“And I just ride that Harley, the union made Harley… ‘Vrummmm’… and the ignorant rubes I fool just eat it up. I laugh thinking about all the stuff I do to mock these people and they still support me… ‘Vrummmm’… I just laugh and laugh at them.”
So I said, “listen Holcomb, I was making millions while Mitch Daniels was still in short pants. I just dropped $100Ke on your campaign, I don’t care if it’s a bunch of lies, you’ll read that script the way I wrote it or you’ll be lucky to get a job washing cars when you’re done in Indy. Capiche?”
We went to the go kart track last night. They had a Madigan look alike in the kart in front of me. I chased and chased and rammed him. Wow it was great.
Hey can you ask Uline to return my calls?
Yeah, I got this cheap van that I drive with two hands on the wheel like this, some Carhartts and that’s all it took to fool enough people all the time. Cracks me up every time I think about it.
It’s hilarious to see the looks I get when I am driving around in the trash can van, being escorted by a bunch of state troopers with their jelly bean lights going.
So I pulled David Koch in real close and wispered sweet nothings into his ear and he opened up his checkbook. That’s how you do it.
- igotgotgotgotnotime - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 7:48 pm:
The wheels on the bus fell off and off, off and off, off and off,
The wheels on the bus fell off and off, And it was all Madigan’s fault. (repeat 10 thousand times)
- MG85 - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:22 pm:
“I can’t believe you lost a primary election to the guy who drives a fire truck like this!”
- Dance Band on the Titanic - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:22 pm:
This is the face I make when wearing my motorcycle costume.
- DEMogorgon - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:22 pm:
“And then I said I was going to ‘Shake Up Springfield!!!’”
- Dozer - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:25 pm:
an actual tie
- Union Dues - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:26 pm:
In my hands is the list of my successes as Governor.
- Dozer - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:26 pm:
new scandal alert: counsel Gen of Israel to Midwest and Scott walker are the same dude.
- Oswego Willy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:27 pm:
“And I just ride that Harley, the union made Harley… ‘Vrummmm’… and the ignorant rubes I fool just eat it up. I laugh thinking about all the stuff I do to mock these people and they still support me… ‘Vrummmm’… I just laugh and laugh at them.”
- Anon - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:27 pm:
“VROOM! VROOM! Then I passed that poseur Madigan and made him eat my dust!”
- Anonymous - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:30 pm:
“Here’s how I drive those CapitolFax commies nuts”
- former southerner - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:34 pm:
Guess which hand hides the combination to the safe holding my IL master destruction plan.
- Anon221 - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:34 pm:
OW for the early win:)
- Huh? - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:35 pm:
I get so mad at being out smarted by Madigan that I just start to shake and get red in the face.
- Give Me A Break - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:35 pm:
Her name is Ives, she’s about this tall.
- Huh? - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:37 pm:
I was holding up my Harley vest this morning trying to figure out what flare I would wear on my suit coat.
- cdog - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:39 pm:
“I literally drove the entire state into the ditch (exclamation point)”
- 47th Ward - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:40 pm:
So I said, “listen Holcomb, I was making millions while Mitch Daniels was still in short pants. I just dropped $100Ke on your campaign, I don’t care if it’s a bunch of lies, you’ll read that script the way I wrote it or you’ll be lucky to get a job washing cars when you’re done in Indy. Capiche?”
True story.
- Huh? - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:40 pm:
Help me put on my new coat.
- Huh? - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:43 pm:
I huffed and I puffed but I couldn’t blow down Madigan’s house.
- We'll See - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:43 pm:
“I’ve been milking the “Shake-up Springfield” line for four years!
- Huh? - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:44 pm:
I don’t know how you do it, governin’s hard work.
- Passive Agressive - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:47 pm:
“This is how you drive a state off the cliff.”
- Oswego Willy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:48 pm:
“Then Diana grabbed my shoulders and said.. (snicker-snicker) ‘who cares what they think. We own the party’. What fools”
- We'll See - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:50 pm:
“I’ve been milking the “shake-up Springfield” line for four years.”
- Annonin' - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 12:53 pm:
We went to the go kart track last night. They had a Madigan look alike in the kart in front of me. I chased and chased and rammed him. Wow it was great.
Hey can you ask Uline to return my calls?
- We'll See - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:00 pm:
“My grandparents were immigrants from Israel and they taught me how to milk cows like this on a farm in Wisconsin.”
- @MisterJayEm - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:02 pm:
“I choose to fight.”
– MrJM
- Peorgie Tirebiter - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:09 pm:
See how my boxing skills are about the same quality as my governing skills
- Joe Bidenopolous - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:12 pm:
Then that mean old Madigan said we couldn’t have right to work and I just got SOOOO MAD
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:15 pm:
this is how i escorted goldberg out the door
- PublicServant - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:17 pm:
Yeah, I got this cheap van that I drive with two hands on the wheel like this, some Carhartts and that’s all it took to fool enough people all the time. Cracks me up every time I think about it.
- Huh? - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:21 pm:
So I was holding my first budget up like this, just trying to keep from laughing in Madigan’s face, knowing the budget was so unbalanced …
- Pale Rider - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:28 pm:
Who has two thumbs and hates Mike Madigan? This guy!
- @MisterJayEm - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:29 pm:
– MrJM
- Free Set of Steak Knives - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:30 pm:
Rauner Demonstrates His Swedish Grandfather’s Cow-Milking Technique
- A guy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:37 pm:
Best hundred grand I ever spent. Thanks man.
- TinyDancer(FKASue) - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:40 pm:
Hey, Scott - look at my my turn-around, man:
First, I trashed the state’s economy.
Then, I recruited red state governors to raid our businesses.
Next, I’ll hold my breath ’till I turn blue.
- A guy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:41 pm:
Go ahead, “Cuff me”.
- Oswego Willy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:55 pm:
“I grabbed the Cardinal by the shoulders, put a lil scowl on my face and said ‘You have my word’… (snicker-snicker) MY word, Amirite?”
- Oswego Willy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:56 pm:
“I told Ken Dunkin… ‘I’ll help you… (snicker-snicker)… you have my word’… these guys trust anything I say… “
- Oswego Willy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 1:58 pm:
“I said ‘Christine, I’ll support your deal (snicker-snicker) I won’t undercut you… “
- Redraider - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 2:03 pm:
So I said to myself” if Scott Walker can get Policy passed to drive teachers out of his State, why can’t I pursue policy to get rid of the kids?”
- The End Is Near - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 2:20 pm:
“And when Bob McNair said that ‘we can’t have the inmates running the prison,’ it was as if we’d written his remarks for him . . .”
- zatoichi - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 2:30 pm:
I just snap my fingers and I am back on stage with the Shadows of Knight “G..L..O..R..IIII.A, Gloria, You make me feel so good”. That was a time.
- Anonish - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 2:51 pm:
So I erased the Etch-A-Sketch and started my legislative strategy all over again.
- Honeybadger - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 3:26 pm:
“Boyyyyyy, this is gonna be great” in Flounders voice from Animal House.
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 4:05 pm:
need a hug
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 4:07 pm:
don’t touch me munger just did my nails
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 4:12 pm:
this is me locked up behind bars next year
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 4:22 pm:
here’s your thirty shekels
- Flapdoodle - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 4:34 pm:
“So I sit in my little red fire truck holding the wheel like this and I peddle as hard as I can but don’t ever get anywhere . . . .”
- Capitol View - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 4:46 pm:
wiped out two tunnels from Indiana to Illinois Chambers of Commerce in eastern part of state…
- Wensicia - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 4:47 pm:
“I shook up Springfield and forced Madigan into retirement, Scott.”
“Um, Bruce, that was Lisa, not Mike.”
“Yeah, but it’s still a great victory.”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 5:09 pm:
“I coulda been somebody. I coulda been a contender.”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 5:10 pm:
“My favorite is the one where they dump the alum in the punch, and Larry takes a big gulp and goes…”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 5:17 pm:
“Then I put the pedal to the metal on the trashcan van and plowed right through that Democrat roadblock.”
- Arthur Andersen - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 5:18 pm:
“Wouldn’t I be great in NASCAR?”
- Oswego Willy - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 5:19 pm:
“Then I told Rahm… ‘No… (snicker-snicker) YOU go get your shine box’… “
- Streator Curmudgeon - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 5:24 pm:
“Then I held up that tuna fillet — and believe me, it was stinky — and I told one my aides, ‘Oh, he’ll get the message, all righty.’”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 5:26 pm:
“I picked up the Tribune, read that headline, and I did one of those spit takes, just like Sid Caesar.”
- Huh? - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 6:06 pm:
It’s hilarious to see the looks I get when I am driving around in the trash can van, being escorted by a bunch of state troopers with their jelly bean lights going.
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 7:20 pm:
i used to be 6′8″ till madigan gave me an atomic wedgie
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 7:29 pm:
I snap like a dry twig
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 7:34 pm:
Fisticuffs links
- Generic Drone - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 7:44 pm:
So I pulled David Koch in real close and wispered sweet nothings into his ear and he opened up his checkbook. That’s how you do it.
- igotgotgotgotnotime - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 7:48 pm:
The wheels on the bus fell off and off, off and off, off and off,
The wheels on the bus fell off and off, And it was all Madigan’s fault. (repeat 10 thousand times)
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 8:06 pm:
illinois is worth fightin for
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 8:10 pm:
madigan is right you are a weakling
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 8:22 pm:
What are you doing here? Where is the most powerful person in Illinois at
- Anonymous - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 8:57 pm:
Rauner shows off his persistent rascal face.
- BaronvonHammer - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 9:25 pm:
Yes, I own a tie.
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 9:53 pm:
upstarts
- Rabid - Monday, Oct 30, 17 @ 10:26 pm:
dysfunctional thumbs up
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 7:40 am:
funky chicken
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 7:47 am:
Koch creeps
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 7:55 am:
showcasing his bus pushing skills
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 8:02 am:
grasping facts out of the air
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 8:07 am:
trick or treat
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 8:23 am:
two fisted drinking party technique
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 8:35 am:
no bruce i don’t see them bugs flying around your head
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 8:52 am:
gouging Illinois good
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 9:21 am:
you an i together again
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 2:39 pm:
diana said i look better riding with no helmet
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 2:41 pm:
this is how I’m going to rip the guts outta Indiana
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 2:47 pm:
duking it out in the land of david
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 5:19 pm:
Thank-you bruce Rauner
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 8:10 pm:
pennywise loses his balloons
- Rabid - Tuesday, Oct 31, 17 @ 8:43 pm:
frail old man reaching out for his walker
- Rabid - Wednesday, Nov 1, 17 @ 8:28 am:
Scott I do two things nothing and rubbing peoples face in it
- Rabid - Wednesday, Nov 1, 17 @ 8:32 am:
can i try out for kosher salami for Milwaukee park
- Rabid - Wednesday, Nov 1, 17 @ 9:30 am:
I got carpal tunnel from shaking Illinois
- Rabid - Wednesday, Nov 1, 17 @ 9:36 am:
so then Diana said I would drive them nuts
- Rabid - Wednesday, Nov 1, 17 @ 10:20 am:
I wonder whats in the papers back home
- Rabid - Wednesday, Nov 1, 17 @ 11:17 am:
Downhill racer
- Rabid - Wednesday, Nov 1, 17 @ 3:47 pm:
I thought these oberwise ice cream cones would of made it
- Rabid - Thursday, Nov 2, 17 @ 1:46 am:
dads home state take 32 drop the script Bruce
- Rabid - Thursday, Nov 2, 17 @ 3:20 am:
slinging the bull by the horns
- Rabid - Friday, Nov 3, 17 @ 7:26 am:
I’m looking foreign intelligence
- Rabid - Friday, Nov 3, 17 @ 7:59 am:
I’m the king from the nation of illliois
- Rabid - Friday, Nov 3, 17 @ 8:00 am:
I have a really narrow focus