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Caption contest!

Monday, Aug 29, 2011

* That would be Mayor Rahm Emanuel wearing a pink bathing cap in the Chicago Triathlon

Let’s keep it clean, people. I only brought up the pink cap to get the subject out of the way. Do not “go there,” OK? I’d like to be able to continue parking my car on the street when I visit my favorite big city. Don’t get yourself banned for life because I want to save myself from nasty retaliation. Seriously. Thanks much.

- Posted by Rich Miller        

  1. - Skeeter - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 6:17 am:

    A warning to Quinn, Madigan, Hynes and anybody else considering running for gov in four years:

    We’ve seen the numbers Rahm can do when he runs for office. Now he’s ready to run, swim and bike for office. Get out of the way or be prepared to be run (biked, so swam) over.

  2. - Michelle Flaherty - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 6:50 am:

    The only thing missing is Yoda on his back.

  3. - Newsclown - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:08 am:

    (sniff, sniff) “Man, I have GOT to fix those sanitary canal problems!”

  4. - OneMan - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:10 am:

    Mayor Emanuel smiles after confirming the location of Pat Quinn’s political future after giving the mayor flack about the Chicago Casino.

  5. - Wensicia - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:12 am:

    All we need is the music of “Swan Lake” playing in the background.

  6. - OneMan - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:13 am:

    When asked if he knew how Governor Quinn ended up with a coho salmon on his desk mayor Emanuel said he had no idea and then asked one of the reporters if he had ever seen the show Hillbilly Hand Fishing.

  7. - Give A Break - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:13 am:

    When Quinn offered to buy me the swim cap, he didn’t say it was pink

  8. - Give A Break - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:14 am:

    Sorry Rich, posted before I saw the Pink Cap warning. I will now flog myself to repent.

  9. - Aldyth - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:24 am:

    I am the very model of a modern Big City Mayor.
    I’ve information vegetable, animal, and mineral,
    I know the powers of Washington and I quote the fights historical.
    From Clinton White House to Obama, in order categorical;
    I’m very well acquainted, too, with matters budgeterial.
    I understand politicians, both the simple and maniacal.
    About governing theorem I’m teeming with a lot o’news.
    With many cheerful facts about what Quinn is really up to.

    I’m very good at understanding the fine art of negotiation.
    I know the closet contents of politicians ‘cross the nation.
    In short, in matters political at every layer,
    I am the very model of a modern Big City Mayor.

  10. - Wild in Illinois - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 7:52 am:

    I can hear his response to the obvious question, “Don’t confuse me with someone who cares.”

  11. - OneMan - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 8:10 am:

    When asked to respond to the photo of Mayor Emmanuel Governor Quinn said..

    “He got to swim in Lake Michigan, a mighty lake, a great lake, that is here in Illinois, he rode a bike, it wasn’t a Schwinn a fine bike that used to be made here in Illinois, with an Ipass so he didn’t have to stop and pay any tolls, he ran on roads, fine roads, roads that the Illinois tax payer helped fix tax payers from South Beliot to Cairo helped fund, fixed roads that do not have my name on the signs about the project. Why, because I do not look for publicity for such things. Roads that use asphalt, made from in part stone from this fine state and it’s fine quarries, holes dug, in the ground, deep holes where limestone is extracted that processed by working people and placed on the ground, in the land of Lincoln, ground that he then ran upon. He had to breath air, fine Illinois air, some that has been exhaled by other people from Illinois, perhaps even some atoms that Lincoln himself breathed.

    I tried to reach out to him during the race, I was there, near an aid station with a bottle of V-8 from my fridge but he took a pass.

  12. - thechampaignlife - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 8:26 am:

    The most powerful person in the state taking telecommuting literally.

  13. - ILPundit - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 8:44 am:

    I would have chosen a different cap, but the rest all had a reservoir tip.

  14. - Cincinnatus - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 8:49 am:

    2514. The number of times Pat Quinn has screwed up since being elected Governor.

  15. - Boone Logan Square - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:04 am:

    Illinois Defense Forces Agent Emanuel emerges from Monroe Street Harbor. He swam across the southern portion of Lake Michigan after blowing up the Hammond casino.

  16. - Alias - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:13 am:

    Hah! Rich Daley never did this!

  17. - sad - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:19 am:

    In his best vladimir putin impression yet, rahm flexs for the cameras.

  18. - Old Shepherd - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:27 am:

    He once had an awkward moment just to see how it felt. He’s won trophies for his game face. When he pats you on your back, you list it on your resume. Mayor Emanuel doesn’t always drink beer, but when he does, he drinks Dos Equis.

  19. - Commonsense in Illinois - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:31 am:

    Heh…let’s see Bloomberg do this!

  20. - siriusly - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:36 am:

    I love the smell of dead alewives in the morning.

  21. - JBilla - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:38 am:

    Rahm Emanuel: There’s something you need to know, Jay. You’re not the only athlete here in Chicago. I happen to be training for a Triathlon right now. Doin’ a lot of running, and cycling, swimming. Well you know all about that.

    Jay Cutler: No actually I don’t. I do SPORTS. Not try to be the best at exercising.

    Congrats Rahm, I think I can do the running and the biking, but swimming a half mile in Lake Michigan is no joke.

  22. - Oswego Willy - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:40 am:

    “He swims in Lake Michigan, becuase going by boat bores him.

    He has been known to call the Ironman, his ‘Cool Down’.

    When he wears Spandex, it’s called Rahm-dex to show respect.

    Others fear the bike stage, his bike fears HIM.

    Others run next to him, because the smell of his sweat is better than Gatorade.

    They hide the clock at the end of the race, so he doesn’t embarrass other contestants.

    While others fight to get water during the race, the volunteers fight to give him his water.

    He is … the Most Interesting Mayoral Athlete in the World.”

    “I don’t always run these races, but when I do, … it’s in Chicago”

  23. - Oswego Willy - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:42 am:

    “Did I lose that Bluetooth again?”

  24. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:50 am:

    His wife actually let him out of the house like that?

  25. - Oswego Willy - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:53 am:

    “OK, I want you to tweet, ‘Out of the water, and on to the bike’, and then get the press release ready about swimming and how I am navigating the uncharted waters of Mayor of Chicago.

    Also, get a shot of me on the bike, and tweet, ’see, the bike paths are worht every penny’, and then send the grant proposal for the new bike paths … ooops, sorry … no, not you, just another runner …

    Then make sure Sneed gets this …’Rham-bo? Was that Mayor Emanuel coming in, then insert whatever place I get, in the triathalon? Was that Ed and Anne Burke giving him a towel at the finish line? Stay tuned.’.

    Ok, heading towards the next stage, talk to you later.”

  26. - QC - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 9:56 am:

    My son, Zack, told me how to do the Freestyle and it worked!

  27. - Lulabell - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:03 am:

    Rahm showing his softer feminine side

  28. - Tom B. - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:04 am:

    Great comment One Man. Great comment.

  29. - OneMan - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:18 am:

    Rahm returns after another unsuccessful yet rewarding search for Al Capone’s lost underwater casino…

  30. - Steve - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:24 am:

    Mayor like me needs protection.

  31. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:29 am:

    Women in the background: “Oh, no…look straight ahead (turn away)…don’t make eye contact whatever you do…keep walking…faster…what does one say in a situation like this?…awk-ward.”

  32. - mokenavince - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:30 am:

    It’s nice to see a Mayor in great shape and without a beer belly. All pols should a note.

  33. - anon sequitor - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:30 am:

    From Pink, the singer:

    Everywhere that I go
    There’s someone waitin’ to chain me
    Everything that I say
    There’s someone tryin’ to short change me
    I am only this way
    Because of what you have made me
    And I’m not gonna break!

    You can push me out the window
    I’ll just get back up
    You can run me over with your 18 wheeler truck
    And I won’t give up
    You can treat me like a slave
    I’ll go underground
    You can run me over with your 18 wheeler but
    You can’t keep me down, down, down

  34. - JayKing - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:41 am:

    Not your father’s Mayor. Or his father either for that matter.

  35. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:48 am:

    Swimmin’ with da fishes in Chicago today: bodywear (orca) or concrete masonary blocks (orco)?

  36. - Irish - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:51 am:

    I am sorry that I cannot come up with something “cute” to say.

    My caption is “What a person who knows he has nothing to prove wears to the beach.”

    PQ needs to look closely at this picture and ask himself ” Do I really want to mess with this guy?”

  37. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 10:53 am:

    (Ditto on what Tom B. said. Way to go, OneMan!)

  38. - Judgment Day - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:08 am:

    Actually, great idea (seriously). This way his security team has an easier way to keep track of him as he is out on the course.

    I doubt that any of us (certainly including myself) are in anywhere near as good of physical condition as Rahm is (running a freaking Triathlon!).

    I’m with Irish on this one.

    As an aside, I’m just wondering what shape his security detail is in. Requirement 1: “At minimum, you have to be in the same physical condition as our current Mayor”.

  39. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:10 am:

    The Democrats finally find a visual to replace Peter’s “speedo” campaign ad and Aaron’s “eggplant” abs photo layout in voter’s mind. (I hope this doesn’t spark off a never-ending competition. I don’t know how much more we can take.)

  40. - Loop Lady - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:12 am:

    Oh God my hair, I take a lot of time with my hair, and I don’t want anything to mess it up…including Lake MI water…

  41. - zatoichi - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:21 am:

    Mango lives!

  42. - wordslinger - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:23 am:

    The staffer who supplied the pink cap will soon be at the bottom of Lake Michigan.

  43. - just sayin' - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:28 am:

    On the catwalk yeah….on the catwalk….I do my little turn on the catwalk….

  44. - Alias - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:29 am:

    “I can see a thousand _______ skylines, and they are all as ________ glorious as the first, and I can feel the touch of my friends.”

  45. - D.P. Gumby - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:36 am:

    Quinn (thinking) “Damn, I was going to wear that hat in the Pride swim!”

  46. - Irish - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:38 am:

    See, I think a lot of folks are missing the point of the cap. If you think Rahm didn’t know exactly what he was doing by wearing the cap, you are wrong. It’s very much an in your face statement. “This is the cap I chose to wear, you want to make something of it?”

    It reminds me of my sophomore year in high school. Long hair was the fad and school officials were fighting it at every turn. Being sent to the barber in the middle of the school day and dry shaving students side burns were the norm. When swimming started in PE kids with long hair, mine touched the top of my ear lobes, were told they had to wear swim caps. I went down to the Woolworths and bought a bright orange one that was covered with plastic flowers. I wore it the whole six weeks we had swimming. They had more problems with the tiny pieces of flowers that came off the\an they ever did with any hair I lost. LOL

  47. - amalia - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:50 am:

    Rahm figures the only way we will notice his buff bod is if we say
    “there goes a pink cap!”

  48. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:53 am:

    Dear Lord, Irish. Why are you encouraging them? What next? They’re all going to shave their heads like Sinead O’Connor and run around singing “Don’t Cry For Me Argentina”?

  49. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:55 am:

    Or, “Nothing (um, No One) Compares To You (um, Me)?”

  50. - What's in a name? - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:56 am:

    I am actually happy he’s the Mayor.

    I like Irish @ 10:51.

  51. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:58 am:

    Cue Daley: “Now that’s silly…just silly…silly that is….did I say “silly” yet?”

  52. - justbabs - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 12:05 pm:

    Real men support Breast Cancer Awareness every day.

  53. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 12:08 pm:

    Immediately after crossing the finish line in 1:36:50 in the Sprint division, the Mayor filed suit for his time to be counted in, and him declared winner of, the longer Professional division (winning time 1:50:23). The Mayor claimed his intent was always to be part of the Professional division.

  54. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 12:12 pm:

    Poseur. (You, too Anon 12:08.)

  55. - OneMan - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 12:22 pm:

    Actually Irish, they give you the cap, different sections have colors sometimes (regardless they make you wear it and it is usually a distinct bright color) it makes it easier for the lifeguards on the swim section to see you if you are having issues..

    Yes I have done a triathalon before (stop laughing Rich) ironically I was not the largest guy to finish (close however).

  56. - lincolnlover - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 1:22 pm:

    “Runnin’ south on LSD, headin’ inta town”

  57. - @all - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 1:23 pm:

    In other news, in the name of efficiency and cost effectiveness, the U.S. Department of Justice has announced it has started issuing pre-prisoner identification numbers to all elected officials in Illinois.

  58. - Tommydanger - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 1:32 pm:

    Seeking to best the combined tenure of the Daleys, Mayor Emanuel has taken to tatooing on his arm the projected date he intends to step down from his position as Mayor.

  59. - Tommydanger - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 1:32 pm:

    sorry, that’s tattooing

  60. - GMatts - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 1:43 pm:

    Running,swim,bike….run,swim,bike….or..was it….wondered why I was the only one in the lake…

  61. - friend of a friend - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 1:56 pm:

    “I don’t know what to do first, fix my cap or remove the wedgie… ok my cap first”

  62. - Indeedy - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 2:00 pm:

    Thanks for calming the waters with the cap info, One Man. You took the words right out of my mouth. The Mayor, however, has put some new ones in, namely, “Holy cow, he’s ripped!”

  63. - SoufSide - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 2:37 pm:

    I am THE most interesting mayor in the world!

  64. - ChitownHV - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 2:43 pm:

    “i’m a little teapot, short and stop. Here is my handle an dhere is my spout.”

  65. - ChitownHV - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 2:44 pm:


  66. - Michelle Flaherty - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 3:08 pm:

    So we’ve noticed the symbolism of positioning of the Mayor’s arms.
    Looks like an “S” as in Senate.
    Hmmmm. And then look at that code on his shoulder and upper arm: 2514.
    2+5= 7
    5-1= 4
    4 … 4


    Senate 744.

    Rahm’s sending code to Quinn to sign the Gaming Bill.

  67. - Rich Miller - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 3:12 pm:

    Michelle Flaherty wins. Nobody has ever before put so much bizarre mental effort into a caption contest.

  68. - jt - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 3:37 pm:

    Beside bike lanes, maybe we should have swim lanes too.

  69. - wilecoyote - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 4:18 pm:

    BTW, all entrants were given the same colored pink swim caps for that portion of the event. At least the 10 or so photos I saw of other swimmers all were wearing pink ones.

  70. - VanillaMan - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 8:38 pm:

    Brilliant. Wearing pink cap keeps dorsal fin from being noticed.

  71. - bored with press - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:00 pm:

    Yes, I have to agree. Michelle Flaherty DOES win. That caption is nuts.

  72. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:04 pm:

    ===Nobody has ever before put so much bizarre mental effort into a caption contest.===

    That’s not fair, Rich. You never said that would be a consideration in determining a winner in the caption contest.

    *Putting bizarre mental effort (theta programming) into “breaking” the blog.

    I know. “Bite me.”

  73. - Anonymous - Monday, Aug 29, 11 @ 11:04 pm:

    Hey…on second thought: Maybe that’s what Rham was doing. ;)

Sorry, comments for this post are now closed.

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