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* Yes, I swore on my life that yesterday’s post was the last roast story ever. But this isn’t a roast story. It’s just a caption contest featuring a pic of Comptroller Judy Baar Topinka and Rep. Jack Franks at my roast…
Winner gets something. I haven’t decided yet what it is.
posted by Rich Miller
Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 9:58 am
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JF - “Say it again …”
JBT - “‘Caption Contest’ means I am taking a nap”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:03 am
JF - “I’ll yell ‘What about Rod’ and your say …”
JBT - “What was HE thinking?”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:05 am
JF - (whispers) “…I.L.L. ..???”
JBT - “Jack, I went to Northwestern”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:07 am
JBT: Wipe That Silly Smirk off your Mug or Capt Fax will put us in a caption contest
JF: Great…more free pub without doing anything meaningful.
JBT: Now let’s sneak out for a smoke
Comment by CircularFiringSquad Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:09 am
“No, Judy. It’s RICH Miller, not Roger Miller. He’s the King of the Dome, not the King of the Road.”
Comment by Didn't make it Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:10 am
Judy is holding a paper describing Illinois’ budget problems. Jack is holding the solution…
Comment by Cincinnatus Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:11 am
JBT: No, Lt. Colombo, I never said that.
Comment by retired Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:13 am
Jack, I’m glad to see you wearing the tie I bought you at the salvy.
Comment by Ahoy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:14 am
JF - “‘I met her on a Monday and my heart stood still’ …Judy?”
JBT - “I don’t sing duets, Jack.”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:15 am
JBT: “I’m sorry, I thought you were Larry Walsh.”
Comment by unclesam Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:19 am
“There is nothing to worry about, dear. Fran Eaton says I’m also part of the Democrat Propaganda Machine. She says that about everybody including Dennis LaComb.”
Comment by Skeeter Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:22 am
JF- “Judy you look great.”
JBT-”Thanks, I don’t have much competition: after all Cook County brings out the best in me.”
Comment by Steve Bartin Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:24 am
JBT to JF: Hair coloring, look into it.
Comment by Give Me A Break Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:25 am
C’mon Jack! You can tell me…one Republican to another.
Comment by Bill Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:26 am
JF; “don’t tell nobody but I AM a Republican”!
JBT; “NO kidding?”
Comment by railrat Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:26 am
No I don’t have one Judy but I’m pretty sure you can’t smoke in here anyway.
Comment by just sayin' Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:26 am
I actually had a brain freeze and thought Jack Franks was a Republican, so my comment above makes little sense. In my defense, he often acts like a Republican, and it is still early so that may excuse my confusion.
Comment by Skeeter Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:29 am
Apollo Creed: Ain’t gonna be no rematch.
Rocky: Don’t want one.
Comment by Hopalong Cassadeech Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:31 am
Must be a reverse negative. Franks isn’t to the left of Topinka on anything.
Comment by A Naughty Moose Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:33 am
JF - “Say that joke again …”
JBT - “If you don’t know why it’s funny, then I can’t help you.”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:34 am
Gee, our hair smells terrific!
Comment by wordslinger Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:34 am
JF - “I would love to be on Chicago Tonight, I’m a huge fan.”
JBT - “Jack, Carol Marin is over there …”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:35 am
Really, Rich? You’re taking a nap already.
Comment by Michelle Flaherty Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:41 am
Can you believe what they charge for a drink here….
Comment by OneMan Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:49 am
How about winner gets Rich to come to their office to do their work while THEY take a nap.
Comment by @all Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:50 am
Before I dance with you on camera, please fill out this criminal history sheet.
Comment by anonymice Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:55 am
If JBT is “Beans” (as in “counting beans”), then the caption is:
“Beans and Franks”
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:56 am
JDF: Thoughts on being my Lt. Gov?
JBT: Call me.
Comment by Apple Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:56 am
Yes Judy that joke may kill most people because it is the funniest joke in the world that causes people to laugh themselves to death.
There is a chance, a small chance, that if you tell it even though it will kill the rest of the people in this room, that Mike Madigan may in fact crack a small smile…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Funniest_Joke_in_the_World
Comment by OneMan Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 10:59 am
I may look like your crazy old aunt but if you lost 40 pounds you’d look just like Bill Clinton!
Comment by WazUp Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:12 am
JBT - “Jack … its ‘B.A.A.R.’ … not ‘B.A.R.R.’ like your Press release says …”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:19 am
OK, Jack, here is the next bill we want you to run.
Comment by Pot calling kettle Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:23 am
Jack, if you want to do a puppet show, you need puppets on your hands.
Comment by Pot calling kettle Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:24 am
Jack and Judy discuss their plan to switch jobs for a week.
Comment by Pot calling kettle Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:25 am
JBT - “Jack, you owe me a Carton of smokes already …”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:29 am
JBT - “You keep asking and I keep telling you … You are at the ‘Kids Table’ … I’m sorry”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:31 am
JBT - “I don’t care what you bet Saviano, I will not say the word, ‘jellybean’ so you can win “Roast Bingo’ …”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:34 am
JBT: You look just like Cliff Barnes on ‘Dallas’.
Comment by zatoichi Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:39 am
“No, don’t take the cannoli.”
Comment by Boone Logan Square Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:51 am
- Boone Logan Square -
lol … well done!
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:52 am
JF - “Really, Judy … ‘Rosebud’ was a sled?”
Comment by Oswego Willy Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 12:15 pm
JBT: “Jack, I do love a good Polka, but I really must decline.”
Comment by Jade_rabbit Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 12:15 pm
I just stole Lisa Madigan’s roast notes…here you take em they’re really not that funny!
Comment by WazUp Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 12:23 pm
Judy: “Hi, Jack! I see that Tom Cross couldn’t make it tonight, so it’s great to see that at least one House Republican was able to be here!”
Comment by dave Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 1:54 pm
JBT: “Well, I received an invitation. How did you get in?”
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 2:29 pm
JF:”I know a surgeon who can fix your turkey neck.”
JBT:”Really? What’s the surgeon’s name.”
Comment by ChicagoDem Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 3:00 pm
You think that’s funny, I just had Miller’s car towed and placed in Rahm’s parking spot!
Comment by WazUp Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 3:27 pm
JF: What were you thinking?
JBT: I hated Blago even worse than you did.
Comment by reformer Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 3:34 pm
another edition of… “Hairy and Scary.”
Comment by amalia Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 4:00 pm
JF; Judy, you should invest some of the State’s money in Instagram. It’s going to make a lot of money someday.
JBT: Instagram? What the h*** is Instagram? Is that like a telegram? I can’t even get the State to invest in Coke or Pepsi.
Comment by Arthur Andersen Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 4:06 pm
“Just playing around now, here comes the thing-that-passes-for-my-left-hook at that thing-that-passes-for-your-chin.”
Comment by aufjunk Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 5:39 pm
I don’t know, Jack. How many HDems DOES it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Comment by Dirty Red Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 5:56 pm
You can be as charming as you want, Jack, but I’ll never agree to have my picture taken with you!
Comment by Pot calling kettle Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 8:49 pm
Franks: “Amazing. You’re the third impersonator I’ve bumped into this evening, and all of you look just like her, but ten years younger.”
JB: “It’s me, you twit. And this is the third time we’ve bumped into each other this evening.”
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Apr 10, 12 @ 11:07 pm