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Question of the day
Friday, Apr 9, 2010 - Posted by Rich Miller * It’s Friday, so let’s lighten things up. The photo is of Green Party gubernatorial candidate Rich Whitney on a park bench appearing to talk to a statue of Abe Lincoln…  * The Question: Caption?
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- Scooby - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 12:44 pm:
I’m this color because I’m a statue, but why do you look like Grimace?
- disgusted in chi boogie - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 12:44 pm:
Are you still registered to vote here? That’ll make two…
- Name/Nickname/Anon - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 12:48 pm:
Mr. Lincoln, I really need your vote. It may be one of the few I can get. By the way, you are registered to vote, aren’t you?
- BusMan - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 12:49 pm:
No one else will listen to me so I have to talk to statues
- Small Town Liberal - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 12:50 pm:
But Abe, what I don’t get is why you didn’t try to take on more than just the South. Wouldn’t it have been more satisfying to lose a truly magnificent fight than to win the Civil War?
- Don't Worry, Be Happy - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:01 pm:
I appreciate that a few drops from the oil can would loosen your joints, but you have to understand that oil is a non-renewable resource contributing to global warming and international destabilization and terrorism.
I’d be happy to hook you up to a windmill or a solar panel if you think that might help your rust problem.
- zatoichi - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:01 pm:
Yeah I know, but purple is Prince’s favorite color.
- liblab - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:04 pm:
I coulda been a contender.
- OneMan - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:05 pm:
Abe informed Rich that he had spoken to God and he is a little ticked about the lawsuit
- Phineas J. Whoopee - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:07 pm:
Abe, when you said in your Gettysburg address,
“that we here
highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain;
that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of
freedom; and that government of the people, by the people,
for the people, shall not perish from the earth.”
exactly what did you mean by “under God”. Apparently, you have never read the Constitution. I’m taking you to court.
- lincolnlover - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:11 pm:
So yer sayin’ you thot up that whole “of the people by the people” thing in the shower?
- Hisgirlfriday - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:14 pm:
All right, I concede you’ve got the better tie, but I’ve got the better beard.
- David Ormsby - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:16 pm:
“Abe? Are you listening to me?”
- George - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:21 pm:
I remember seeing a similar photo of him on that bench with Abe 4 years ago.
Has he been there the whole time? Would explain a lot.
- Ramsin - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:25 pm:
I think Scooby won this one right out of the gate. Grimace.
- South Side Mike - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:29 pm:
Abe: “I never thought I would find a situation less desirable than being covered in pigeon droppings until now.”
or
“Having to sit here and listen to this clown makes me wish Douglas had won.”
- siriusly - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:41 pm:
What do you mean you’re not real?
You’ve been dead since 1865? What the heck man?
All that advice you’ve been giving me about my style and Lt. Governor candidates is all made up hallucinations?
- dupage dan - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 1:53 pm:
Well, that’s enough for me - where do I vote for this guy? I am transfixed by his gubernatorial presence. Either that or I’m bronze.
- Obamarama - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 2:12 pm:
If Whitney is in the photo, who is left on staff to take the picture?
- siriusly - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 2:29 pm:
“Abe, I’m telling you they were this big. Yes, on the Chicago Republican website. No, I’m not kidding there really is a Chicago Republican website”
- The Mad Hatter - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 2:33 pm:
Where’s Mine?
- Anonymous - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 2:36 pm:
Help me help you help me……..
- PFK - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 2:50 pm:
Just wait here, and if a woman named Monique pulls up in a van and offers you a ride, I want you to use that pepper spray I gave you
- Vote Quimby! - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 3:14 pm:
I thought I had to rub your nose for good luck…
- VanillaMan - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 3:16 pm:
Whitney: “So, do you think I can get lucky this year?”
Lincoln: “If you want luck this year, mount a mule backwards and ride one mile on him holding a bag of eggs in one hand, and a bag of salt in the other - without falling off.”
Whitney: “Uh - a mule? No, what I mean is, do you think voters will love me this year?”
Lincoln: “If you want true love, swallow chicken hearts. Have you had a bird hop into your house, or land on your window ledge? You know if you did, that would be bad luck.”
Whitney: “Uh - no, I didn’t know that.”
Lincoln: “Did you start campaigning of a Friday?”
Whitney: “I don’t remember, I don’t think I did - why?”
Lincoln: “Because it is always bad luck to start anything on a Friday, especially planting or harvesting. Did you plant your potatoes in the moonlight?”
Whitney: “Weren’t you the guy who had all those awesome famous sayings like, “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt?” How about some of that advice for me?”
Lincoln: “OK. Have you heard this one? “Asking a statue for advice is like marrying a scarecrow for the corncobs.”
Whitney: “You were raised a Hoosier weren’t you?”
- charisma - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 3:19 pm:
If only I had the statue’s charisma!
- pothole - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 3:33 pm:
Whitney: “How about an endorsement?”
Lincoln: “Only if you’ll pledge to stop calling Illinois the Land of Lincoln. Please move me to Indiana or Kentucky.”
- Moving to Oklahoma - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 3:57 pm:
Abe: “yeah, yeah, green party, yeah, I got it, but, hey, lemme ask ya, do those Snuggie things really build up alot of static electricity?”
- 47th Ward - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 4:00 pm:
Yes, it’s called the Green Party. Seriously. And no, I don’t think we would have taken votes from Douglas, so you still would have lost that Senate race.
- InParis - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 4:11 pm:
And then the carbon went up into the sky, and it got warmer, and warmer, and…….
- south of chi - Friday, Apr 9, 10 @ 4:17 pm:
Whitney, having no actual business to conduct in Springfield, poses with a statue as any tourist would.
- wordslinger63@gmail.com - Saturday, Apr 10, 10 @ 10:23 am:
“Little Red Corvette — baby, you move too fast.”
- just sayin' - Saturday, Apr 10, 10 @ 12:52 pm:
“But other than that, how did you like the play Mr. Lincoln?”
[What, too soon?]
- Anonymous - Sunday, Apr 11, 10 @ 1:46 am:
Two Non-Democrats Who Both Helped Start a New Party
- Squideshi - Sunday, Apr 11, 10 @ 1:48 am:
The statue of Whitney is far more realistic than the statue of Lincoln, IMHO.