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Caption contest!
Tuesday, Jan 29, 2013 - Posted by Rich Miller * From, of course, Treasurer Dan Rutherford’s Facebook page…  And, no, I don’t believe that’s Aaron Schock in the photo behind Rutherford. But it looks a bit like him, don’t you think? As always, keep it clean, people.
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- Paul Lyin - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:46 am:
Ok Mr. Rutherford, now that your hair has been trimmed, time to frost your tips. Then, it will be time for you mani-pedi. Would you like a seaweed wrap as well?
- lincolnlover - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:47 am:
Just a moment, sir, while I get out my magic wand.
- AlphaBettor - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:48 am:
She just offered to fix me up with her mom.
- wordslinger - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:48 am:
Next on Twitter, I’ll reveal the contents of my navel!
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:51 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Nope, this was the BEFORE picture #HighAndTightIsAlwaysRight
@FakeRutherfordDan - Pongee says sideburns, I was a rebel and cut them! #ElvisHasLeftTheBarber
@FakeRutherfordDan - Hey General Assembly, I am getting my ears lowered, how about you do the same w/ the budget? #ShavingTheSidesDoesntCount
@FakeRutherfordDan - I am going to see Magadeath and Metallica in Champaign, so I need the right haircut #MohawkOrMullet
@FakeRutherfordDan - I wanted to g back to my youth, so I brought mt favorite pic of me I keep over my bed to help the Barber #ILikeMeAlotAskMe
- Stones - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:51 am:
“I want my head to look just like that guy’s in the picture!”
- Ron Burgundy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:53 am:
“I’m going to take us back to the days of an Illinois governor with good hair! What could go wrong?”
- WazUp - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:55 am:
“This chair is really uncomfortable…wait a minute I’m sitting on ‘your wallet’ !”
- OneMan - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 9:57 am:
@FakeAaronSchock Don’t vote for a guy who goes to supercuts
@FakeAaronSchock Hey @FakeRutherfordDan you are never going to win unless you have a full grooming team and a stylist like me.
@FakeAaronSchock Hey @FakeRutherfordDan the cover of Modern Maturity is no Men’s Health, but take what you can get I guess.
- Levois - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:01 am:
Ooo-La-La Sasoon!
- zatoichi - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:02 am:
That little patch in front helps keep my hat on during horseshoe tournaments. Nice, huh?
- NIref - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:04 am:
Rutherford begins to regret going to a salon instead of a real barber.
- Ahoy! - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:04 am:
The Treasurer has starting to spike his hair in front and will additionally start “popping” his collars.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:13 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - fingers crossed, if I am good, a lollypop will be my reward! #LollypopsAndHaircuitsFor11AndUnder
@FakeRutherfordDan - A quick “Danny-Poll”, do I go “Beiber” “Pattenson” or “Herzog” #HittingAllDemoGroups
@FakeRutherfordDan - Yeah, the picture of me is a bit large for the Barber, but you need something big to get all I am. “EgosRequireAttention
@FakeRutherfordDan - Toilets, Haircuits, wait till you see what I do next! #YesYouNeedToCareAboutMe
@FakeRutherfordDan - I usually go a #3 for the top and #2 on the sides. Today, #2 on the top and #3 on the sides! #HappyOppositeDay
@FakeRutherfordDan - Some Dems said I need to cut 10% from my own budget. Here you go, democrats, 10% I thought of - off the top of my head! #HaircutHumorIsSharp
- Manti - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:15 am:
Is he in the way? Sorry about that. Just a thought bubble that pops up from time to time. Think about Pongee. Think about Pongee. Think about Pongee.
- BW - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:15 am:
Louis: Looking good, Billy Ray! Billy Ray: Feeling good, Louis!
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:20 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Yea, this is the haircuit I choose and pay for #GroomingJokesHurt
@FakeRutherfordDan - I told the Barber “Save these clippings, A future governor’s hair is worth something!” #YepISaidThat
@FakeRutherfordDan - I bet @FedGuestBlago doesn’t get this service with his hair! #PrisonCutsHaveLessFlair
@FakeRutherfordDan - When the Barber finished, I signed my poster-size yearbook picture for her. #ReallyNotNecessary
@FakeRutherfordDan - The Barber asked if I was someone famous, I told her, “No, just a humble public servant” #PrentendingToBeRealAlwaysLookFake
- the wonderboy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:21 am:
“No no no…hold up the mirror again! I’m not done looking at me!”
- OurMagician - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:21 am:
Dan Rutherford just saw the picture on the wall and found it a bit, um, schocking.
- Irish - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:22 am:
“Illinois has more money than it needs!!!” “Bazinga!!!”
“How do you like the way Penny did my hair?”
- Cheswick - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:22 am:
The Three Tops.
- Fred's Mustache - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:25 am:
State Treasurer Dan Rutherford was the first in line today as the Supercuts in the Thompson Center is having its monthly special.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:29 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - gel or no gel … seriously. #Vanity
@FakeRutherfordDan - 1 more haircut, and my next is “free” #ValueIsDifferentForEveryone
@FakeRutherfordDan - Was dissapointed when Barber yelled “Dan” and didn’t look at me right away. #TipMaysuffer
@FakeRutherfordDan - Necessary haircuit, my head is not fitting in the double-doors of my Office. #BigEgoLargeHead
- the wonderboy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:30 am:
(Photo on the cover of his latest mailer)
Dear (Insert Name of Person I am Asking for Money),
I’ve been out talking to voters all over the state, and one thing is clear–you all want me to be governor. While I have fought back and done my darndest to avoid the call, I can hold back the chants of my people no more. So I’m in it…if you can just help me out in one small way.
As you can see, I have lots of hair clippings. Your campaign to get me elected as governor is going to cost lots of money. So, for just $29, I will send you a piece of my hair with an autographed business card (with Alexi’s name crossed off to save money). For just $53, I’ll throw in a picture of me washing Pongee. And for just $1000, I’ll send you the plunger I used to fix my own toilet at me condo in Chicago.
By the way, my sister wanted to send this note from her house as I’m on the road, but I decided I could take care of this one.
Your pal and the one you have been waiting for,
Dan
P.S. If you’ll send me a book of stamps, I’ll send you a link to my “personalized” birthday video…just for you.
- Wumpus - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:32 am:
Well, I could have done worse and gone to her stylist
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:34 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Would a tweet of me waxing my back next be .. too much? #WhereIsTheLine
- Irish - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:34 am:
Dan Rutherford under cover in an attempt to catch the Great Clips Robber. “I heard there was a reward” he stated, “I could use the money in my budget in case Quinn cuts me again.”
Dan Rutherford poses for his poster for his
“I got trimmed so should you.” campaign on cuts in the Illinois budget.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:36 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - just getting a haircuit, like everyone else #GoveOopsTreasurersArePeopleToo
- dupage dan - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:38 am:
Now that Carmindy has completed Dan’s makeup he will be finishing up with hosts Stacy and Clinton and then it’s on to the final reveal on this weeks’ edition of “What Not To Wear”!!!
(yeah, yeah - I watch it. Stop laughing)
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:41 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - reminded my Barber to “Save the Date” come January 2015. #InauguralHaircutBooked
- Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:41 am:
“This is the last time I ever stop in at the SuperCuts in Peoria.”
PS: great foto pick Rich
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:44 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Barber told me they were all fighting over my haircut. Honored. #ShortStrawDoesNotMeanWin
- Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:46 am:
background music…
“I always feel like somebody’s watchin’ me”
DR: Can you change the song?
Stylist: Well, I guess, just a minute.
music..
“I’m starting with the man in the mirror”
DR: DO YOU HAVE RUSH LIMBAUGH?
- Jake From Elwood - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:47 am:
I just realized that Dan Rutherford and I share essentially the same haircut although his is probably grayer.
That’s a good looking haircut!
- Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:50 am:
#willyenfuegoonceagain
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:56 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - thank you so much to “Super Cuts” at 265 Main, Pontiac. You guys are great and always cut my hair right. #YouCanHaveYourBusinessTweetedTooAskForRates
- WazUp - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:57 am:
“After my haircut please give me a shave..both chins please”
- Michelle Flaherty - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 10:58 am:
Rich, the only similarity to Schock is the size of the head.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:05 am:
Thanks, - AA -…apppreciate that.
@FakeRutherfordDan - I told the Barber I am on TV quite often, she must not have television. #HowCanYouNotKnowMe?
- anon sequitor - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:11 am:
“I’m schocked, schocked, to find that politicking going on in here!”
- anon sequitor - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:14 am:
oops, edit: “politicking IS going on in here!”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:16 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Those tweeting back, yea, I bring my own sheet when I get my haircut, doesn’t everyone? #UsedRutherfordStuffHasEbayMarket
- siriusly - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:20 am:
“As always, keep it clean, people.”
good one rich
- South of Sherman - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:22 am:
Rutherford PAYS someone for that haircut? I assumed all he needed for that was two beers and a weed-whacker.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:31 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - I bet Oswego Willy I could go without posting on The Facebook for 1 hour. I lost & pay off my bets. Kojak, right OW? #DoubleOrNothingGoldfishOW?
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:41 am:
@FakeRutherfordDan - “Danny-Poll” What should I have shaved on the back of my head; State Seal, Dollar Sign, or “DR Rulz”. Random winning tweet gets my HS Yearbook poster, seen behind me, signed. #YeahIAmSeriousVoteNow
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:45 am:
“Look, I understand YOUR point, but I said to take the picture and post it on The Facebook. That is your job. Post it.”
- Formerly Known As... - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:45 am:
if the people want transparency, I’ll give them transparency.
24 hour Dan-cam reality show coming soon.
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:49 am:
I’m so popular now that the paparazzi are following me everywhere. (My staffer taking the photograph told me to say that.)
- VanillaMan - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:56 am:
Rutherford getting clipped, while everyone else in Illinois gets scalped.
- Ghost of John Brown - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 11:56 am:
Forget the fake Schock photo, doesn’t the barber look like that goofy Kate from “Kate + 8″? Maybe her 15 minutes of fame is over and she had to get a real job.
- Anon. - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 12:26 pm:
Don’t these downstaters ever get tired of the “where’s mine” jokes?
- Joe M - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 12:37 pm:
I’m sorry mam, I don’t have the $20 to pay for my haircut. Blame it on state employees and the Democrats.
- Publius - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 12:41 pm:
Seven staffers worked hard to schedule this event…but i don’t think this is what the boss meant by “get me good clippings.”
- Esquire - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 1:01 pm:
Mister Treasurer, you do understand that your on air appearance with the morning hosts at WLS is a radio station broadcast?
- MrJM - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 1:25 pm:
Him: “Give me my usual…”
Her: “One ‘Little League Umpire’ coming right up!”
– MrJM
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 1:49 pm:
@FakeRutherfordDan - the only thing that makes me feel closer to the “little pepole”, other than The Facebook or The Twitter, is getting a haircuit. No fanfare, just haircut. #LetThemGetHaircuits
@FakeRutherfordDan - In Pontiac getting a haircut. #OopsIFacebookedIWasWorkingBusted
@FakeRutherfordDan - This haircut style? I get it when I don’t care how I look. #IBetYouThinkThisTweetIsAbout You
@FakeRutherfordDan - @FakePongee asked his Treasurer to get a haircut. My spikey locks make his inside sneeze! #PongeeNeedsThePressNotMe
@FakeRutherfordDan - Hey @Capitolfax, want me to make an appointment for you? #DeflectToRichIfThisBecomesAContest
@FakeRutherfordDan - My usual Barber Floyd was fishing with Andy and Barney. #AndyGriffinReferencetoSeemNastalgic
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 1:56 pm:
@FakeRutherfordDan - brought my VCR tape of “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” to the new haircut place in town. Watched the movie and got a trim. The “Car” chair was fun too. #KiddieKlipsFanForLife
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:01 pm:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Whoa! When did Barbers stop giving lollypops and start giving “stickers”? I got a Spiderman sticker, but still? #ButIRealGood
- Cincinnatus - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:10 pm:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VgPiIpboxt0 …two bits
- the Patriot - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:14 pm:
I’ll take the Blago. for $400 you get a haircut, soap on a rope, and a one way ticket to the bighouse!
- Earnest - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:15 pm:
Voice from the Schock-esque right shoulder: keep your part on the right if you want to look like a governor!
Voice from the suburban-woman-esque left shoulder: part it in the center if you want to look like you could be my governor!
- Boone Logan Square - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:16 pm:
High and tight.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:24 pm:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Getting things done for Illinois! Haircut, …too short? #FlashOverSubstanceAndBeSalesmen
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:25 pm:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Hickory beat Terre Haute, getting my free haircut. #Hoosiers
- inker - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:42 pm:
I AM RUNNING FOR GOVERNOR, JUST GET OVER IT CONGRESSMAN.
- Just The Way It Is One - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:46 pm:
Pick any one of his above comments. I think OW wins (by thoroughness, if anything). All the rest of us might as well quit now while we’re behind…! (I’d give an Honorable Mention to Vanilla Man @ 11:56 am, though).
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 2:53 pm:
1) - Just The Way It Is One -, thanks, always appreciate the feedback, glad you enjoyed them.
2) We need to keep going, the point is also for participation, not to discourage. I enjoy reading all the posts and the more the merrier.
Thanks again.
- ZC - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 3:05 pm:
Rutherford neglected to read the fine print on his demonic contract: he keeps aging, the portrait keeps getting younger.
- ThatGuy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 3:08 pm:
‘My regular stylist, Ramon, was unavailable today’
- OneMan - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 3:24 pm:
Here in Virginia, oops, I mean Peoria, that sort of thing does not play well sir. We all know that this haircut is being paid for by some hedge fund manager trying to use his fortune to deny the people…
Don’t check my IP
- Sunshine - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 3:32 pm:
Was out at a conference and just got back. Vanilla wins hands down!!
- Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 3:35 pm:
Good one OneMan.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 3:40 pm:
===Don’t check my IP===
lol, Classic!
Make sure you wave heading towards curling.
- OneMan - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 4:12 pm:
== Make sure you wave heading towards curling. ==
Will do, get this Sunday off due to the big game..
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 4:18 pm:
===to the big game.. ====
“Super Bowl” as a name, title, or discription herein, is the sole property of the National Football League, its Member Teams and the NFL Players’ Association.
Thank you, - OneMan - for respecting our trademark.
Sincerely,
The NFL.
To the caption:
@FakeRutherfordDan - I call this my “iCut for iCash” haircut. #RebrandingRulez
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 4:20 pm:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Sorry to my Barber, I didn’t get your consent to post this picure on my The Facebook. I will take this picture down, that I keep refering to. #StaffNeedsToRememberWaivers
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 4:22 pm:
@FakeRutherfordDan - Check out my The Facebook, I just posted this picture and the story of my haircut. My The YouTube page has the video too! #BeingDopeyOnAllMediums
- ame - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 6:12 pm:
Based on Rutherford’s last Facebook post: Bozo gets a haircut.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 6:32 pm:
80 posts, Treasurer Rutherford.
Why you keep posting these dopey pictures is beyond me.. Thanks for the comedy, when you want us to take what your Twitter or Facebook has to say, we will know when pictures like these go away.
Sincerely,
Oswego Willy
p.s. Take this outside of my other posts, but I stand by all the jokes, make no mistake
- bullet - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 6:48 pm:
where is the barber from mayberry when you need him
- Pot calling kettle - Tuesday, Jan 29, 13 @ 8:47 pm:
Pat Quinn’s cut is just as good, but it’s a lot cheaper. So, at least he’s go that goin’ for him.