And there I was in this dark alley, cornered by the Evil Skip Saviano …. and who should appear to vanquish him … my savior … Speaker Madigan. But don’t think I don’t keep one eye looking over my shoulder at all times!
We’re going inside of ‘em, we’re going outside of ‘em - inside of ‘em outside of ‘em -
and when we get ‘em on the run once, we’re going to keep ‘em on the run.
And we’re not going to pass unless their secondary comes up too close.
But, don’t forget, men - when we get ‘em on the run, we’re going to go, go, go, go!
And we aren’t going to stop until we go over that goal line!
And don’t forget, men - today is the day, we’re going to win.
They can’t lick us, and the best time to go.
The first who’s gonna, men, go in there and FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!
What do you say, men!
And then Squeezy will sneak up on you like this and take ALL YOUR LUNCH MONEY
- The End Is Near - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:10 am:
“And believe it or not, there was a time when I could have sent all of you to college for free, and all you had to do was agree ‘to live’ (wink, wink) in a house on the 4500 block of South Avers Avenue — but enough about ‘Jaws’ Giorango and me . . .”
“What I’m trying to tell you school children is that what you read in school about how-a-bill-becomes law isn’t exactly how things work in Springfield … you see, there’s a special table at Saputo’s that you need to stop by to shake the Speaker’s hand …”
“Well, I’m here to tell you that you’re probably gonna find out, as you go out there, that you’re not gonna amount to Juan Squat!!” You’re gonna end up eating a steady diet of Cicero government cheese, and living in a van down by the river! Now, young man, what do you want to do with your life?”
…and then George ‘the Animal’ Steele put a flying headlock on Hulk Hogan before they both flipped over the ropes down to the floor. The crowd went wild!
No, I’m not the one that took a bribe, carried a gun on an airplane, or had some shady real estate deals. These are small, minor league offenses - let me show you how we do it in Cicero.
Mira, si ustedes pueden lograr hacer amigos de Miguel Madigan- ustedes tambiene pueden lograr un contrato de $68,000/ano para transladar los apoyos de los gringos. (Translation: Listen if all of you can stay on Mike Madigan’s good side- you too can score a contract of $68k/year to translate the fanfare for the whites!)
“Then … one foggy …Christmas Eve …Santa …Santa!… He came to say … He said, Marty, that me … ‘Marty, with your voice so bold, … won’t you come in from the cold?’ …”
- Just The Way It Is One - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 1:05 pm:
“And THEN, as Hermie, Clarisse, and Yukon Cornelius stood nearby, terrified and helpless, the Abominable Snowman went RIGHT up to Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, went STRAIGHT for his throat and tried to GRAB him by the jugular…!!!” (Note also fellow guest Cardinal Francis George chuckling in the background to himself, enjoying the story thoroughly, and thinking to himself “This guy’s GOOD! I NEVer could tell the story that well!)…
“What the Speaker does, the Speaker sits you right down, he grabs you by shoulders, and looks you … dead in the eye … and asks, ‘You like apples?’ … then you are his. Powerful, just powerful.”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:06 am:
“and then … the Evil Skip-Monster….”
- Spliff - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:06 am:
And there I was in this dark alley, cornered by the Evil Skip Saviano …. and who should appear to vanquish him … my savior … Speaker Madigan. But don’t think I don’t keep one eye looking over my shoulder at all times!
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:07 am:
“So, I slowly went towards the Apple Pie …”
- Just saying - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:08 am:
We’re going inside of ‘em, we’re going outside of ‘em - inside of ‘em outside of ‘em -
and when we get ‘em on the run once, we’re going to keep ‘em on the run.
And we’re not going to pass unless their secondary comes up too close.
But, don’t forget, men - when we get ‘em on the run, we’re going to go, go, go, go!
And we aren’t going to stop until we go over that goal line!
And don’t forget, men - today is the day, we’re going to win.
They can’t lick us, and the best time to go.
The first who’s gonna, men, go in there and FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!
What do you say, men!
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:09 am:
“Niagra Falls! Slowly I turned …”
- Skeeter - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:09 am:
State Senator Sandoval speaking to his emotional peers.
- Jaded - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:10 am:
“Little bunny foo foo goes hopping through the forest scooping up the field mice and bopping them on the head……”
- Leroy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:10 am:
And then Squeezy will sneak up on you like this and take ALL YOUR LUNCH MONEY
- The End Is Near - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:10 am:
“And believe it or not, there was a time when I could have sent all of you to college for free, and all you had to do was agree ‘to live’ (wink, wink) in a house on the 4500 block of South Avers Avenue — but enough about ‘Jaws’ Giorango and me . . .”
- Ray del Camino - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:11 am:
Dang it, Willy, you beat me to it.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:13 am:
- The End Is Near -,
That was really good!
“And then, I went to Cicero Town Hall, I gathered all the members of Larry Dominick’s family together…”
- Jimbo - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:15 am:
Hey kid, toss me a chair.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:15 am:
- Ray del Camino -,
Usually people may say “Great minds”, but I will spare you the burden to being linked to my Dopiness! I am sure yours was better.
“And then Betty said, ‘Let’s see those Feds get me’… and then, (softly) they …(yelling) got her!”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:19 am:
“Then, using both hands, I took those yard signs out of the ground, and burned them….”
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:19 am:
So, kids, this is how we do it on the west side: Gangnam Style.
- WRC - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:21 am:
Only for that lawsuit Avila filed, I would have been a water reclamation commissioner and a state senator, two jobs, two pensions, darn him.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:21 am:
“I know, I never have seen him laugh either! So, I went right behind Speaker Madigan …”
- OneMan - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:23 am:
Ok I can’t give out scholarships anymore, but who wants to wrestle for a patronage job?
- OneMan - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:24 am:
Kids what I do if I don’t like an assembly is clap my hands loudly and begin yelling… That has worked for me.
- Steve Bartin - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:26 am:
“Illinois public pension math is in every math book in the CPS system.”
- NW Illinois - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:28 am:
“What I’m trying to tell you school children is that what you read in school about how-a-bill-becomes law isn’t exactly how things work in Springfield … you see, there’s a special table at Saputo’s that you need to stop by to shake the Speaker’s hand …”
- Siriusly - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:29 am:
So I said to Dan. “Maybe you should drop the hyphen.” You kids know what a hyphen is right ?
- Anonimo - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:32 am:
“Well, I’m here to tell you that you’re probably gonna find out, as you go out there, that you’re not gonna amount to Juan Squat!!” You’re gonna end up eating a steady diet of Cicero government cheese, and living in a van down by the river! Now, young man, what do you want to do with your life?”
- zatoichi - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:37 am:
…and then George ‘the Animal’ Steele put a flying headlock on Hulk Hogan before they both flipped over the ropes down to the floor. The crowd went wild!
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:40 am:
For Willy and Ray…..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yJBhzMWJCc
- 1776 - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:41 am:
No, I’m not the one that took a bribe, carried a gun on an airplane, or had some shady real estate deals. These are small, minor league offenses - let me show you how we do it in Cicero.
- Sinister - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:45 am:
“The amount of money I make from Cicero adds up to this biiiggg!!”
- Five Percenter - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:48 am:
Mira, si ustedes pueden lograr hacer amigos de Miguel Madigan- ustedes tambiene pueden lograr un contrato de $68,000/ano para transladar los apoyos de los gringos. (Translation: Listen if all of you can stay on Mike Madigan’s good side- you too can score a contract of $68k/year to translate the fanfare for the whites!)
- Todd - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:51 am:
No really, the chupacabra was this big. . . with fangs a nashing and claws . . .
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 10:09 am:
“Then … one foggy …Christmas Eve …Santa …Santa!… He came to say … He said, Marty, that me … ‘Marty, with your voice so bold, … won’t you come in from the cold?’ …”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 10:10 am:
- Anonymous -,
Thank you for the YouTube.
- Darienite - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 10:33 am:
So this is my Al Pimonte immitation.
- Montrose - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 10:41 am:
Teacher - “This is the best “Scared Straight - Say No to Being a Politician Day” ever.”
- Formerly Known As... - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 10:47 am:
Illinois Sen. Martin Sandoval pretends he’s a giant surrounded by Lilliputians.
- Mama - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 10:48 am:
It was a dark stormy night… The night we drove off the scary fiscal cliff.
- Formerly Known As... - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 10:56 am:
Sen. Sandoval channels his inner T-Rex, taking a lesson from Dr. Robert Doback, Dale and Brennan.
- Senator Clay Davis - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 11:06 am:
So this guy tried to take the White Sox track jacket that I wear in all my constituent emails…
- Tex - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 11:32 am:
Aww, c’mon man. Teacher! Johnny’s in my seat again! I’m gonna tell on you… my mommy said you can’t bully me any more.
- Jake From Elwood - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 11:58 am:
“So children, I really am a puppet of Mike Madigan. And you can’t even see the strings.”
- George Prado - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 12:12 pm:
The HDO monster is coming to get you.
- Just The Way It Is One - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 1:05 pm:
“And THEN, as Hermie, Clarisse, and Yukon Cornelius stood nearby, terrified and helpless, the Abominable Snowman went RIGHT up to Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, went STRAIGHT for his throat and tried to GRAB him by the jugular…!!!” (Note also fellow guest Cardinal Francis George chuckling in the background to himself, enjoying the story thoroughly, and thinking to himself “This guy’s GOOD! I NEVer could tell the story that well!)…
- Ah HA - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 1:08 pm:
That fish was this big I swear!!
- Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 1:16 pm:
I like your yellow shirts! I’m wearing a yellow tie today myself.
Back in my district, I have to wear the same color all the time.
- Boone Logan Square - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 1:30 pm:
Sandbot 3000 — will — sit — down. Prime directive — is — to — sit — down.
- just sayin' - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 1:32 pm:
Are you that Gangnam Style guy?
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 1:46 pm:
“What the Speaker does, the Speaker sits you right down, he grabs you by shoulders, and looks you … dead in the eye … and asks, ‘You like apples?’ … then you are his. Powerful, just powerful.”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 2:19 pm:
Am I in “Quarantine” Rich?
- Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 2:32 pm:
Willy in “Time-out?” Say it ain’t so!
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 3:00 pm:
Whew, it just seemed my browser was in “Time-Out” …
Rich has put me in “Time-Out” before…I then slept in the garage for a week and only ate cold food for Penance. It was a tough week.
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 3:36 pm:
“- The End Is Near -,
That was really good!”
High praise coming from the master, Oswego Willy. Thanks.
- The End Is Near - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 3:37 pm:
Last one was from me, Willy. Sorry.
- amalia - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 3:45 pm:
and here’s how I took down the ChubaSaviano.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 3:46 pm:
- The End Is Near -,
You’re All Good. The Post was very good, well done, made me laugh.
- Vibes - Tuesday, Dec 11, 12 @ 9:11 pm:
Altogether now …
“I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas, I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas …”
Because that dang song came in my head, and now you all have to hum it too.