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* We haven’t done one of these in a while. And it’s Friday, so let’s have some fun…
posted by Rich Miller
Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 1:40 am
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Previous Post: SUBSCRIBERS ONLY - Supplement to today’s edition
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When Cullerton speaks Quinn isn’t interested.
Comment by Levois Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 1:43 am
“Let me explain in detail all of the good reasons why I support the Rickett’s financing proposal.”
Comment by Mighty M. Mouse Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 2:00 am
Unable to round up enough votes any other way, Gov. Pat Quinn employs an I Dream of Jeannie “blink” strategy at a Friday press conference to get Senate Majority Leader John Cullerton to announce he will be calling the pension borrowing bill for a vote that is sure to pass.
Comment by hisgirlfriday Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 2:50 am
The governor, resting up before delivering one of his meandering, monotonous monologues.
Comment by Joe from Joliet Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 5:05 am
If you think the governor looks bored, you ought to see the audience.
Comment by Joe from Joliet Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 5:08 am
Wake up the bus driver he has been sleeping for two years
Comment by Anon Again Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 5:11 am
(i.e. Alexander Haig) Cullerton: I am now in control of the State of Illinois. Gov. Quinn will serve as a figurehead for the next 4 years. He will given orders by Speaker Madigan and myself. If Quinn should attempt to challenge us, Quinn will be sentenced ti life in prison in Madidgastan.
Comment by Anonymous Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 5:12 am
The governor is not moved by Sen. Cullerton’s demand that the 541 term appointees who’s terms have or will soon expire must absolutely be re-nominated. Quote the Cull: “Who else will be “in the field” every Monday and Friday serving my constituency? Who else will keep Springfield hotels flush with taxpayer cash on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday? I mean, a lot of them are my people!”
Comment by Joe from Joliet Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 5:29 am
“I’m dreaming of a big tax increase,
Just like the ones we used to know.”
Comment by Skeeter Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 5:55 am
Hey, at least Quinn’s in a room with the guy.
“Being awake in a room with the guy” is his next hurdle.
And then, if all goes well, “holding a conversation with the guy to resolve differences.”
It is a slow and painful process, but eventually Quinn will learn!
Comment by Skeeter Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 6:00 am
Cullerton sings a familiar lullaby (Good Night, Sleep Tight), putting Quinn into a four year sleep.
Comment by Nuance Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 6:30 am
Gov. Quinn prepares himself in anticipation of Rep. Feigenholtz’ comments.
Comment by Anonymous Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 6:34 am
Mr Quinn! Nap time comes AFTER milk and cookies!
Comment by Wensicia Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:05 am
I think we could save on paper if they could draft talking points on the back of my eyelids.
Comment by Stones Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:09 am
“The Governor and I were up all night looking for Blago appointees who should be terminated and, well, we just couldn’t find any!”
Comment by JustaJoe Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:10 am
“So, those are all my first cousins who have held city office or been on a government payroll. Now, for second cousins, it all started with Seamus Cullerton. He came over in 1858 from County Cork and got a job as a coal shoveler….”
Comment by wordslinger Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:26 am
The “Gov Whisperer” shows off his talent and saves the audience from a long speech at the same time.
Comment by Pot calling kettle Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:34 am
Campaign is over. I don’t have to pretend Cullerton is interesting until 2014.
Comment by Aldyth Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:34 am
“In a show of leadership, Governor Pat Quinn was the first to nod-off.”
– MrJM
Comment by MrJM Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:46 am
PQ meditating as Cullerton is speaking “Our father who art in heaven hallowed be thy name. Please give me strength to deal with these two over controlling leaders and the ability not to waffle constantly.”
Comment by "Old Timer Dem" Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:47 am
“…here’s looking at you, kid. Got it? No one? Humphrey Bogart! That slayed at the Holiday Star in Merrillville. Is this thing on? I can hear you breathing…”
Comment by wordslinger Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 7:53 am
zzz… Polish sausage… zzz… Ditka… zzz… Da Bears…! Da Sox… zzz… Tax Increase… zzz… Frugality… zzz….
Comment by Heartless Libertarian Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:12 am
“Do I think I bore the Governor … that’s the question … Nah … I think the Governor takes what I say very seriously …”
Comment by Oswego Willy Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:17 am
“….and when I awaken the subject, he will
cease to flip-flop and actually begin to provide
leadership!”
Comment by pipersls Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:19 am
Word, you are hilarious.
Comment by Soccermom Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:21 am
“who is this guy?”
Comment by dave Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:23 am
Dear God, Let this be short.
Comment by InParis Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:24 am
Once again budget cuts have caused battery replacement to be delayed on the Quinn-Bot(tm) 1985
Comment by OneMan Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:29 am
When I close my eyes, nobody can see me. Teehee! The Governor just disappeared!
Comment by Soccermom Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:36 am
Gov Quinn listens to tax hike concerns of Illinois legislators.
ZZZZZZZZZZ
Comment by anon sequitor Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:53 am
“I must say John, I can tell you have been working out, you have got a firm tushy” Pat Quinn
Comment by Just Saying Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:53 am
“Oh, thank you Lord, and thank you John, for not putting my name on your ‘re-nomination’ list!”
Comment by skhicks Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 8:57 am
“It is my duty to tell the citizens of the state of Illinois that the governor suffers from Narcolepsy, a sleep disorder that causes frequent daytime sleep attacks. Now, that we know the problem, the governor is involved in a treatment program that will help him stay awake during the day so he can take firm control of the serious issues such as the financial crisis in this state.”
“Without further ado, the governor will now speak to us! Governor Quinn, Governor? GOVERNOR, WAKE UP!!”
Comment by Anonymous Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:06 am
“And now it is my pleasure to introduce the most dynamic Governor this state has ever had……..”
Comment by Ghost of John Brown Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:11 am
“And you thought I was boring!”
Comment by KnuckleHead Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:13 am
With the holiday season approaching I would like to remind those shopping for Gov. Quinn that stafford shirt and tie sets come in colors other than purple.
Comment by prairiestatedem Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:19 am
Quinn to himself: “Bikes. Trains. Stupid cutback amendment.”
Comment by umm Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:20 am
Hoping to be the hero, the governor looks on the floor to see if he can find President Cullerton’s missing upper lip.
Comment by siriusly Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:21 am
At an inter-cultural celebration, Senate President John Cullerton demonstrates his mastery of the Tibetan art of throat singing while Gov. Quinn demonstrates…his…..mastery…….of……..zzzzzzzzzz.
Who cares what these two do? Where’s Speaker Madigan?
Comment by Pot calling kettle Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:21 am
Senator Cullerton: See I told you that Governor could could be easily hypnotized! Now, what should we do first, the tax hike mandate or the free ride for seniors………..
Comment by South of I-80 Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:21 am
“C’mon John, Brady threw in the towel days ago. Just say it - Mandate, Man-date, MANDATE!”
Comment by skhicks Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:24 am
Pat Quinn’s Brain: “Man, Cullerton bores me to tears! Good thing that I’m not hard to listen to when I speak to an audience. I mean, I was in Peoria the other day, or was it Peru, or was it DeKalb? No, it was Peru. By the way, I spoke to a economic development official from Peru just the other day about Illinois exports. Increasing our exports would bring jobs to Illinois, and Peru could be a good partner. And Peru is close to Colombia, and I like Colombian coffee. I could use some coffee right now. Maybe with a little milk. I wonder if Oberweis is around. He plays a mean game of chess. Chess is a great game because it has kings, and after this past election, my overwhelming mandate makes me somewhat like a king. But if I’m a king, why am I waiting and listening to Cullerton? He’s such a rambling speaker.”
Pat Quinn’s Body: Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z
Comment by South Side Mike Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:25 am
“Close your eyes. Breathe deeply. Clear your mind of all…ok, that’s already done, listen to my voice…..we control the horizontal…we control the vertical….”
Comment by JustaJoe Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:25 am
I wonder just what PQ is praying for? Maybe a new/used car? Cullerton to get on with it? The perfect tax hike? (you know, one that MJM will approve of and will bring billions to the gen fund)
So many things to wish for, and so much time.
Comment by dupage dan Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:37 am
Rock a bye baby….
Comment by jt Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:37 am
Quinn: “How much did these bad shoes cost anyway?”
Comment by David Starrett Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:47 am
The android will awaken and operate at my verbal command.
Comment by 42nd Ward Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:51 am
With the election over, Governor Quinn returns to his normal governing routine
Comment by ANON Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:52 am
Can I have my SUV back?
Comment by Mr. Ethics Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:55 am
“Oh my God, he’s not going to whistle ‘Our Lady of Spain’ AGAIN, is he??”
Comment by What planet is he from again? Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 9:56 am
LOGJAM….could you use that word in a sentence? LOGJAM….what is the latin root?
Comment by How Ironic Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:02 am
Gov. Quinn, who suffers the effects of regularly being shocked awake at night–sweating profusely in sheer and abject terror by the conditions of the state he governs– catches a few unobtrusive zzzzs whenever and where ever he can.
Comment by Responsa Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:02 am
“Ok ladies and gentlemen, for my next trick- the AMAZING CULLO will awaken our hyponotized quest and he will become governor of our state. But before we do that- look into my eyes… you’re getting sleeeeepy…”
Comment by Statesman Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:06 am
PQ- ” Ha ha ha my plan is working. They all totally think I’m asleep but I’m not. Not at all I am plotting all day and ……… (yawn) I’m gonna be the best governor thais state h… OOOO a nickel.”
Comment by Noel Lidstrom Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:06 am
Mandate oooohhhhmmmm….
Comment by Zippy Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:11 am
John Cullerton gives a heartfelt eulogy for Illinois Conservatives as Patt Quinn reflects in a moment of prayer. As part of the ceremony a copy of Milton Friedmans “Free to Choose” was burned and the ashes scattered on the Capitol grounds.
Comment by Moving to Oklahoma Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:16 am
“What the heck is going on? Quinn’s napping and I can barely see over this guy’s shoulder? Illinois needs a lift? . . . I need a lift!!”
Comment by Anonymous Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:48 am
Looking down? of course I’m looking down….Jimmy DeLeo is
down there at the controls. where else would I look?
Comment by Amalia Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:57 am
The Otis Redding impersonator starts to kick it in
“oh she may be weary
them young girls they do get wearied….”
Comment by zatoichi Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 10:59 am
MOTHER’S VOICE (V.O.)
They’re probably watching me. Well,
let them. Let them see what kind of
a person I am.
(A pause, as the fly lights on Norman’s hand)
I’m not going to swat that fly. I
hope they are watching. They’ll see…
they’ll see… and they’ll know…
and they’ll say… ‘why, she wouldn’t
even harm a fly…’
Norman continues to gaze ahead into nothing.
Comment by D.P. Gumby Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 11:31 am
Cullerton: Now, let’s all say it one more time but more slowly and with more conviction, “Tax increases are needed”.
Comment by The Shadow Knows Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 11:58 am
It’s OK. The puppeteer is on break. He’ll be back soon.
Comment by Anonymous Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 12:07 pm
I kind of feel like that old ad we ran against Judy Baar in ‘06. What was the tagline? Oh yeah! “What’s she thinking?” That was a goodie, was’t it? Those were the days. I was the good guy, everyone loved me… hee hee. Aghhhh.
That makes me wonder… what was I thinking? I could be fishing right now. Sheesh. Seriously. What the * was I thinking?
Comment by S Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 12:14 pm
I wonder if Sheila will have milk and cookies for me after this?
Comment by S Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 12:16 pm
Cullerton says: “And now for my next trick, when I snap my fingers, Gov. Quinn will wake up and will start clucking like a chicken.”
Comment by Northside Blogger Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 12:49 pm
Might as well sleep since I’m not going to get my way in his Chamber.
Comment by Bring Back Boone's Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 12:55 pm
“I do not fear sleeping giants. Its the people in the background - I don’t know who they are or what they are doing and they are always looking over my shoulder … their the ones I fear.”
Comment by We're Doomed Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 1:02 pm
Without any kitties or squirrels to use for distractions, Governor Quinn resorts to the only option left to him — feigning narcolepsy.
Comment by Ron Burgundy Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 1:54 pm
Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what your gonna get.
Comment by Yup Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 2:48 pm
weekend at bernie’s
Comment by envelop Friday, Nov 19, 10 @ 3:18 pm