CAPTION CONTEST!
Wednesday, Sep 4, 2013 - Posted by Rich Miller Posted by Barton Lorimor (@bartonlorimor) Thanks to a commenter who emailed this to me from Bruce Rauner’s Twitter feed… Caption? Snark encouraged, but remember to keep it appropriate.
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- Allen Skillicorn - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:13 am:
When does a candidate have time to hunt?
Seriously?
- Todd - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:13 am:
Bruce to himself:
This picture REALLY drives my liberal Democrat wife crazy!
- Arthur Andersen - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:29 am:
One dog that will hunt next to one dog that won’t.
- wordslinger - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:33 am:
“I just got back from safari. Last week, I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know….”
- Judgment Day (Road Trip) - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:46 am:
“I got my limit of Sparrows today”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:46 am:
“Ok, Bruce … just like always, pretend you like this …”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:47 am:
“Don’t worry, in the picture, the dog will look real …”
- danray - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:51 am:
Rauner’s attempt to pander to the Duck Dynasty crowd renders him virtually invisible to everyone else.
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:53 am:
Bruce Rauners, “The Facebook” page;
“Hunting with my friends. (Not pictured, Rich Daley and Rahm Emanuel)”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:55 am:
“Really, Bruce … the stuff dog works, just go with it.”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:56 am:
“We have to hurry, Bruce needs to change into overalls and pretend to milk a cow, then change and pretend to drive a combine …”
- danray - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:57 am:
“Just enforced some “term limits” on this here bird.”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 7:59 am:
“Bruce! The dog … it’s fine. Just look here. It’s a picture, if you want, we can add other stuffed animals to make it look liked you hunt, but seriously, the dog is fine, just smile …”
- Skeptic - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:00 am:
“See? I *am* a better shot than Dick Cheney!”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:01 am:
“Fine. ‘Props’, can you do something with the ears, Bruce thinks raising the ears a little makes the dog look…like a ‘hunter-er’ or something …so lift the ears please …”
- anonymoose - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:01 am:
If you ask me, the dog is real, the candidate makes a good decoy.
“Howdy! What a sur-prise, sur-prise….fellow-common-folk-down-south-citizens, ya’ll shoulda seen the purty ducks ‘n geese fly out of the tall “soy bean” blind behind me!”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:05 am:
“Bruce, (sigh) … the only stuffed animals that will fit into the stuff dog’s mouth are the weasel, a cartoonish rabbit, a golf club head cover we found of a Gofer with the initials ‘T’ and ‘C’ stitched on the back… and… a Meerkat that is missing an eye …No, you think about it Bruce, we have time…”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:08 am:
“Mr. Rauner, sir, we have all been patient. The dog looks fine. We are not going to …’paint’ the dog black for a black Lab … we know its stuffed, but its just a prop … how about we take a couple with the dog, yes, with the ears up, nothing in the mouth and keep the dog this color … humor us…”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:11 am:
“Please, Mr. Rauner … it’s stuffed … we can’t make it ’sit’ …the dog is stuffed standing. Yes, …I can see that point …yes, a sitting dog shows like you are the ‘Master’ or whatever you said … but THIS dog …is stuffed …standing …”
- Chi - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:14 am:
Rauner campaign aide: “Sir, when I said you’d need to camouflage your self to have a shot at winning this race, I wasn’t speaking literally.”
- wordslinger - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:20 am:
“So I don’t shoot the dog, right? Where’s my script…..”
- Ready To Get Out - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:23 am:
“What’s the daily limit on unions?”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:26 am:
“Mister. Rauner. We can NOT … have a deer standing next to you… and the dog. Sir, …why… why would a deer be standing with you and ‘your dog’? This isn’t ‘Animal Kingdom’, ok, the only deer we have in the semi is a ’standing deer’ …No! That makes no sense to have the deer standing with you and the dog …you have ‘hunted’, right?…”
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:29 am:
“Yeah, I’m just a regular guy….I love to fish here with my rescue dog Blackie”…..
Blackie: “HELP! This guy just grabbed me 10 minutes ago!”
- Tom - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:34 am:
What season is it? All I saw at the DNR site was early goose and dove.
- wordslinger - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:45 am:
–What season is it? All I saw at the DNR site was early goose and dove.–
Rabbit season! Duck season! Rabbit season! Duck season!
Shhh — be vewwy, vewwy qwyitt. I’m hunting voters, hahahahahha.
Reality has nothing to do with the Rauner campaign. Don’t you remember back in July, when it was 100 degrees all over the state, and he was wearing the Carhartt in his TV spots?
Wasn’t his campaign announcement video set in Canada or Montana or something? Remember those big hills in the background?
The dude is making himself up as he goes along. Apparently, the focus groups found that billionaire, pay-to-play LaSalle Street hedgie, North Shore friend of Rahm doesn’t resonate in a GOP primary.
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:46 am:
“Ok, I think we are ready …Mr. Rauner, stand there, next TO the dog, with the ears up, and you can hold ‘Rodent 615′ from the truck, … yep … just like that … put the shades… yes, on your face, not on the brim of the hat … great … yes! Right foot forward, look natural …No, do not look at the dog, look here sir … the dog is fine … hold the prop up higher, like you are proud you got it … yes … look here … the dog is not going to fall over, its anchored … no, Bruce, the dog looks steady, look here please … no, hold the Rodent higher like ‘Lookey-Lookey’ … tilt the hat just a bit back … I know we can’t SEE your eyes, but we want to see your face … Fix Mr. Rauner’s hat … ok… perfect … Bruce, seriously, look HERE … if you move your head, the hat will move … The. Dog. Does. Not. Need. A. Bandana! Bruce, I am going to take away the dog … I know you want the stuffed dog in the picture …. yes, even though its standing and not sitting, I get it … but the bandana might be too much …(pause) …Yes…Yes, I know you are paying for this … ‘Can somepone find me a bandana for the prop dog?’ … Seriously? ‘Do we have a “red” bandana for the dog?’ … only a black one Bruce … That’s ok? … Now! Now, we have the bandana on the stuffed dog, the sunglasses on, the right foot forward, you are smiling … yes, yes the Rodent in your hand … let’s make some magic …”
- Ghost - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:55 am:
Peasant season! my favorite time of the year…..
- wordslinger - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:05 am:
–Peasant season! my favorite time of the year–
LOL, reminds me of the scene below from “History of the World Part I.” About the 1:28 mark.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sztf4hcGrB4
Appropriate, since I’m sure Farmer Bruce was at Citadel hedgie Griffin’s wedding at Versailles, regular guy that he is.
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:06 am:
Is he hunting Sunflower seeds?
- Mouthy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:13 am:
I’m going Quail hunting with Dick Cheney…
- anon - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:15 am:
It’s dove season, and btw Bruce, it’s illegal to shoot dove over standing sunflowers…
- Skeeter - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:24 am:
More proof that no matter what they do or what they wear or how the pose, a good old boy can become an intellectual but an intellectual cannot become a good old boy.
- wordslinger - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:26 am:
Skeeter, did someone accuse Rauner of being an “intellectual?”
- Skeeter - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:31 am:
Wordslinger, that’s probably one of the more polite words for Rauner. I was thinking “pampered North Shore banker who believes that Kennilworth is living out in the country.”
- zatoichi - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:34 am:
We found this patch of weed as we stepped into the clearing. It is obviously pretty well attended. I did not know it could get this big.
- Anonymour - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:36 am:
You should have seen the clout I had to use to get him into the beat obedience school. Arne had Bo call for me.
- Esteban - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:36 am:
What’s that stuff growing next to me?
- The End Is Near - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:40 am:
“All right, Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up.”
- The End Is Near - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:46 am:
“That reminds me of something my pal Ken Griffin told me last week while we were eating pan-fried squirrel and listening to a jug band at the old Union League Club . . . “
- Observing - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:48 am:
Where’s the blaze orange cap and jacket that are almost universally required. Maybe he doesn’t plan to hunt with Dick Cheney.
- door gunner - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:57 am:
look again, he appears to be holding a rat
- John A Logan - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 9:57 am:
Looks like Dove hunting to me. However I would encourage him to mow down the sun flowers with a bush hog. Everyone knows that doves prefer a dusty field and wont feed directly on the flower, they will only feed on the ground.
- shore - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:03 am:
the tags are still on the camo.
- John A Logan - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:05 am:
Just to clarify, it is not illegal to hunt doves over standing sun flowers. From the Illinois Department of Natural resources Pyramid State Park website.
== Dove hunting hours are 12 noon - 5 p.m. Hunters must participate in a daily lottery at 11:00 am at the Galum Unit office September 1 - 5 to hunt over sunflower or wheat field. No dove hunting is allowed September 1 - 5 within 200 yards of a designated dove mangement field, except for hunters who are part of the hunter quota for that field.
- Grandson of Man - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:09 am:
“I’m just an ordinary Joe, like you.”
- Grandson of Man - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:12 am:
“I took my pandering lessons from Mitt Romney.”
- dupage dan - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:27 am:
Ted Nugent for Governor!
- dupage dan - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:30 am:
G’Day, Illinois, Crocodile Dundee here. Where’s Donk?
- Earl Shumaker - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:35 am:
My friends at the NRA thought this would picture would get me a few more votes.
- Earl Shumaker - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:37 am:
Here’s another one:
“Heh, fellow dogs, doesn’t this man look stupid?”
- The Dragon's Breath - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:40 am:
“Ramar of the Jungle” (after being fitted at his local tailor’s shop) goes out for the first time to hunt for snipe. His native bearer failed to show up to carry the picnic basket and champagne but (clever lad that he is) he found a dog to act as his porter.
- MrJM - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:41 am:
“Bruce, we’ve given him twice the suggested dosage of tranquilizers — so I promise that mean old dog won’t growl at you any more.”
– MrJM
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:58 am:
Rauner the Bruce and his Dove of Piece
- TCB - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 10:59 am:
=It’s dove season, and btw Bruce, it’s illegal to shoot dove over standing sunflowers… =
Adding to what John A. Logan mentioned……….You can indeed hunt over standing sunflowers, You can even mow them down (which works even better) and hunt over that. This can be a little confusing as people get them mixed up with waterfowl laws where you can’t do this sort of thing.
- Empty Suit - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:10 am:
Bruce Rauner holding a fake bird, standing next to a stuffed dog, and a photo shop field and the caption reads “I’m not a politician I’m just an average citizen.”
- Empty Suit - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:10 am:
“Hey this gun is broke!”
- Quizzical - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:12 am:
Varmints mostly. I’ve been hunting varmints since I was 15. At least twice.
- Wensicia - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:17 am:
The scarecrow outfit wasn’t working, so…I’ll fight to the death to protect these sunflowers! BTW, whose dog is this?
- A guy... - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:17 am:
Get me some used shoes and an old dog to go with my new outfit.
- Boutte - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:24 am:
is that Gucci camo
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:45 am:
Bruce Rauner puts forth his proposal for pension reform.
“My proposal not just eliminates all pension costs,” said Rauner, as he held a dove representing State employees, “it generates revenue through hunting licenses, estate taxes, and a variety of other sources.”
Ty Fahner of the Civic Committee of the Commercial Club of Chicago drooled in agreement.
- Realist - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:47 am:
Above was me
- State employee - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:52 am:
“No, I didn’t actually serve in the military. Why?”
- woodchuck - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:53 am:
Thinking of the scene from the movie “The Distinguished Gentleman” when they were out hunting with semi-automatic rifles. One bird drops and Eddie Murphy says “Must’ve had a heart attack.” That’s what happened to whatever rodent Bruce is holding…
- Chavez-respecting Obamist - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:54 am:
Unbelievable.
- woodchuck - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:54 am:
“This is my rifle. This is my gun.”
- siriusly - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:55 am:
Odd bird.
- Ghost - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:55 am:
Word, History of the World part 1 was my insperation
- Ghost - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:58 am:
On a side note, the is the most immacualte looking hunting outfit and dog I have ever seen.
AT least if I use duck dynasty commercials as a template
- aufjunk - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:01 pm:
He forgot his can of Skoal.
- Darienite - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:03 pm:
Bruce gets ready for his guest appearance on The American Sportsman. “Hey, do I get to meet Curt Gowdy?
- Steve - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:07 pm:
” I wore this same outfit when Rahm and me went on vacation.”
- Quizzical - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:08 pm:
My valet had to fly to London twice to get these bespoke cammo shirt and trousers made.
- woodchuck - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:09 pm:
“C’mon and get some some, Marty Huggins!” Cam Brady 012, support the troops.
- AKC Fan - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:32 pm:
Rich wouldn’t let me rent Oscar, so this is the best I could come up with on such short notice.
- JoeD - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:32 pm:
I like to picture any of the other candidates in the same type of picture… kind of funny to envision.
- danray - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:32 pm:
“I always “go commando” when I hunt out of season.”
- 47th Ward - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:49 pm:
Vote for me or I’ll shoot this dog.
- Earl Shumaker - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:54 pm:
I support the Constitutional right to bear arms, but do not support the Constitution when it comes to protecting pensions
- lost in the weeds - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:55 pm:
Why am I wearing camp?
- lost in the weeds - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:56 pm:
Whoops. Why am I wearing camo?
- polisciguy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 12:58 pm:
Forgot my fishing line.
- Obama's Puppy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 1:19 pm:
I also wear this outfit when I swim in my money pool.
- siriusly - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 1:23 pm:
Sure I’ve been hunting before. I always spend two weeks a year at my country house.
- Polisciguy - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 1:51 pm:
I just limited the term of this rodent.
- The End Is Near - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 2:00 pm:
“Hi, I’m Bruce Rauner. A lot of you know me as “Mr. September” from the “2013 Men of Cabela’s Calendar.”
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 3:30 pm:
Hunting over a standing sunflower field is poor hunting ……The doves always eat their food from the ground; they normally never peck it off a plant
- 4 percent - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 4:12 pm:
New camouflage clothes - $100
New shotgun - $500
Trained hunting dog - $1,500
Bruce Rauner’s Candidacy - Priceless
- Artis Gilmore - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 4:30 pm:
Shades of Dukakis in the tank
- regular democrat - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 5:35 pm:
He probably shot himself in the foot due to his lack of knowledge of a shotgun. I like the commercial where he has the Carhart construction jacket on and has construction workers in the backround as he bashes unions. That is priceless. I sure hope the fine citizens of downstate Ill are smart enough not to fall for this clown it is pathetic.
- And the horse they rode in on! - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 6:18 pm:
“Rep. Brandon Phelps has nothing on me when it comes to pandering to the gun nuts.”
- Calhoun Native - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 6:19 pm:
Solo camo and ammo photo of fido and honcho with ego.
- Just The Way It Is One - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 8:18 pm:
Just TOO funny to even comment (chuckle, chuckle, chuckle)…!!!
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Sep 4, 13 @ 11:26 pm:
I have not been this intrigued since the speculation as to whether Jackson Pollack hid his name in the “Mural” started a while back.