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A week ago, Doug Finke wrote this in his column:
Last week we asked readers to suggest names for the new Amtrak trains that will start running in Illinois. Instead of the boring old names honoring Lincoln or other Illinois notables we suggested names that reflect the political climate of the state. Frankly, the response was underwhelming.
Aside from the fact that Finke has chosen to call himself “we,” I thought this was a good idea, but that it might be better suited for our blog.
So, what should the state name the new Amtrak routes?
UPDATE: This was apparently a lame idea by both Finke and myself since the comments have been few and far between. Oops. lol
posted by Rich Miller
Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 4:37 am
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The Bart
The Homer
The Lisa
The Marge
The Rod
The Judy
The George
Comment by vole Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 6:20 am
Graft Express
JobsRUs Express
Pork Express
Initiative Daily
Comment by Disgusted Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 6:46 am
The Daley Express
Comment by Lovie's Leather Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 6:58 am
The Panda Express
Comment by the Other Anonymous Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 7:14 am
Express Yourself
Comment by Pat Hickey Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 7:22 am
The pick pocket express
Gottcha again local
Fools run
The cash and dash express
Crooks run
Smoke and mirror express
Deals on wheels
Comment by The Conservative Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 7:55 am
Name one after the worst Illinois high school team name ever ” The CornJerkers” from Paxton Buckley Loda
Comment by SouthernILRepub Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 8:28 am
The Good News Express
Comment by Rico Shakman aka Wumpus Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 8:37 am
This idea sucked when Finke fizzled with it. You know it is summer when Capt. Fax “borrows” from the SJ-R. But let’s play along, cause we all like to suck up to Rich
How about:
CapFax Comet
Comment by Reddbyrd Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 8:47 am
Assuming there will still be a dining car …
Dine and Dash
But to be honest, I have a hard time believing this won’t be named something along the lines of “Linc-Trak” or “RAIL Splitter.” At times it seems we’re a one note pony … and most time the song is playing in the key of “A-be”
Comment by ThirtyWhat Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 9:10 am
I didn’t think this was all that amusing when Finke tried it the first time either. Getting more Amtrak trains running in this state is a serious and necessary thing. And we should be keeping up he pressure to get the high-speed rail system going as well. That’s something that would good for the entire state.
Comment by Casey Jones Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 10:10 am
How about:
The Clout Route
Comment by WestSub Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 10:42 am
“The Panda Express” is inspired.
My only other idea was “The Road to Perdition.”
Comment by TomD Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 11:13 am
Why, the “Statehouse-to-Stateville Express”, of course.
It’ll run nonstop from our esteemed State Capitol to one’s choice of prisons: Joliet, Chester, Tamms, Dwight, or Marion — and someday maybe even
Thomson, Grayville, or Aroma Park. (Special CTA connection at Union Station/Chicago for either the federal correctional facility or 26th and California — no extra charge!)
Why, it’ll be one of the most heavily used Amtrak trains in the entire state!
Oh, one other thing: it’ll only run one way from Springfield.
Comment by Dooley Dudright Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 11:35 am
No More Business As Usual Express - I’d expect that it will be constantly delayed.
Comment by Wildcat Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 12:08 pm
How about “Open Amtrak Riding” brought to you by Gov. Rod Blagojevich.
Comment by The G Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 1:04 pm
The train to Champaign-Urbana: the “Illi…umm, the Train to The School With The Politically Incorrect Dancing White Man in Native American Garb, Whose Tribal Nickname We Cannot Mention, Express”
The train to Springfield: the “Shoebox Special” in memory of graft past, present and future.
The train to Carbondale: “Why is the state funding this train? I thought Carbondale was in another state!”
The train to Quincy: “The Forgotonia”
Comment by Six Degrees of Separation Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 1:23 pm
Patronage Limited
Comment by Levois Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 2:03 pm
The Peoples Express
(Supposedly everybody’s invited to participate but when you show up you find out you needed to contribute $5,000 to Blago to get your name on the boarding list.)
(And the train menu promises all sorts of goodies, but delivers very few.)
(And there’s a VIP car where only Tony Rezko, Chris Kelly, John Wyma and Lon Monk and a couple of other rich millionaires are allowed to board.)
(And the Gov has a switch that allows him to cut off and leave behind all the cars except his if he feels like it — no matter what you paid — because ultimately it’s all about him and his train.)
The good news is that he train is running out of track…
Comment by The G Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 2:19 pm
The Lobbyist Limousine,
That Big Tin-thing on Rails,
The Old State Capitol’s Last-Gasp Express
Where’s the Bike Trail Liner,
Capitol City Cronies Transit,
Deals on Wheels,
AllKids, AllFamilies, AllPeople Moving Out of Illinois, away from the bills from all the pork.
Pork Barrel Escape
Hot Rod’s Pockets-Liner
CMSWants2RunMe2 - can’t tell you what the schedule is though…..
Comment by BBishere2 Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 2:30 pm
Empty or “MT” for short
Comment by BIG R.PH Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 3:30 pm
Slip ‘n Slide express
Comment by state worker #1 Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 8:40 pm
“The Cornjerkers” are from Hoopeston, not Paxton Buckly Loda…PBL is the Panthers. Speaking of bad nicknames, don’t forget the Fischer Bunnies….
Comment by anon Monday, Jul 10, 06 @ 9:02 pm