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Question of the day

Tuesday, Jun 18, 2013 - Posted by Rich Miller

* Gov. Pat Quinn…

* The Question: Caption?

       

72 Comments
  1. - Stones - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:09 pm:

    Hummm…let’s see….Chapter 14 - Forging a Consensus


  2. - Dirty Red - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:09 pm:

    “According to this Boy Scouts handbook, the best way to treat this impasse is with a tourniquet.”


  3. - In the know - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:10 pm:

    “Let the will of the Conference Committee be the law of the land! Now which one of these house rules MAKES the Speaker appoint conferees?”


  4. - Tsavo - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:11 pm:

    “Give me a minute, I need to look up Speaker Madigan’s cell phone number”


  5. - Darienite - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:11 pm:

    “Let us pray………….”


  6. - Formerly Known As... - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:12 pm:

    “So this is Madigan’s ‘magic wizard’ handbook? Looks a bit old and tattered to me.”


  7. - Mmmmmmm - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:13 pm:

    Ha Ha!! I stole Cullerton’s only copy of the Illinois Constitution, now I am gonna let Squeazy eat it so we can take this goofy notion of consideration off the table!!!!


  8. - A. Nonymous - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:15 pm:

    During a press conference in gambling, fracking and pensions, Gov. Pat Quinn talks with reporters about his favorite recipes from a Chicago breakfast eatery which he recently visited. He ended the conference by talking about how he was put on this earth to extol the virtues of fried eggs and bacons.


  9. - Formerly Known As... - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:15 pm:

    “Guys, I’m lost. I just hit the last page in ‘Squeezy’s Guide to the Pension Crisis’.

    I got nothing now. Nuh-thing. Nada.”


  10. - BR - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:15 pm:

    So you’re saying I have to go along with this Constitution stuff?


  11. - SouthernIL - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:16 pm:

    I know in this book … it states -”all must follow my lead,the Governor, no matter what.” WAIT…”it appears the page has been torn out.”


  12. - TCB - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:19 pm:

    Pictured is Governor Pat Quinn after accidently eating a candle at breakfast Saturday. Apparently Governor Quinn mistakenly swallowed a lit candle that was on the table while peering across the street Saturday morning to take record of those attending AG Madigan’s event. Quinn, refusing to look away, not wanting to miss a thing, and bit/swallowed a large piece of the candle before his speaking engagement.


  13. - Boone's is Back - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:19 pm:

    “Speaker Madigan, let me read to you some words of wisdom on solving the pension crisis in Illinois…

    Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Goldilocks. She went for a walk in the forest. Pretty soon, she came upon a house. She knocked and, when no one answered, she walked right in.

    At the table in the kitchen, there were three bowls of porridge. Goldilocks was hungry. She tasted the porridge from the first bowl.

    “This porridge is too hot!” she exclaimed.

    So, she tasted the porridge from the second bowl.

    ‘This porridge is too cold,’ she said

    So, she tasted the last bowl of porridge.

    ‘Ahhh, this porridge is just right,’ she said happily and she ate it all up.”


  14. - wordslinger - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:19 pm:

    “…and I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee.”


  15. - Norseman - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:22 pm:

    Just a minute, let me check my Governing for Dummies book.


  16. - MrJM - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:23 pm:

    I could not, would not, on a boat.
    I will not, will not, with a goat.
    I will not eat them in the rain.
    I will not eat them on a train.
    Not in the dark! Not in a tree!
    Not in a car! You let me be!
    I do not like them in a box.
    I do not like them with a fox.
    I will not eat them in a house.
    I do not like them with a mouse.
    I do not like them here or there.
    I do not like them ANYWHERE!

    – MrJM


  17. - John A Logan - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:25 pm:

    Pat Quinn holds a signed copy of “Profile’s in Porridge, The Jason Plummer Story”


  18. - unclesam - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:25 pm:

    Let me just read you a quick passage from my favorite book…the one I’ve got with me here…”Red fish, blue fish…one fish, two fish.”


  19. - archimedes - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:26 pm:

    “So, that’s the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. SB1 is just too hard, SB2404 is just too soft. So we have this Conference Committee that makes it just right.”


  20. - A. Nonymous - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:27 pm:

    Spit out my pop Mr. MJM!

    Score.


  21. - Dirty Red - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:27 pm:

    “The accusations of voter fraud as charged by Mr. Keats and Sen. Brady are not true. Right here in this book are the names of good, law abiding Illinoisans who said they would vote for me just before they died.”


  22. - Chicago Cynic - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:27 pm:

    “Look Mike, it says right here that the Governor is the most powerful leader in the state. No, really. This means what I say goes.”


  23. - LisleMike - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:28 pm:

    A book on “How to Govern through Commons Sense solutions?” Is this your idea of a joke?


  24. - VanillaMan - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:28 pm:

    “It says right here in “Poor Rich’s Almanac of Poor Illinois Politics” that based on the position of the Father and of the Daughter, I am to plant my contributions where the sun don’t hide.”


  25. - A. Nonymous - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:29 pm:

    When asked about pension reform during a recent press conference, Gov. Quinn responded by reading a short story entitled “My Pet Goat, Part 2″.


  26. - Bill K - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:31 pm:

    According to this reelection handbook, I should be able to use Concealed carry as a political tool. Boy, I just wish I could retain what I read.


  27. - Dirty Red - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:32 pm:

    “After reading Mayor Emanuel’s memoirs, I’ve invited Quaxelrod and Carl the Intern to join my campaign.”


  28. - 47th Ward - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:32 pm:

    It’s easy to grin when your ship has come in and you’ve got the stock market beat. But the man worthwhile is the man who can smile when his shorts are too tight in the seat.


  29. - kerfuffle - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:33 pm:

    I think archimedes has the best comment but instead of “Goldilocks and the Three Bears” we should change the title to “Gridlock and the Three Bears.”


  30. - Irish - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:35 pm:

    “What??
    What bill on drilling in a National forest?
    I did not!
    Nobody said anything about that. They said sign the frackin bill so I signed the frackin bill.”


  31. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:47 pm:

    “I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It’s when you know you’re licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what.
    - Atticus Finch”


  32. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:48 pm:

    “Atticus said to Jem one day, “I’d rather you shot at tin cans in the backyard, but I know you’ll go after birds. Shoot all the blue jays you want, if you can hit ‘em, but remember it’s a sin to kill a mockingbird.” That was the only time I ever heard Atticus say it was a sin to do something, and I asked Miss Maudie about it. “Your father’s right,” she said. “Mockingbirds don’t do one thing except make music for us to enjoy. They don’t eat up people’s gardens, don’t nest in corn cribs, they don’t do one thing but sing their hearts out for us. That’s why it’s a sin to kill a mockingbird.”


  33. - Big D - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:50 pm:

    “And on the 11th Day the Lord placed Pat Quinn on this Earth to solve the pension crisis in Illinois.”


  34. - Adam - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:50 pm:

    How could he? How could Snape kill Dumbledore…?


  35. - Irish - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:53 pm:

    According to my copy of Robert’s Rules, Mikey can’t do that……


  36. - Dry Blanket - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 1:54 pm:

    “And that’s the lesson of Abraham Lincoln, that we have to work together for the people and it’s something we need to realize today in Illinois which is named after Lincoln as the Land of Lincoln because Lincoln knew that we have to be united, not divided, and always keep working for solutions for people in Illinois who live in the Land of Lincoln and believe that the will of the people should be the law of the land. And also Lincoln.”


  37. - OneMan - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:02 pm:

    They said, right here in the Jungle Book there was a chapter about how that snake solved the jungle’s pension problem…


  38. - Anonymous - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:02 pm:

    Norseman @1:22 wins. Best I can do is “It says right here in the NRA Handbook…”


  39. - VanillaMan - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:04 pm:

    Thrift State, by Macklemore - enhanced by VanillaMan

    I’m gonna pop some tags
    Only got twenty bonds in my pocket
    I-I-I’m huntin’
    Lookin for a way out
    Lisa’s lookin politically awesome

    Now, walk into the Assembly like, “what up I got a big rock”
    I’m so pumped I’m The Gov from our Thrift State
    Ice in the fridge is so dang frosty
    The Speaker like “damn, that’s one dumb donkey!”
    Rollin’ in hella deep, headed for the mezzanine
    Dressed in all pink, ‘cept my Betsy Bag she’s turned green
    Draped in Blagoruption Stink, my Simon Girl next to me
    Probably should have washed this smells like Triple J’s future
    Missssssssssssseddddd
    But, shut up, it was ninety nine cents (bagged it Kelly)
    Votin it, washin it
    Bout to go and get some compliments passin off my frackin it
    Someone else has been crackin it, hackin it, grungie bring ‘em in
    I am fakin'’ my bacon and collectin’ my rake-ins, I’m a bargain butch
    I’m takin the Texan’s style, I’m takin’ the Texan’s style
    No, for real
    Ask Governor Perry, can I have his hand-me-downs (thank you)
    Velour jump suit and an old Suburban
    Washed up pharmabusinesses goin’ otta bidness,
    Old silicon chips, some old solar bustness, good for the PR
    They got a broken frack reg, we copied broken frack reg, cuz were broke n I’m not too proud to beg!

    I’m gonna pop some tags
    Only got IOUs in my pocket
    I-I-I’m campaigning
    Lookin’ for some voters
    I’m so frackin’ awesome!


  40. - Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:05 pm:

    After reading it again, I’m even more convinced that I can veto a conference committee report.


  41. - Bluefish - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:11 pm:

    As it says right here in this State of Illinois Instruction Manual, which by the way Rod told me was lost but I found it under three sealed letters in the top desk drawer of the second floor office, right here, on page 56, in bold letters, and I quote “It is the governor’s job to sign bills approved by the General Assembly.” I keep telling Mike and John this but they don’t seem to be listening. Maybe I should go read those three letters and see if they have any advice that could help.


  42. - Bill White - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:14 pm:

    Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to mourn the end of my political career.

    It isn’t often that someone gets to eulogize themselves at their own funeral so let me start with a reading from the Holy Book of Madigan.


  43. - Nickypiii - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:15 pm:

    Once upon a time I was a Gadfly who no one took seriously. Now I am the Governor of the great State of Illinois and still no one takes me seriously!!!!!


  44. - Quizzical - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:17 pm:

    You’re wrong Mr. Speaker. I’ve go the book ‘The Prince’ right here and it’s not by Macchiaveli, it’s by a French guy, Saint-Exupery.


  45. - BehindTheScenes - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:24 pm:

    No, really. Someone tore that page out of my playbook.


  46. - dupage dan - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:27 pm:

    Well, I was going to have the big signing of the Fracking bill in Mt Carmel - my Super 8 Motel directory here says it’s a nice place. But, then I realized that all the coupons in the back of the directory were over 3 years old, so……….


  47. - Small Town Taxpayer - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:31 pm:

    I was reading this book the other day and I find that Illinois may have a small pension funding problem.


  48. - Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:34 pm:

    VM, outstanding. Good to see you back in the game.


  49. - God's Country - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:37 pm:

    Super 8 needs to put in an order for one Gideon’s Bible.


  50. - Michelle Flaherty - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:41 pm:

    But Mr. Conductor had lost his sparkle and he needed Lady to help him find the magic rainbow railroad.


  51. - Waco Kid - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 2:55 pm:

    Governor Quinn reacts after being told he is holding the book upside down.


  52. - AFSCME Steward - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:18 pm:

    Cullerton, you’re not gonna like this. It says here in Illinois Governing For Dummies that Madigan is always right and challenges to his authority are pointless.


  53. - Tankr - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:18 pm:

    Lisa, were you playing with the crayons again?


  54. - Aldyth - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:29 pm:

    Who cut pages 52 to 86 out of “How to Lead and Build Consensus?” I found this book in the desk right after we booted Blago.


  55. - gallerywalker - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:36 pm:

    Hey you guys, it really does say in the Illinois Constitution…SECTI
    Membership in any pension or retirement system of the
    State, any unit of local government or school district, or
    any agency or instrumentality thereof, shall be an
    enforceable contractual relationship, the benefits of which
    shall not be diminished or impaired.


  56. - RetiredStateEmployee - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:42 pm:

    Quinn finally found his copy of the constitution that he had in high school. He didn’t read it then either.


  57. - The End Is Near - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:45 pm:

    “‘And when He had opened the Fourth Seal, I heard the voice of the Fourth Beast say, Come.’

    That’s enough for now. Listen, all I’m saying to the people of Illinois is . . . “


  58. - railrat - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:50 pm:

    my Dodge Dart has a flat never fixed one before lets see…..


  59. - Anonymous - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 3:57 pm:

    “Governing For Dummies”, why”?


  60. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 4:04 pm:

    (Clears throat)

    “It was the Worst of Times, and the WORST of times …”


  61. - Anonymous - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 4:27 pm:

    “So one more downgrade and it is junk bond status?”

    (Looking up in his definition book) Junk bonds are risky investments, but have speculative appeal because they offer much higher yields than safer bonds. States that issue junk bonds typically have less-than-stellar credit ratings, and investors demand these higher yields as compensation for the risk of investing in them.


  62. - Tommydanger - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 4:37 pm:

    Governor Quinn addresses the Special Legislative Pension Committee, by reading an excerpt from his book; “Fifty Shades of Quinn.”

    “I want you sore, baby,” he murmurs, and he continues his sweet, leisurely torment, backward, forward. “Every time you move tomorrow, I want you to be reminded that I’ve been here. Only me. You are mine.”

    Quinn


  63. - Amalia - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 4:57 pm:

    Vanilla Man. No reason to even try after that! styling’


  64. - Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 5:21 pm:

    Tommy danger, clever. Save the other 49 shades, though. Don’t want the Banhammer to fall on such a clever guy.

    To the Post,

    “If Representative Nekritz really believes that public employes are bad people because they would pick the choice that’s best for them instead of the State, she should just say that. As it says right here in the New Testament…”


  65. - Just The Way It Is One - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 5:40 pm:

    “Hang on–I TOLD ya I’m LOOKin’, I’m LOOKin’ for the passage from the ‘Good Book’ here ’bout how I AM the One who IS destined to pass Pension Reform in Illinois–I AM, I swear, or…I aFFIRM that is,’cuz, that’s right, you’re not supposed to SWEAR as to anything on Earth, Jesus said, but, anyway–YOU’LL see…I WILL be that guy, even if I can’t find it written in here…

    Oh, wait, yeah–this is it–”render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar’s…”– and so, I’M aKIN to a modern-day CAEsa,r here in Illinois, ok, as our GOVernor, and, well that’s it, yeah, right there–Caesar would like PENsion Reform so the good Lord says you have to give that to me–it’s DIVINE; ya just have to…oh yeah, that’s right, we just need 30, and then, 60 extra votes from those OTHer, um, “LITtle” Caesars, too, that’s what I’d call them, ya know, in the Senate and the House–oh, oh no, that’s right–THAT’s a PIZza Joint, but, well, anyway, that’s the basic idea; ok, gotta go–thanks everyone.

    Just remember, it’s my DEStiny, ‘n…Jesus sanctions it, so, ya know, don’t let me DOWN this time now…!”


  66. - poor senior - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 5:55 pm:

    It says right here in the House Rule Book, written by Michael Madigan over 40 years ago, that I don’t have to do anything as governor because he makes all the decisions.


  67. - Anon. - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 6:00 pm:

    Of course, God put me on this earth to solve the pension problem. See, right here, James 5:4, it says . . . uh, never mind.


  68. - just demoralized - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 6:44 pm:

    Look, right here in the ‘Handbook of State Government’ its says I’M Governor.


  69. - Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 8:35 pm:

    @FakePatQuinn 140 characters Heavens to Betsy you have to be kidding! I think Madigan and his bill are both full of (limit exceeded)


  70. - BentheDem - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 8:49 pm:

    “…goodnight room, goodnight moon…”


  71. - mokenavince - Tuesday, Jun 18, 13 @ 10:43 pm:

    I’m studying for my CDL.I will still need a job after the next election.


  72. - Sandy - Wednesday, Jun 19, 13 @ 6:14 pm:

    I just don’t see that in the rule book…


Sorry, comments for this post are now closed.


* Sunday roundup: Rep. Williams says no takeover; 'Guardrail' bill floated; More alderpersons sign letter; Biz weighs in; CTU president claims city pays the bills for 'every municipality in this state'; Progressive Caucus supports letter
* News coverage roundup: Entire Chicago Board of Education to resign (Updated x2)
* Mayor to announce school board appointments on Monday
* Reader comments closed for the weekend
* Isabel’s afternoon roundup
* Question of the day (Updated)
* Ahead of mass school board resignation, some mayoral opponents ask Pritzker to step in, but he says he has no legal authority (Updated x5)
* Governor’s office says Senate Republicans are “spreading falsehoods” with their calls for DCFS audit (Updated)
* Meanwhile… In Opposite Land
* Open thread
* Isabel’s morning briefing
* SUBSCRIBERS ONLY - Supplement to today’s edition and some campaign and court-related stuff
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