I got the horses in the back
Horse tack is attached
Hat is matte black
“Got the boots that’s black to match
Ridin’ on a horse, ha
You can whip your Porsche
I been in the valley
You ain’t been up off that porch, now”
I’m gonna put two dimes on “Honeyrose” in da sixth. She’s a mudder, and mudder her times are off da charts
I’m gonna parlay “Joker’s Delight” and “Room Service Garbage”, and I’m gonna box em, trow 3 dimes on dat.
Da Guv’s Special? Dis new entry, ooh its a doozy. Put 4 dimes on “Snobby Elitist Trash”. It’s goin off at 12 to 1, but what good about it, dat number is gonna drop, so get your tickets now… “
- Three Dimensional Checkers - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:18 pm:
I like #4, Nature’s Metropolis, in the 6th race.
- 360 Degree TurnAround - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:24 pm:
“Hey, aren’t you the IPI guy?”
- dbk - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:24 pm:
“Speaking as the owner of a $12 million horse farm in Florida.”
- 360 Degree TurnAround - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:25 pm:
Fake news reporter interviews governor.
- Three Dimensional Checkers - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:26 pm:
You can always tell the winners at the starting line.
- 360 Degree TurnAround - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:27 pm:
The governor continued “I’m gonna take that horse to the old town train, and I’m gonna riiiiddde till I can’t no more”.
- A guy - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:28 pm:
Winning by a nose means different things to different noses.
- 360 Turnaround - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:29 pm:
I got the horses in the back
Horse tack is attached
Hat is matte black
“Got the boots that’s black to match
Ridin’ on a horse, ha
You can whip your Porsche
I been in the valley
You ain’t been up off that porch, now”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:29 pm:
“Me?
I’m gonna put two dimes on “Honeyrose” in da sixth. She’s a mudder, and mudder her times are off da charts
I’m gonna parlay “Joker’s Delight” and “Room Service Garbage”, and I’m gonna box em, trow 3 dimes on dat.
Da Guv’s Special? Dis new entry, ooh its a doozy. Put 4 dimes on “Snobby Elitist Trash”. It’s goin off at 12 to 1, but what good about it, dat number is gonna drop, so get your tickets now… “
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:37 pm:
As a kid, i owned ponies, horses, eventually a casino. It’s best to own the games, not play them. Is this being taped?
- zatoichi - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:41 pm:
I was gonna jockey, but the saddle just did not fit right.
- Louis G. Atsaves - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:43 pm:
The new bill will bring in this much revenues . . . oh, wait, I meant even more revenues . . . oh wait . . .
- Commonsense in Illinois - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:46 pm:
No…John Goodman is from St. Louis - I was born in California.
- Gruntled University Employee - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:47 pm:
I got this system see, I think what would Bruce Rauner do and then I do the opposite. It’s worked every time so far.
- Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:53 pm:
“Slots in the paddock. Need I say more?”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 4:58 pm:
“Hey, I’m at the racetrack and I’m not wearin’ a costume. Forget about it.”
- Bigtwich - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:01 pm:
This guy says the horse can do.
- Jocko - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:08 pm:
Our money troubles are solved. On a tip, I put this year’s budget on ‘Because Madigan’ in the 6th.
- Practical Politics - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:10 pm:
You and the horse you rode in on…
- Huh? - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:25 pm:
Listen, when walking around the paddock, you gotta watch out for those horse apples. They’ll ruin a new pair of shoes faster than anything.
- Klaus VonBulow - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:29 pm:
Why didn’t my staff pack me a seersucker suit for this auspicious occasion at the horse Downs.
Anybody want a mint julep?
- Annonin' - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:39 pm:
Hey IPI guy tell GovJunk I signed another bill he vetoed today.
- JS Mill - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:44 pm:
“Ya see, I am the type o’ guy that means what he sez. I told all a you that I would make Brucie go bye bye and poof, he gone!”
- Huh? - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 5:45 pm:
Listen, when bettin’ on horses, you gotta consider the track. If it’s muddy, bet on a long shot. Da favorites usually don’na like it when it’s wet.
- JJJJJJJJJJJ - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 6:04 pm:
Media around here spends too much time covering the horserace.
- Woodstock willy - Tuesday, Jul 30, 19 @ 6:11 pm:
In the interest of fairness, I am putting 2 bucks to win on every nag running at fairmount today. Pretty sure I will win every race !
- Flynn's Mom - Wednesday, Jul 31, 19 @ 9:07 am:
In my best Jackie Gleason voice, “How sweet it is”.