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* From a press release sent last night…
“Throughout her years in public office, Attorney General Lisa Madigan has proven herself to be capable, conscientious, and committed to the best interests of the people of Illinois. She has done a fine job as ‘the people’s lawyer.’ I look forward to working alongside her in our common cause of providing strong, responsible, honest government for the people of Illinois. “
This ought to be the Question of the Day, but what do you think he really wanted to write?
Snark heavily encouraged.
posted by Rich Miller
Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:24 am
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Good Lord my intimidation by this woman is now over!
Comment by mac Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:28 am
I know its a bit off the topic but did Quinn and Cross meet yesterday and how did that go if so?
Comment by Idontgetit Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:34 am
You mean I have to keep this job?
Comment by Anon Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:41 am
Quinn: “Now how do I get out of the freakin mess”???
Comment by Dan S, a voter and Cubs Fan Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:42 am
And, since she is so competent and capable, and needs little help in doing her job, I am going to line-item veto everything out of the Attorney General’s office appropriations, as we continue our shared sacrices to correct the dire fiscal situation that our state is in.
Comment by Balance Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:49 am
wooh! hooh! I actually have a chance at winning the next election now that Lisa is not running for Governor!
Comment by South Side Pride Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:49 am
“Throughout her years in public office, Attorney General Lisa Madigan has proven herself to be competent, connected, and committed to kicking my butt in 2010 in Illinois. She has done a fine job as the “people’s lawyer” so the public was going to join her in kicking my butt in 2010. I certainly don’t look forward to working with her on one side of me and her dad on the other side of me, but hey, at least I think I’ve got a shot now to be governor again!
Comment by jbird Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:54 am
“That’s all fine, Lisa, but what does your daddy have to say about this?”
Comment by anon Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 7:58 am
“I appreciate Lisa’s decision because it considerably improves the odds for my election next year.”
Comment by reformer Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:00 am
I’m pleased to see that Attorney General Madigan has finally roused herself to an adequate state of consciousness and deigned to inform The Little People that she doesn’t have the stomach to go toe-to-toe with The Big Fella, my affectionate nickname for myself.
During my time as governor, I’ve known her to be the Stone in My Shoe, the Fly in My Soup, the Stick in My Eye. I now look forward to ignoring her publicly while ridiculing her privately for many years.
And as I continue to serve the people of Illinois as their Accidental Governor, I can assure them that with this announcement, I feel inspired to reach out my hands to her vertically challenged father.
I will take hose meaty hands, which I like to call Brian Boru and John L. Sullivan, wrap them around his apple-eating, Leprechaun neck, and shake him until that pot of gold he’s been hoarding falls out of his tiny well-tailored pockets. I’ll also make him pass a resolution naming me Illinois’ King of the Celts.
Comment by wordslinger Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:03 am
Quinn: “OMG! this is my lucky day, I am going to buy a lottery ticket”
Comment by Ghost Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:05 am
In my ongoing efforts to return Illinois to glory, I am thrilled that there is one less roadblock to my reelection. I have shown that I can’t get along with the Legislature and I am hopeful that the AG will remain on the sidelines during the budget negotiations. The less people I have to negotiate with the easier it will be for me to get my way, as soon as I figure out what I want.
Comment by bourbonrich Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:06 am
“Yes! it all me, yeah! Uh, Um, wait, so, will the Illinois Dem organizations help me win or has Madigan decided to give me what I wanted without what I need.”
Comment by annon Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:18 am
Look at me - I’m invincible! Not even LMadigan will take me on! Who’s next? C’mon, put up your dukes! I’ll murdalize ya! Nyuk, nyuk nyuk.
Comment by dupage dan Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:24 am
Quinn:”She’s not running for Governor? What’s the speaker up to now?”
Comment by casual observer Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:25 am
Throughout her years in public office, Attorney General Lisa Madigan has confounded tinfoil hat conspiracy theorists like myself, including, most recently, the Chicago Tribune and Chicago Sun-Times editorial boards, who blamed her indirectly for the budget stalemate.
Lisa Madigan’s announcement that she will not seek higher office is just the latest Machiavellian move by her father, a.k.a. The Puppetmaster. By *supposedly* denying any ambition for higher office, the attorney general is merely the latest pawn in her father’s political game. Here is His Plan:
- Either raise taxes or slash services, or both, and blame me for the outcome.
- Either support the election of Dan Hynes for Governor, or Kirk Dillard, or both, and oust a True Reformer and Straightshooter from the Governor’s mansion.
- Following redistricting, either step down as Speaker and Party Chairman, or remain in power, or both, and elect Lisa governor in 2014.
- Following her election as one of the few women to ever lead a large state, Lisa runs for President in 2016, or 2020, or both.
- Force my longtime friend Mr. Filan into retirement.
Comment by Yellow Dog Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:29 am
From the Wizard of Oz…
Oh I do believe in miracles, oh I do I do I do.
Comment by Commonsense in Illinois Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:29 am
“I now have a good shot at being Governor again, and if I butter up Lisa maybe she will give me some support”
This morning on WGN radio Gregg Jarrett had Lisa Madigan on and asked her if she was planning on adding to her family….she first laughed and said no one has ever asked her that before then said two is enough.
Comment by Third Generation Chicago Native Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:41 am
Christmas in July always makes this look such a lovely time of year.
Comment by Baines 4 Prez Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:42 am
He is probably happy to have been able to write just what he did write (or have written for him).
Comment by Captain Flume Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:43 am
“Wait, I am the SubGuv. I need to vanquish the Attorney General to be credible. Now I am dened the chance. She has won the ‘10 election and I am left with 50 cents in my fund and all the Blagoofers giving me the flip flop advice. How can get out of here? Please let me go back to Sunday mornings, a nice Starbucks and a presser.”
Comment by CircularFiringSquad Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:43 am
I appreciate that the Madigan’s realize that no amount of politics is going to get a tax increase this year, so the next governor will have that burden to bear…therefore, Lisa will sit this one out so as not to have that tax noose around her neck. To the citizens of Illinois…I say “Let Them Eat Cake!”
Comment by Double Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:44 am
Dirty Lisa Callahan (after walking across the street while finishing her lunch and looking down while pointing at PQ on the ground): “To tell you the truth, in all the confusion I can’t remember exactly what I said I would do. Go ahead, make my day.”
PQ: “I gots to know.”
DLC: “Click.” Smiles and walks away.
PQ: “$@#*& !”
Comment by zatoichi Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:47 am
Matt 24:11 “Many false prophets will arise and will mislead many.”
Comment by MrJM Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:52 am
“I told you she wouldn’t get in the GAME, I TOLD YOU!–Pat Quinn 3 seconds after hearing the news.
Comment by He Makes Ryan Look Like a Saint Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:53 am
Quinn: “Perhaps Lisa knows something I don’t.”
Comment by Louis Howe Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:54 am
Quinn: Leave it to a woman not to be able to make up her mind within a reasonable amount of time. Poor Dan Hynd has to have been doing “a slow-burn”. How many of Dan’s supporters already gave their financial contributions to other candidates while Lisa played the role of a dead possum? Wonder what little Mikey thinks of her decision? I wonder if she makes her husband go to the mall with her when she goes to try on shoes? Now I know why I stay single.
Now, the road is cleared for me to become the Grand Pooh-Pah! Poor Joe Birkett. He has to have a migraine headache this morning. Wonder if Joe will attack her on the issue of why she remained silent as attorney-general while Rod and his cronies looted & scooted under her watch? Naah, she is bullet-proof regardless of what she failed to do. Thank goodness Joe has to deal with her now rather than me. Now, I only have to deal with her obstinate old man. Whew!
Comment by John Doe Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 8:59 am
Quinn: I wonder if Lisa and Sarah Palin have been talking and sharing notes? Something smells “fishy” here and it isn’t Todd’s catch. What are they hatching up together? Is it some type of conspiracy that she and her old man have devised to get rid of me? They are trying to make me see this as an opportinity when it is really adversity that they are laying at my feet. It is a Trojan Horse! I knew it! My God, what should I do now? Somebody find Mayor Daley for me quick!
Comment by John Doe Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 9:11 am
But a few words now about her father, the Speaker of Doom…..
Comment by Amy Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 9:12 am
“YEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAWWWWWWW!!!!!”
Comment by Boone Logan Square Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 9:23 am
Whew! But now I’m really on her dad’s bad side. last week he held a press conference and called me out. he called me a flip-flopper,and said that I was losing my credibility with legislators. gotta rethink my angles here. maybe I can rescind filan’s contract (flip-flop point # 5 per mike madigan)to make some amends? or maybe I better accept a temporary budget, give legislators the time that they need/want and keep my mouth shut from here on out?
Comment by Will County Woman Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 9:29 am
sorry rich, my post is perhaps more of what pat quinn was/is thinking as opposed to what he really wanted to write. i do know how to follow instructions, but…
Comment by Will County Woman Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 9:37 am
“Uh, oh. Now what?”
Comment by David Ormsby Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 9:38 am
Is this a great country, or what? Where somebody with very little administrative ability or experience, disliked by the establishment, wooden and disorganized public speaker, can just bull his way to being top executive in a big state, and now maybe even stay there for another term. I have a good heart and good intentions, and the People recognize that. Nobody will ever accuse me of being a slick blow dried pretty boy!
Comment by jake Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 10:38 am
Gee I hope the unfinished business she’s talking about isn’t me and my office and the stuff my blago holdovers have been doing.
Comment by A Citizen Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 11:00 am
Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Hallelujah?
Comment by Cheswick Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 11:17 am
“Throughout her years in public office, Attorney General Lisa Madigan has proven herself to be capable, conscientious, and committed to the best interests of the people of Illinois. She has done a fine job as ‘the people’s lawyer.’ I look forward to working alongside her in our common cause of providing strong, responsible, honest government for the people of Illinois. “
“Is that ok, Mr. Speaker? Is there anything you need me to add? Is it strong enough?”
Comment by HoosierDaddy Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 1:37 pm
I always knew that she feared me. For I am GadFly!
Comment by Ill_will Thursday, Jul 9, 09 @ 10:03 pm