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* Dana Millbank has a marvelous column in the Atlantic this month, wherein he “translates” DC Political Speak for us. Here are a few examples…
I don’t pay attention to the polls.
My job-approval rating is 32 percent.Frankly …
The following statement is false.You are either with us or against us.
You are against us.I hope we can work together in a bipartisan way.
I need to pick off one senator from the other party to pass this bill.This should not be a political issue.
My party has a winning political issue.It’s time to stop playing politics.
The other party has a winning political issue.
* Question: How about some Springfield Political Speak translations?
Have fun.
posted by Rich Miller
Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:26 am
Sorry, comments are closed at this time.
Previous Post: No way to run a railroad *** UPDATED X1 ***
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“Today was an up day” - I don’t have any ties left to reality
“I’m on the side of the Lord” - And I’m hoping he’s in the jury pool
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:28 am
“Hold your nose and enjoy a free bus ride”
“Please don’t say that. Please, Please please!! This is my one pipe dream that I’ve been able to force down Illinois’ gullet, and I’d like to enjoy the moment”
Comment by dan l Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:31 am
My favorite quote is the “its a win-win situation” saying.- Its good for me, the politician/official, and my voters, at least in theory.
Mayor Daley says it a lot.
Comment by pickles!! Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:34 am
“I didn’t (give in). I vetoed it. I rewrote the bill,”
There is absolutely nothing that I can’t say with a straight face, no matter how untrue it is
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:36 am
“Mr. Speaker, I move the previous question.”
Translated: “Can’t you make these morons shut up?”
Comment by wordslinger Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:37 am
Blago: “I vetoed the tax hike”
Clinton “I did not have sex with that woman”(Monica)
Comment by MOON Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:38 am
It’s too bad I don’t know enough about Springfield.
Comment by Levois Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:39 am
“You need to work with the legislators”
- Where’s my pork!?
Comment by GoBearsss Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:44 am
“Someone needs to step up and show some leadership”
- Don’t look at me, I just work here
Comment by GoBearsss Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:45 am
“The Regular Session of the 95th General Assembly is adjourned until tomorrow, 10 AM”
- Meet at Boone’s in 10 minutes
“The Regular Session of the 95th General Assembly is adjourned until tomorrow, 2 PM”
- I’m buying
Comment by GoBearsss Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:47 am
“Let me finish these other questions, Ray, and I’ll get back to your subpoena question.”
- I’m gonna make a dash for it in five, four, three….
Comment by Rich Miller Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:48 am
“WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!”
- Please sit down with me for an intelligent conversation about your policies and how you plan to move this state forward. Our readers in Rockford are very interest, thank you.”
Comment by GoBearsss Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:51 am
“With all due respect…”
- “I don’t believe a word you just said.”
“What was she thinking?”
-”What was I thinking.”
Any reference to sexism or Neanderthal mentality while defending your wife -
Guilty
Comment by If It Walks Like a Duck... Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:53 am
“The governor is not Public Official A.”
- I hope nobody notices that George Ryan’s press secretary said the same thing.
Comment by Rich Miller Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 10:56 am
The guv is unavailable for comment.
The guv is home watching Hannah Montana episodes on a complete dvd collection. He may reappear in the spring.
Comment by A Citizen Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:00 am
“No such conversation took place.”
Trans: “I hope he wasn’t wearing a wire.”
——-
Comment by wordslinger Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:01 am
“My dog misses me!”
- please, for the love of god let me go home!
(in honor of Bill Black)
Comment by GoBearsss Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:03 am
“We are cooperating fully with the U.S. Attorney. Because it’s an ongoing conversation, we will have to other comment.”
Trans: ‘Everybody keep their mouths shut.”
Comment by wordslinger Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:03 am
“I’m doing the People’s business.”
As in friends and family.
Comment by The 'Broken Heart' of Rogers Park Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:11 am
“I’m helping people” = I’ll do it the way I want I don’t care what the Constitution or the statutes say.
Comment by Dan S, a Voter Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:14 am
“Where is the love?”
– “What’s in it for me?”
Comment by Marty S says Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:14 am
‘Keep your powder dry’
That was Pate’s comment whenever he had not yet decided what angle to take and wanted members to shut up until he did decide.
Comment by GOP Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:15 am
“Representative, I’d be happy to work with you on that issue in the future.”
Shut up already so we can vote on my bill.
“Mr. Speaker, Inquiry of the chair”
I’m about to screw with you.
Comment by speakkk Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:18 am
“This bill having received the required constituional majority is declared passed”.
Illinois’ citizens just got screwed again.
Comment by Jaded Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:23 am
“I’ve got testicular virility”
- Instead of brains
Comment by Bluefish Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:26 am
“Free bus rides for all seniors!”
“What’s this “no free lunch thing” everyone keeps talking about?”
Comment by If It Walks Like a Duck... Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:27 am
“The Speaker will have a press conference in ten minutes.”
- Dorothy, wake up!
Comment by Rich Miller Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:28 am
“Family is very important to me”
Unless you are talking about my father-in-law.
“He is a man of the people”
He will pander to whomever is listening to ensure that he is reelected.
“Illinois should do its part to reduce global warming”
Fuel up the state plane so we can spread this message from Chicago to Cairo.
Comment by Jake from Elwood Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:45 am
“All in all, it was a good day”
Translation: Your favored legislation won the coveted “100 votes against” award in the IL House.
There’s a name for the award but it escapes me now.
Comment by Six Degrees of Separation Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:47 am
I am retiring to spend more time with my family.
If I quit now, maybe they’ll stop investigating.
Comment by Reading on Walden Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:50 am
===There’s a name for the award but it escapes me now.===
Century Club.
Comment by Rich Miller Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 11:51 am
“Have all voted who wish?”
Time to start voting
“I rise on a point of personal privilege”
Hurry, get the cameras. This will be a great photo op with my constituents
“Mr. Speaker, I’d like to put this bill on the order of postponed consideration.”
What the —?
Comment by Just Sayin' Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:18 pm
“The gentleman from Cook, Mr. Lang is recognized.”
- It must be about time for the Chicago TV live shots.
Comment by Rich Miller Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:21 pm
“I’m working hard for the people.”
The “people” who give me campaign donations, the “people” who write my daughters very generous birthday checks, the “people” who pay my wife healthy real estate commissions….
Comment by S. Illinois Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:25 pm
During a fly-around that also included a stop in Decatur, the governor said senior citizens in Illinois may “pre-register” for free transit service by calling (800) 252-8966 or going online to www.illinois.gov/transit.
Great, another chance to get people to go to my website and see all the B.S. I’ve put on about the good things I’ve done for this state.
Comment by Just My Opinion Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:28 pm
Rod: “I’m here to serve the people”
Means: “Where the hell is my hairbrush!!”
Comment by Anonymous Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:33 pm
“This will be on the order of short debate.”
Do we really have to talk about this again?
“I would like to request a verification.”
Take a walk or pay in the election
Comment by Just Sayin' Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:36 pm
“Let me take a look at it.”
Translation - I don’t care about your issue right now the Rathskellar just popped some fresh popcorn.
“I’m with ya!”
Translation - I’m with you right now - but that is subject to change when it gets to committee or on the floor.
“Who are the opponents?”
Translation - Let me check my D-2’s to determine who is going to get my support.
Comment by Lobby101 Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:39 pm
“That was the OLD way of doing business”=
“I switched the illegal campaign contributions to Quickbooks”
“I remember my honest, hard-working, middle-class parents”-
(I never wanted to be like them).
“…because its the right thing to do”-
=”This polled well”.
“It’s the LAW, L-.A.-W.”
=”At least, that’s what my borrowed crib notes from Pepperdine said, I was out surfing with Lon”
“Ethically, we’re clean as a hound’s tooth”
-I bought a brand new shredder last week.
Comment by Keef Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:39 pm
“Copyrighted Material, Do Not Forward”
- I know you’re gonna forward it, but please try to keep the copyright violations to a bare minimum, please.
Comment by Rich Miller Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:40 pm
Rich - I have to admit, I have seen the following e-mail subject line on at least two occasions:
“FW: FW: FW: COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL DO NOT FORWARD”
Only when someone wanted to send something of particular interest to me. And then I came to your blog, felt guilty, and clicked on the ads.
:)
Comment by GoBearsss Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 12:49 pm
“We can do this the hard way or we can do this the easy way”
You Republicans, please sit down and be quiet. You don’t have the votes and I have the gavel.
Comment by QC Transplant Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 1:17 pm
“the hour of 10 having arrived the Senate will come to order” — This really means it is some time well after 10 am.
Comment by Poli-Sci Geek Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 1:33 pm
“Speaker Madigan in the Chair”
Pay attention something good (interesting) is about to happen.
“Nice Tie”
(sorry, can’t translate this due to the no profanity rule)
“Senate Bills X,Y, and Z are being assigned to subcommittee”
Seante Bill X,Y, and Z are dead as a door nail.
Comment by Jaded Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 1:46 pm
“I have something I need to discuss with you off campus”
I have an upcoming fundraiser.
Comment by Jaded Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 1:50 pm
“The Rules Committee will convene immediately in the antechamber”
- Shots!
Comment by GoBearsss Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 1:57 pm
Education is my top priority -
unless I have to rasie taxes to pay for it.
Comment by capitol view Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 1:59 pm
“The Democrats will caucus in five minutes.”
– Time for me to let you all know who will vote for and who I will excuse from voting for a controversial bill.
Comment by The Speaker says Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 2:04 pm
“we would be happy to provide you our methodology for that fiscal analysis”
“yeah, extrapolate this, ya putz”
Comment by Stella the Snark Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 2:33 pm
“Yes”
No
“No”
Maybe, what’s in it for me.
“Never”
(See above)
Comment by BehindTheScenes Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 2:49 pm
“I’m going to put an end to business as usual in Springfield!”
Except for some “very serious allegations of endemic hiring fraud”
“You want to meet over lunch?”
Nothing happening here today, let’s go to the Sangamo for a couple hours.
Comment by Napoleon has left the building Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 3:01 pm
“This is a common-sense proposal”
-Look, I’ve convinced the general public this is a good idea, so don’t bother talking about the details, or people might actually realize how truly invasive this legislation is, how it punishes people it shouldn’t, and that it won’t accomplish anything I claim it will. (Generally refers to anti-gun legislation, but also applied to other issues with alarming regularity.)
Comment by Another Pro-gunner Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 3:22 pm
You must pay to play - When and how large was your last contribution.
Comment by Hickory Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 3:32 pm
“the worst thing you can do….is add more burdens to people and raise more taxes on people”
really means….
“I’m going to increase every business fee, user fee, license fee, sales tax, and any other fee that I can think of. And people will not notice any burdon”
Comment by fee man Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 3:46 pm
“Inquiry of the parliamentarian”
— At least explain to me how you’re going to screw me over?
“Have all voted that wish, have all voted that wish”
— Wake up! We’re voting
“Move to override the chair”
— I’m powerless to do anything so I’m going to throw a fit and waste some time
“Senate Republicans request an immediate caucus”
— There’s finally a phone booth open
“I’ll have to look into that and get back to you”
— You’ll never hear from the governor’s press office again
“That’s just Democrats being Democrats”
— I hate Rod Blagojevich and curse his existence
“The gentlemen from Madison, Representative Hoffman, for what reason do you rise?”
— Would Rep. Bradford have really been that bad?
“Roll call for attendance”
— Push the green button or you don’t get your meal money
“My name was used in debate …”
— And I like hearing it so much I’m going to get up and talk some more
Comment by Michelle Flaherty Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 4:37 pm
“…To the bill.”
-Forget all that crap I just said.
“The Chair recognizes the gentleman from Vermillion.”
-Sit down because this will get interesting.
“Where’s the fiscal note on this bill?”
-Tell me how much you’re raising our taxes this time.
“Voting is now open.”
-It really isn’t “open”, we decided this in caucus.
“I thank my colleague on the other side for his/her hard work.”
-He/she is a schmuck but you don’t say schmuck on the floor.
Comment by jwscott72 Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 4:57 pm
“I used my veto to improve the bill” =
I waited until the last possible minute to make unneccessary changes in the hopes that my unconstitutional action will throw the process into dissary and I can once agin blame the legislature. Ahhh, the smell of victory.
Comment by L.S. Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 5:33 pm
“Pony girl”
A young lady who keeps her job with her tail.
Compliments of the musical “Boss” by Mike Royko.
I’m told they were sweet young things hired by Illinois Bell to entertain legislators.
Comment by Cal Skinner Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 5:36 pm
“The governor has not been accused of any wrongdoing.”
-Not yet, he hasn’t.
Comment by Arthur Andersen Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 5:52 pm
Hi there!
To a voter: Vote for me!
To a fellow legislator: Vote with me!
To the press: Be kind, please.
Comment by Annonymous Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 6:07 pm
“Mr. President the Republicans request a caucus.” (Righter needs to haul the gang in a room and explain again that they have no power).
Comment by Right On Bill Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 6:29 pm
Our friends want this bill.
–The people at the mobbed-up operation that gave me $75,000 during the last cycle are insisting that this bill pass, and if it doesn’t, somebody is going to wind up like Jimmy Hoffa.
Excuse me, will the kind gentleman tell me what part of the bill he is referring to?
–I don’t remember what happened after I closed the Alamo last night.
The speaker would like…
–You had better…
Comment by Quizzical Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 7:23 pm
Here’s a “back in the day” classic:
“we’re on break”
-how many tickets are you gonna buy/sell/eat?
Comment by Arthur Andersen Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 7:35 pm
“I’m just a retired businessman, living on a pension.”
Translation: Pssst! Here’s hoping the Pope can remember his line.
(With apologies to “The Godfather.”)
Comment by Disgusted Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 7:50 pm
“The governor has not been accused of any wrongdoing”
Unless you count this article
Comment by Just Sayin' Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 7:59 pm
It’s not business as usual!
Trans: When I get done they won’t even recognize business as usual.
Comment by Thinking without the box Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 8:01 pm
“Send it to Taylorville”
Send your contribution the chairman of the Dem county chairs and it will get to your candidate without looking like you sent it.
Comment by St. Nick Tuesday, Jan 22, 08 @ 8:49 pm