Question of the day
Friday, Jun 18, 2010 - Posted by Rich Miller
* You’ve probably seen this by now. It’s a sign posted in Chicago’s federal courthouse cafeteria advertising a new sandwich…
The sign was quickly changed to delete references to defendant Blagojevich.
* The Question: Can you come up with a more appropriate sandwich name for Rod Blagojevich? Major bonus points for listing the ingredients.
* And here’s your Blagojevich trial roundup…
* Yesterday’s and today’s exhibits
* Judge Zagel to Sam Jr.: “Why do you do this?”: With spectators sitting on the edge of their seats, Zagel gave Adam a tongue-lashing for the judicial equivalent of running his mouth off.
* Judge, defense attorney clash at Blagojevich trial: Sam Adam Jr., whose theatrical courtroom presence is at odds with standard federal court decorum, finally got all the way under Zagel’s skin. And the judge responded by lecturing him in front of the jury and once even ordering jurors from the room so he could make a point with the lawyer outside jurors’ presence.
* Ata Testifies, Adam Challenges, Zagel Comments
* Blagojevich Defense Goes After Cari for Contradictions, Lies
* Witness: Rezko had plan to stop Blagojevich probe
* Ex-Blagojevich staffer tells of clout in hiring
* Donor: No promise of a job
* Blagojevich had strategy to trade campaign cash for state business: witness
* Blago trial sideshows: Witness decked, sandwiches yanked: [Prosecution witness Joseph] Cari landed on his back and then rolled onto his stomach, according to a WGN-Channel 9 video. He was helped up about 40 seconds later.
* Blagojevich witness collides with TV camera
* Blagojevich tapes unearth ex-governor’s methods
* Presidential ambitions
* Blagojevich’s feel-good campaign
* Blago’s lips zipped as trial resumes
- Team America - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 11:52 am:
The “Guilty Governor,” in which the only needed ingredient is ham.
- 47th Ward - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 11:57 am:
The Miloslovic:
Smoked Serbian ham, sour cream and pickled cabbage stuffed into days-old stale and moldy white bread. Served cold, like revenge.
If you’re not a runner before eating one of these, this delicacy is sure to have you running to the toilet. It’ll make you as sick as Rod’s repeated denials.
- 47th Ward - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 11:59 am:
*Milosevic*
- Highland, IL - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:03 pm:
The Elvis Ham Sandwich
- Tom B. - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:05 pm:
The Butt Head. Triple layer bacon (pork), lettuce (cash), yellow mustard (appropriate color for him), too much paprika (makes you wince when you bite into it), limburger cheese (stinks) and white bread soaked in Malort (makes you want to puke).
- And I Approved This Message - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:08 pm:
“The Virility” - prairie oysters and horse…radish on a hot dog bun.
- Levois - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:09 pm:
The Up-Day with turkey, lettuce, tomatoes, swiss cheese and on whole wheat bread. You will have an up day with that sandwich even if you really had a down day.
- Anon - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:10 pm:
The HEALTHY Club - full of Bologna, a bit of peanut butter to help pronounce the blah, some sour kraut to help your stomach turn - all served on scourfordough or lye - sorry Sourdough or Rye. Good for all of us Illinoisians.
- Pat Robertson - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:15 pm:
“The Elvis Impersonator Sandwich”
Peanut Butter
Banana Slices
Baloney
White Bread
Butter outside of bread slices, and grill until brown on each side.
Ubi est meum dipping sauce:
Horse sh-,um, radish
Sour grapes, um, cream
Hard cheese, grating, um, grated
Combine ingredients, stir for 15 to 20 years.
Our waiting staff accepts IOUs.
- El Conquistador - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:15 pm:
The Blago Beignet - It looks good enough until you take a bite and find it’s stuffed with bologna and limburger.
- El Conquistador - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:17 pm:
Of course the price for any of these sandwiches is $25,000 ($1,500 if buying the child-size)
- Wumpus - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:22 pm:
Cheese, ham and corn
comes with a side of Irish Potato Chips-Quinn Chips.
No name yet
- Chubby Cubbie - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:23 pm:
“Clueless Club Sandwich” I don’t recall the ingredients… or the
“F - Bomb Special” …order by stating…”Give us the F_____ Sandwich”
- wordslinger - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:25 pm:
The Testicular Virility: A giant hot dog bun loaded with ham, bologna and yesterday’s tomatoes, smothered in free range BS.
- Ghost - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:26 pm:
Cheesy Ham on Lye
ham
lots and lots of nacho cheese
jalepno with tobasco sauce for explosive reaction
rye bread
A jungle spider as an optional garnish.
cost 25K
- Say WHAT? - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:30 pm:
The Guilty as All Get out Sandwich.
Keep the ingredients the same:
Turkey - Needs no explanation
Swiss Cheese - Full of holes
Pesto Mayo - sneaks up on, kicks you, and the aftertaste won’t leave you alone.
Avacado - slimy, very slimy.
Spinach - To cover up how slimy it really is.
PERFECT!
- Whatever - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:31 pm:
“The F-ing Golden Sub” — ham, tongue and bologna, covered in cheese.
- dupage dan - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:32 pm:
Surf and Turf sandwich.
Made w/Blowfish and Rocky Mountain oysters.
Served on a heel.
- Small Town Liberal - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:33 pm:
The Incarcerated: chipped beef gravy on top of 2 slices of f*#@ing golden wheat bread.
- Vole - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:33 pm:
Horse meat lovers special imported from Mexico and served up by Bo Derek.
- The Bad Wrap - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:40 pm:
Aged salami, horseradish, radicchio, sliced pineapple core, slivered almonds, lots of onions, American cheese wrapped in a tomato tortilla.
- Segatari - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:41 pm:
The Impeached Special
SPAM
waffles
cheese
sour grapes
wine
pork
balonga
- HoosierDaddy - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:42 pm:
The F*ing Golden Boy:
(A Po’Boy substituting ham for roast beef)
We start with one big ham, and slice it really thin; add loads of cheese (Swiss because its full of holes), lots of lettuce (the green stuff, that’s what makes it work, you understand?), serve up on somebody else’s buns, because our A** is not going down for this one; and smother wth lots of gravy… it’s all about the gravy!
- The Blagojevich Bistro - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:43 pm:
“In Rod We Crust”
A hot dog, stuffed with bread.
- Bongo Furry - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:44 pm:
Any fish sandwich would do.
The only fish that get nailed to a wall are the ones that did not keep their mouths shut.
- Dooley Dudright - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:47 pm:
The Soy Boy.
A lumpy lukewarm mash of: soy beans, soy grits, soy flakes (lots of flakes!), soy sauce, tofu, and TVP (textured vegetable protein). Only.
Why? Because under G-Rod, the Dept. of Corrections went over to a (nearly) “all soy, all the time” diet regimen. For which the state now is being sued in federal court.
- Bring Back Boone's - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:50 pm:
The shakedown sub-
Basically an Italian sub with the addition of bologna for obvious reasons.
- South Side Mike - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:50 pm:
Let’s see, for the “Innocence Meal” I would propose:
Sandwich:
Whole Wheat Roll
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Saint-Nectaire Cheese
Both Heavenly Ham and Heavenly Turkey
Honey from the New Carlisle Monastery in Indiana
Baby Spinach
Side: Saint Germain Pea Soup
Drink: “Virgin” Mary
For a “Blagojevich”:
Sandwich:
Choice of waffles or dried out white bread, toasted and spread with “I Can’t Believe It’s Not…” Products
Processed American Cheese Food Product (80% oil)
Uncured Ham
Swiss (defense) cheese
Extra oil & vinegar
Horseradish
Side: Bar of Soap
Drink: Loud-Mouth (peach schnapps & Southern Comfort)
- Anonymous - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:51 pm:
A bit O/T, but we should be careful about the “horse” recipes. Might resurrect “Frank” from Illinois Leader days.
- Thoughts... - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:53 pm:
The Guilt-Free Gourmet
In stark contrast to its name, this sandwich comes with lots of meats and sausage, a minimal amount of “good for you” veggies, loaded with mayo, oil and a special secret sauce on a potato bun.
And you’ll never feel guilty because it tastes so good.
- walter sobchak - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:57 pm:
The El-Wich. A large hot dog, with rocky mountain oysters on the side. Whole or sliced by the prosecution, on wry or whole truth and nothing but the truth, sprinkled with chopped sarcasm and minced words, dipped in statute sauce, served with or without hidden microphones. Cheesy hair, autographs, and insincere smiles at no additional cost.
- Secret Square - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 12:57 pm:
An Elvis peanut butter and banana sandwich, prepared Springfield horseshoe style (piled with fries and smothered in bleeping golden cheese sauce.)
If the mere thought of this sandwich makes your stomach turn or gives you a heart attack… well, that’s exactly what Rod does to us, right?
- Gregor - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 1:02 pm:
Any of these sandwich recipes will work: the key to making it a BLAGO sandwich is to order way more than you need, then dine and dash and thus make somebody else PAY for all of it.
Then tell the chef that the bill’s on Madigan.
- OneMan - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 1:04 pm:
The Rod Roll
Cheese Wiz
Baloney
- Prognosis Negative - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 1:08 pm:
The Acquittal:
Roasted unicorn with a fried Dodo egg on top.
- Cincinnatus - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 1:10 pm:
The Jogger
A running shoe that you can put into your mouth from time to time.
- WRMNpolitics - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 1:17 pm:
Ham, Bologna, Tongue,and Chopped liver with onions and limburger cheese served on a crusty roll. It would be called “Milrod’s Choice”
- The End Is Near - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 1:28 pm:
Let’s just make sure that the sandwich is free for our state’s senior citizens.
- ourMagician - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 1:35 pm:
Milorad
A open faced patti of hamburger with cheese on top and bottom with layers of f-in golden yellow mustard slathered on it.
- Excessively Rabid - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 2:03 pm:
An old fashioned Monte Cristo, since he’s guilty on all counts….
- casual observer - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 2:03 pm:
The “Special Session”. It doesn’t matter what’s in it because once all your guests arrive they just turn right around and go home. And yet, you keep making it and invite them back again.
- Anonymous - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 2:15 pm:
The GRT…toasted
or The 100 Club with a Patti Melt
- Jake from Elwood - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 2:35 pm:
Either the Rueben or the Sloppy Joe, as these will be the names of his cellmates once the trial and sentencing have been concluded.
- Bob - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 2:40 pm:
The FCI Oxford Special, all ingredients can be purchased at the prison commissary~or smuggled out of the mess hall. On slice of bread, place thin layer of ramen noodles (beef flavor), thin layer of chili with beans (canned chili is best, but he will only be able to get it in the safe pouches at that joint), layer of cheese whiz, and top off with sliced jalapenos and another slice of bread. Rod and his celly will appreciate this recipe on those evenings when the kitchen is serving boiled eggs and broccoli.
- Responsa - Friday, Jun 18, 10 @ 3:32 pm:
Thanks everybody! I have plans to go out for dinner and I have completely lost my appetite.