photo.
Comment by illini Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:41 pm
JW: “You know, when I was a kid, somebody would have whacked that off to make a Davy Crockett cap out of it.”
CK: “If the budget is ever passed, I’m going to store it in my dresser drawer for when I need a toupee.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:42 pm
“Am I in the right line for the Fiddler on the Roof audition?”
Comment by Bogey Golfer Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:43 pm
“Secretary White poses with new organ/facial hair donor.”
Comment by The Man on 6 Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 2:55 pm
Well, Honeybear got to the Amish angle first, (good job!) so AA is back to Stage 1.
JW: “Ray Long, isn’t it? Boy, that’s quite a beard you’ve grown since you moved to Chicago!”
Comment by Arthur Andersen Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 3:26 pm
For some reason I’m finding it remarkably difficult to avoid highlighting an unintentionally hilarious turn of phrase by Streator Curmudgeon @2:42pm. It is very tempting, but I’m not gonna do it.
I’m going to take the high road for once.
Comment by 47th Ward Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 4:12 pm
47th:
Appreciate your restraint.
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:06 pm
JW: “Tell the rest of the guys in ZZ Top I’ve always liked your music.”
CK: “Uh, will do, sir.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:09 pm
JW: “One suggestion for summer: K-9 Advantage.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:12 pm
JW: “If I had about a thousand of those, they’d make great stuffing for tumbling mats.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:13 pm
Zach Galifanakis prepares to talk ferns with Secretary White…
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:17 pm
“So I met the Secretary of State, again, and I got my picture taken, again. I had 13 Doc-tor Peppers… “
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:19 pm
Secretary White takes time to honor the last known decendent of the Foggy Bottom Boys…
Comment by Oswego Willy Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:21 pm
JW: “A word of advice: Don’t vacation in the Ozarks on Sadie Hawkins day.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:22 pm
CK: “Thanks for the gift certificate to your barber, Mr. Secretary.”
Comment by Streator Curmudgeon Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 5:25 pm
Nonbudget growth issue
Comment by Rabid Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 10:27 pm
Face time with the budget
Comment by Rabid Thursday, Apr 14, 16 @ 10:44 pm
Another hair brain budget idea
Comment by Rabid Friday, Apr 15, 16 @ 6:33 am
“I vowed to grow a beard until I get my renewal notice in the mail.”
Comment by Doi Chef Friday, Apr 15, 16 @ 6:35 am
Goldberg goatee
Comment by Rabid Friday, Apr 15, 16 @ 7:51 am
Mike ‘Hipster’ Fortner and Jesse White pose for a selfie
Comment by John on the spot Friday, Apr 15, 16 @ 8:26 am
“I like to do 5 sets of lifts like this a day, keeps the cheeks toned”
Comment by French Friday Friday, Apr 15, 16 @ 3:05 pm