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* Scott Reeder’s latest column includes an item about which pets would be most compatible with some Illinois politicos…
– Dick Durbin: A golden retriever because they are friendly, loyal and smart.
– George Ryan: An English bulldog, they look grumpy but are sweethearts and they are loyal — sometimes to those undeserving of it.
– Rod Blagojevich: A Rottweiler because a rotte digs in its heels and refuses to let go of whatever is in its teeth, no matter how senseless or worthless such action may be.
* The Question: Which pets should Illinois politicians choose for themselves? Explain fully.
posted by Rich Miller
Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:18 am
Sorry, comments are closed at this time.
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Blago: A kitty. No explanation necessary.
Comment by wordslinger Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:27 am
I think they should all get snakes. Because they are slimy, slinky, and always looking for a way out. They attack the vulnerable and they never regret what they have done.
Comment by Boscobud Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:28 am
Todd Stroger: a hog. Full of pork and beholden to William Beaves, the hog with the big nuts.
Comment by Ravenswood Right Winger Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:30 am
Jim Oberweis should buy himself a hamster and a gold studded wheel.
Comment by ZC Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:37 am
a sheepdog for Speaker Madigan, who always has to bring the strays back into line and keep the herd heading in the same direction.
Comment by Capitol View Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:43 am
Pet rocks all around.
I’ll deliver them personally.
Comment by VanillaMan Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:47 am
A donkey by any other name would smell as fetid…also elephants.
Comment by Chanson Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 11:02 am
Perhaps Da Mayor should get him a little goldfish. They don’t make a lot of noise.
Comment by Levois Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 11:17 am
Large Tropical Parrots for everyone. That way Reps and Senators, instead of having to walk to thier respective chambers to debate, would simply perch the parrots on each desk and let them randomly spout off talking points.
“Raaawt! Con Con Bad, Getting things done for people!”
Comment by Speaking At Will Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 11:18 am
It is an insult to kitties everywhere to be assigned to the Gov.
A hedgehog would seem to be more representative because their quills can penetrate skin and have been known to spread germs that can cause fever, stomach pain and a rash.
I know I suffer from those symptoms when exposed to the Gov’s policies.
Comment by Plutocrat03 Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 11:26 am
Doctor Doolittle’s “Pushmi-Pullyu” for the Governor and Speaker. In the original book, this animal was a two-headed antelope. When it tries to move, both heads try to go in opposite directions.
Comment by Six Degrees of Separation Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 12:04 pm
The Gov should pick any pet that is spineless!
Comment by Anonymous Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 12:21 pm
What is Scott Reeder smoking? “Golden Retriever”????? Gimme a break.
Comment by Anonymous Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 12:30 pm
For Emil Jones, any ‘ol type of lapdog will do.
Comment by Jechislo Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 12:35 pm
I thought this was hilarious!
Woof!
Comment by Smitty Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 12:35 pm
I don’t think Rottweiler-Blagojavich. I think yappie Yorkie Poo-Blagojavich.
Comment by LEFTY Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 12:46 pm
Following up on Lefty’s comments –
I also disagree on the Blago/Rott combo. I’ve been around a few Rotts [never owned one secondary to the “can’t own a dog that could take me in a fight” rule]. When well trained, they are kind and gentle. They are fierce only when fierce is needed.
Blago is more of a Pomeranian. He spends a lot of time yapping, usually for no purpose at all. Tends to get in the way when work needs to be done. Nobody takes him all that seriously. Still, he can get in a good nip which does more damage than you might expect. Plus, they have fluffy hair.
Comment by Skeeter Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 1:07 pm
A jellyfish for all rank and file legislators. No backbone.
Comment by Oak Parker Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 1:22 pm
All are gerbils.
Comment by Wumpus Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 2:47 pm
For Mayor Daley, a Pekingese. Whenever a Pekingese gets excited they make a really high-pitched yipping sound, just like the Mayor.
For Emil Jones, an English Bulldog. Whenever Senator Jones is happy, he still looks like he is mad - just like a Bulldog.
For Tom Cross, a Bloodhound. A bloodhound looks like he is asleep 95% of the time, much like Mr. Cross. A more exciting politician has not been invented. I pray, oh I pray he doesn’t run for Governor. If he does, the debates will be used in sleepless clinics across the country.
Comment by trafficmatt Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 3:27 pm
Madigan already has about 66 pet mushrooms…soon to be 69.
Isn’t Emil already the Governor’s pet? He’s loyal and will do anything to please him.
The pasture gate broke in the Senate and there are two herds running wild.
Comment by 4% Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 4:26 pm
“Mike Boland: A miniature poodle who endlessly struts around looking for everyone’s attention.”
Funniest thing I’ve heard in some time!
Comment by Huntingwithaswitch Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 4:43 pm
Blagojevich: I like the idea of the Pomeranian for the same reasons. Causes little more than noise and confusion without really lending much at all to society.
Mike Madigan: A German Shepherd. Often appears noble and loyal - especially to close family and friends. But you never know. Can snap into vicious attack dog at a moments notice leaving all around startled and unable to fully ever trust him.
Emil Jones: Old bloodhound. The kind that doesn’t really seem to do much or to care. Just content to ride out the times and see what tomorrow offers.
Jack Franks/John Fritchey: Collie…. “…what’s that Lassie?!…you say there’s corruption at the Capitol?… that’s horrible…. maybe us adults should run in and do something about it!… good dog, Lassie!”
Tom Cross: Jack Russell Terrier. Prone to chasing his own tale, making lots of racket without really causing much damage.
Frank Watson: Labrador Retriever. Likes guns and the country. Very loud - bordering on annoying - bark and very protective of those he cares about. Loyal to a fault. Too friendly to be scary unless backed into a corner and really threatened.
Dan Rutherford: Border Collie. A bundle of ferocious energy working exceptionally hard at whatever it is he finds important at the moment, but often leaving others wondering what direction he will go in next.
Mayor Daley: mutt from the pound. So thankful to have a boss, he’ll do anything to please him and love doing it without any questions asked.
Pat Quinn: Show-dog reject (any breed). Chip-on his shoulder about not being good enough or “the big dog” and flails about continuously to compensate.
Terry Link: Poodle. Not really good for much but likes to look pretty.
Dick Durbin: Doberman. Little upstairs, but very trainable. Able to appear loyal while looking at you, all the while wondering the most efficient way to attack you from behind when you least expect it.
I could go into some others a pitbull seems appropriate for, but too much could go wrong with the intended sarcasm. So I’ll stop here.
Comment by Amuzing Myself Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 4:45 pm
Blago - A Weasel, just look at the picture of him here, http://democraticgovernors.org/advance/1779/gov-rod-blagojevich-health-benefits-for-service-men-women .
It’s similar too one ABC 7 runs most every time they talk about him.
Comment by Concerned Voter Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 8:23 pm
Blagojevich: Greyhound. Runs real well (in settings with questionable financial transactions), but he’s unable to do anything useful once the race is over.
Comment by Boone Logan Square Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 10:47 pm
Blago: Bichon Frise.
Noisy and unpredictable.
Quinn: Saint Bernard.
Lumbering but strong, dependable.
Alexi: Afghan Hound.
Smart, graceful and gorgeous.
Dan Hynes: Beagle.
Loyal, hardworking but very average.
Lisa Madigan: Dalmation.
Highly adaptive but unpredictable.
Jesse White:Basset Hound.
Droopy and lovable.
Comment by Monrovian Maltese Monday, Nov 17, 08 @ 11:44 pm