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Illinois

A Senate committee hearing yesterday showed just how bad things are between the two parties in that chamber. Sen. Susan Garrett was trying to pass a sweeping ethics bill that would normally receive bipartisan support, but things quickly devolved…

Before the committee could take further testimony, Sen. Christine Radogno, R-Lemont, said she supported the legislation and would become a co-sponsor, “except I don’t like to participate in scams.”

It contains good ideas from both parties, Radogno said, but “we both know this is not going to become law. This is going to be exactly what’s happened for the last two years, when we swap these bills at the end of session and absolutely nothing happens - it dies in the opposite chamber.”

“So I’ll put my name on it,” Radogno said, “but just so everyone knows, it’s baloney. It’s not going to happen.”

Democratic Sens. Debbie Halvorson of Crete and Rickey Hendon of Chicago defended Garrett, with Hendon telling Republicans that Garrett has “more morals and ethical bones in her probably than the entire other side of the aisle.”

Republican Sens. J. Bradley Burzynski of Clare and Dale Righter of Mattoon complained they resented the personal attacks. Garrett then said that “I’m going to do something you’re probably not expecting me to do.”

She said she would take the bill out of the record and attempt to call it for another vote today.

Question: What solutions would you offer to help heal the partisan wounds in the “upper” chamber? Snark heavily encouraged.

Have fun.

posted by Rich Miller
Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:35 am

Comments

Let’s note Garrett was smart enough to vote “no” on the gaming swindal so she might actually know what she is talking about.
That also means she can expect to get Forby-ed verrrry soon!

Comment by GettingJonesed Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:45 am
It sure is nice to be ‘represented’ by the best and the brightest. TERM LIMITS NOW!!!!! Send this entire class of two-year olds back to their nursemaids. WAAAAAAAH!!!!!

Comment by Lincoln Log Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:49 am
It is time for us all to be offended and ashamed of the entire bunch.

When will Illinois voters get in the “throw the whole bunch out” mood that we sometimes see at the Federal level?

Comment by Anon Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:51 am
Let’s stick to the question, people. Thanks. Have a little fun.

Comment by Rich Miller Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:52 am
Party on Rich’s boat!

Comment by Anonymous Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:55 am
1. Start Session on time, not an hour and half late everyday.
2. Quit blaming the Republicans for all of your faults.
3. Accept responsibility for 5 failed years of poor Senate leadership under Evil Jones
4. Use the chamber for something other than your personal retirement account or to pad your’ families bank accounts.
5. Not throw members of your own party under bus, then expect them not to look like idiots in their own district.
6. Allow real issues to be settled with an “up or down” vote, instead of worrying about a softball game.

Comment by 6'2" Yeti Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:55 am
Put eveyone in small vans with no air conditioning and they have to travel from Rockford to Cairo on U.S. 51…the old U.S. 51. Not only will they learn how to cooperate out of necessity, but it’ll remind them of what there job actually is.

Comment by Commonsense in Illinois Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:55 am
Let’s send all of them to Our Sister of Divine Punishment and Misery and have them flogged. That’ll show em!

Comment by anon Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:55 am
Their trip to the Dells to avoid the ISP should be a great first step. You could lock all 59 of them into the same cabin.

I’m picturing a “Planes, Trains and Automobiles” type situation on the way to the Dells. Emil and Frank take on the Steve Martin and John Candy roles.

Hilarity ensues when Frank tries to read the directions to Emil, who ignores him and heads down his own road. The bus veers off, crashes through a road closed sign and jumps (ala Dukes of Hazzard) an embankment onto a deserted island. Forget Pirates or Shrek the Third, this is the summer blockbuster. I smell sequels as well.

Comment by Bomber91 Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:55 am
Same answer: Get mature adults in there. Send the children a note to go home.

New answer: Give them all a “time-out”, then next time a suspension, then last time an expulsion.

Comment by Anon Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:57 am
attend a fraternity party at Chicago State University.

Comment by Fire Ron Guenther Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 10:59 am
Democrats have never been about fiscal and ethical reforms in this State. They complain constantly about republicans failures in the ethical arena and refuse to take accountablity for their errors in judgement for the past 5 years that their party has controlled nearly all state offices in the State. The one Republican that did have some ethical responsibilty was JBT and now she’s gone. Quit putting the blame on Republicans and show some guts and ethics!

Comment by Ihatework Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:03 am
Require that an entire session be held where all legislators must be completely naked. By airing their shortcomings, perhaps they would experience a wee bit of humility towards one another.

It is rather difficult to remain angry and pompous when you and everyone around you is naked.

Bill Clinton excepted.

Comment by VanillaMan Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:04 am
Cage match

Tina Turner: “You know the law: Two men enter, one man leaves.”

Comment by Ghost Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:06 am
Scavenger hunt!

(Actually, that really does sound like fun…)

Comment by Kiyoshi Martinez Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:12 am
Do it the old fashioned way - poker.

Dems get 5 players, Reps 3. Do it just like on TV, winner gets to pass their version of the bill in question.

Comment by Pat Collins Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:14 am
Vanilla Man: Ewwwwww!

I’m thinking something more along the lines of a pay-per-view Ultimate Fighting Cage Match. We’ll make billions to balance the budget. Not.

Comment by the Other Anonymous Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:14 am
Democrats and Republicans out,
Greens and Libertarians in.

Plusses: Complete legislative inexperience effectively ends parliamentary shenanigans.

Minuses: Are there 60 Greens & Libertarians in Illinois?

Comment by Underdog Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:25 am
First, here’s one Green that agrees with Republican Senator Radogno. She deserves credit for saying exactly what needed to be said here–rarely is there a genuine intention of actually passing something like this; and stealth legislation, in the form of shell bills, seems to be the norm these days in Springfield.

Second, the Senate could learn a thing or two from internal decision making process used by the Green Party. (Note, this is not the same as unanimity.) It’s a little different than majority rule and always voting–it seeks to hear, address, and mitigate the concerns of the minority.

This type of decision making is actually part of the Green Party platform. For Greens, HOW decisions are made is just as important as WHAT decisions are made. Greens see consensus decision making as (1) less violent and (2) more feminine (i.e. collaborative vs. competitive, supporting the party’s Key Value of Feminism.)

Comment by Squideshi Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:26 am
Pass a law that states if a session goes to overtime that the current leadership, both minority and majority, must change. Maybe that would get Emil and Madigan to play nice with each other and keep Cross and Angry Frank from shooting off at the mouth about the other side.

Comment by Southern Ilinois Democrat Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:27 am
I wouldn’t do anything to change it. We all know politicians only do what’s in their best interest. But this sure makes for great theater. I’d actually like to see them all go to blows like the Korean politicians.
How about Blago and Cross. My money’s on Cross. We all know Blago was a joke in the Golden gloves.

Comment by Lula May Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:35 am
Take them all to the Sparta, IL Shooting Complex.

Comment by Pro-gunner Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:36 am
No healing is possible. The two sides are too childish and pedantic and too much alike for any reconciliation to ever happen.

The Republicans could, for one thing, start acting like conservatives should. Until people can see any difference between the Dems and the so-called Republican party in this state why would they ever change? Your choice now is vote for a genuine liberal Dem or a wannabe liberal Republican. Given the choice you might as well elect the genuine article. At least you know what you are buying.

Comment by Name/Nickname/Anon Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 11:39 am
How about they just quit screwing around and pass HB1, the pay to play bill?

Emil pimping for Rod on this one is going to come back to bite them both.

This is a scam alright, Garrett is just an unknowing participant. Why do you think that Harmon and Raoul both refused to carry the amendment?

Comment by Enough Already Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:05 pm
You want the little brats’ partisan wounds healed? How about making them wear diapers and have a fight with iodine filled baloons?

Comment by i d Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:10 pm
Hug it out…

Comment by OneManBlog Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:12 pm
I say turn them loose in a forest, preferably one with chiggers, give them paint ball guns and the last three standing get to rule the special session.

And no hiding. Especially Rod.

Comment by Papa Legba Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:13 pm
Cage match. Rod and Emil vs. MM and another rep whose testicular virility matches Rod’s. Barring that pair MM with Aaron Schock who at least matches Rod in use of hair care products.

Comment by Tom Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:16 pm
No overtime pay, no per diem, nothing if they go into special session.

Think of the work they would do if they knew they couldn’t suck off of the public’s… uh, public’s money.

Comment by Papa Legba Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:18 pm
To quote Billy Madison:

“I can think of three things. A pitching wedge, a buffalo - preferrably stuffed - and ice cubes.”

I would say that someone needs to wear the old “nacho hat”. It’s fun for all when someone dons the nacho hat!

Comment by Team Sleep Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:24 pm
Replace Emil Jones with Dr. Phil.

Comment by phocion Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:34 pm
It would be a lot of fun and put Illinois on the map if they just failed to show up. Then our State Police (as in Blues Bros.) could fan out all over the state chasing them down and hauling them in to the Big House. We could have Fox News coverage with the helicopters and senator/representative on the street interviews. We would be Proud! Then once they are all back they could pass emergency legislation allowing/mandating booze in the chambers. After each speech they would all have to take a drink. The last one standing gets to be Speaker, President and Governor for a week. This would definitely result in a budget and be entertaining as well.

Comment by A Citizen Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:35 pm
“I say turn them loose in a forest, preferably one with chiggers, give them paint ball guns and the last three standing get to rule the special session.”

Papa - Best solution I have heard yet! Mine involved the desert, a jar of honey and fire ants to gently prod the ‘gentlemen’ in the right direction.

Comment by Lincoln Log Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:38 pm
A Citizen -

Even better - we could book this as Fox’s newest reality series. All we need is a title and this would be a sure hit. Imagine the fun of the ISP rooting them out of new and imaginative hiding places every week! Of course, we would need better writers. The actuals pols have no imagination at all.

Comment by Lincoln Log Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:41 pm
We should make a drinking game out of it:

Stupid comment = 1 drink

Shafting own party with procedural motion = 2 drinks.

Lining own pockets with taxpayer money = 3 drinks.

Voting pay raise for self = Chug.

There wouldn’t be enough booze in Springfield to play this game.

Comment by Name/Nickname/Anon Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:46 pm
Neosporin. It heels and helps prevent scarring.

Comment by Frank Booth Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 12:52 pm
I was going to start writing my overtime movie franchise Pirates of the Prairie, but I think Lincoln Log’s reality TV show idea would be an easier pitch to Fox. Where do I sign up?

Press statement from Guv’s office= 1 shot. We’ll be too drunk to function by Tuesday afternoon.

Comment by Bomber91 Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 1:02 pm
The two political parties are chummy. What else do you feed to the voracious Springfield sharks but chum?

Comment by Jake from Elwood Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 1:06 pm
We have yet to hear from the Senator from Naboo. This budget bil is science fiction anyway.

Comment by fly on wall Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 1:46 pm
Rich, is it true that you requested a gambling license for your new boat? And, by the way, what name is on the boat?

Comment by A Citizen Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 1:59 pm
The BBC had this story from Japan on how to handle corruption in government:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/6697329.stm

Comment by Senator from Naboo Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 2:02 pm
I think if the Governor switched parties it would make the Democrats feel a lot better. Not sure what would do the trick for Republicans.

Comment by Napoleon has left the building Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 2:19 pm
“I think if the Governor switched parties it would make the Democrats feel a lot better. Not sure what would do the trick for Republicans.”

Blago staying as the very visible representative of the Illinois Democratic Party (with his trusty sidekick Emil) suits Republicans just fine.

Comment by Lincoln Log Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 2:24 pm
Tim Nieukirk will save us all…..

Comment by Taylor Street Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 4:06 pm
enforce the smoking ban in leadership offices

Comment by The Horse Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 4:21 pm
How about a new take on a county fair classic-the “Legislative Demolition Derby.” A batch of retired State Police cars can be procured from surplus to make up the fleet. Also, to make this not only a unfying, fun event but a revenue raiser, corporate naming rights will be sold for each car.

Imagine the excitement! Imagine the thrills as track announcers Rich Miller and Rick Pearson call the derby…

…#59 “Sparky” Jones in the Comed Special just ran right over #00 “Chill” Watson in the Carrier A/C Special! Can Watson get going again? Oh, no, Rick, here comes #1 Dillard in the Men’s Wearhouse Special and slams right up the rear end of Watson. It looks like Watson is moving again, but Dillard has blown his radiator.
Rich, look left! It’s the unmarked, unnumbered, black car we’ve heard about all week now taking the track. The only markings: “Madigan.” The sleek black Crown Vic gains speed and tears the Blago #96 Hair Club for Men Special almost in half as he turns in pursuit of #59, his nemesis, Sparky Jones. The black stealth vehicle moving quickly and quietly around the track has dispatched Watson and turns to deal #59 the death blow when…Look, Rich, the steward is waving the red flag. Why is he doing that, Rick? Once they stop these cars, they’re deader than Elvis or GRT.
Well, who is the steward, we can’t see to well from here, looks like,…Topinka??? She’s colorblind!

Comment by Arthur Andersen Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 4:30 pm
To amend my earlier post Jacobs is the obvious candidate for Madigan’s cage match partner.

Comment by Tom Friday, Jun 1, 07 @ 6:36 pm
Since Rich won’t give us the name of his boat, I am assuming it is the “Minnow.”

Lets hope it performs better than our esteemed legislators.

Comment by Papa Legba Saturday, Jun 2, 07 @ 3:29 pm