(Thinking to himself) “my wife says I look like Gary Cooper. .maybe this is working. Why couldn’t they give one of those big hats with the round dingy things hanging over the brim..man those things are cool”
“Hello, y’all, Joel Daly and the Sundowners couldn’t make it today, so we’ll be your entertainment. We’re the Good Ole Boys, and I’m Bruce, lead singer, driver of the Winnebago…”
In a way, all of us has an El Guapo to face. For some, shyness might be their El Guapo. For others, a lack of education might be their El Guapo. For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous man who wants to kill us. But as sure as my name is Lucky Day, the people of Santa Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo, who also happens to be *the actual* El Guapo!
“So, you just get everyone to say they like the Turnaround Agenda and ‘ck’ from my office will get your group’s name and she’ll send it out an email to Miller right away… “
Saying “Hey I had a Mexican friend once…I’ve even ate a burrito or two..see I’m just like you guys”. (But thinking )..”what are all these landscapers doing here?”
Pretty sure this is the same shirt he wore to the Dead show. Just added a motorcycle vest and a $25 western hat.
This guy may have large bank, but you would never be able to tell by his attire.
- Because I said so... - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:23 pm:
“Since I was a child
I’ve tried to be what I’m not
I’ve lied and I’ve enjoyed it all my life
I lied to my dear mother
to my sisters and my brother
and now I’m lying to my children and my wife
Big Hat, no cattle
Big head, no brain
Big snake, no rattle
I forever remain
big hat, no cattle
I knew from the start
Big boat, no paddle
Big belly, no heart
Can’t remember why I do it,
Oh, maybe I can.
An honest man these days is hard to find.
I only know we’re living in an unforgiving land.
And a little lie can buy some real big piece of mind.
Oftimes I wondered what might I have become,
Had I but buckled down and really tried.
But when it came down to the wire
I called my family to my side
Stood up straight, threw my head back and I lied, lied, lied
Big hat, no cattle
Big shoes, well you know…
Big horse, no saddle
He goes wherever I go
Big hat, no cattle
Right from the start
Big guns, no battle
Big belly, no heart
When it came down to the wire
I called my little family to my side
Stood up straight, threw my head back and I lied, lied,lied
lied, lied, lied
Big hat, no cattle
Big head, no brain
Big snake, no rattle
I forever remain
Big hat, no cattle
I knew from the start
Big boat, no paddle
Big belly, no heart
Big boat, no paddle
Big belly, no heart”
I really think the Governor should be drinking Dos Equis.
Not because he is all that interesting, but because he has struck out at least twice on enacting his public labor reforms.
“I’m sticking with the incongruous motorcycle and cowboy costumes for now. But when the temperature drops below 50 you had better believe I’m throwing a Carhatt over this outfit.”
Gov “I was hopin Clint could film a movie in this here great state of Illinois. If only Madigan would give me that durn Turnaround agenda so we could bring the film credits back.”
Old distressed leather vest:check
Genuine cowboy hat:check
American flag sticker:check
Scuffed up cowboy boots:check
Well worn jeans :check
Mexican beer in hand:check
$50,000 Rolex watch :Oops!
It may be a day of celebration of Mexican culture, but get it though your head amigos that I’m not wearing one of those sombreros. I have a reputation to project. I’m one of the good guys. I wear a white cowboy hat.
Let me see here. Am I on the set of ‘No Country for Old Men’ today or is it ‘True Detective’? Cause its gettin’ might a bit surreal round Illini town lately. Maybe sumpin’ at that Dead Head festival soaked into my veins. This cerveza just ain’t cuttin’ it.
“20 years in the State Police. I’ve been shot at, puked on, and rescued people outta snow banks in blizzards. I’m finally tapped for Executive Security and this goof wants me to dress like this? I knew I shoulda voted for Quinn.”
- Ghost - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:56 pm:
“they cant have their vest back!”
- ihpsdm - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:57 pm:
Watch me turn around this vest.
- 47th Ward - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:58 pm:
Budget? We don’t need no stinking budget!
- RNUG - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:58 pm:
You know, this whole budget thing is turnin’ into a spaghetti western. I just need to get a few more partners for my posse …
- Mark - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:58 pm:
the look on the face of the Mariachi is priceless
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:59 pm:
“No I don’t have any cattle…”
- Timmeh - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:59 pm:
He made his security detail dress up too.
- Rich Miller - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 12:59 pm:
What do I think of Donald Trump? Um, well, uh. Oh, look, a squirrel!
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:00 pm:
“I think I memorized the wrong talking points…”
- PublicServant - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:01 pm:
Giro de vuelta! Si! Mi amigo.
- SallyD - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:01 pm:
Is the Governor drinking Donald Trump light?
- OurMagician - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:01 pm:
Me siento incompleto con mi Carhartt.
- Nick Danger - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:01 pm:
I don’t always drink beer but when I do, I prefer Modelo.
- cez - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:01 pm:
(Thinking to himself) “my wife says I look like Gary Cooper. .maybe this is working. Why couldn’t they give one of those big hats with the round dingy things hanging over the brim..man those things are cool”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:01 pm:
“Is that Mike Z wearin’ the chaps?”
- Downstate - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:01 pm:
Isn’t that the same “plaid” shirt that he wore to the Dead show? If so there’s a lesson there about being able to adapt.
- Still Workin' - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:02 pm:
I’m a model governor
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:02 pm:
“No, I don’t speak English either…”
- Aschockedobserver - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:02 pm:
The shakiest gun in the Midwest
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:03 pm:
How do you drop your “g’s” in Spanish?
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:03 pm:
“Oh geez, get Sandack off the mule, he looks ridiculous… “
- Suburbanon - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:04 pm:
Is that Madigan wearing a Clint Eastwood outfit? Dad gummit. He’ll do anything to make me look bad.
- Sue Ellen Mischke - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:04 pm:
The Dude abides… (and sweats)
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:04 pm:
“Wow. Those are real horses, aren’t they… “
- Team Sleep - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:05 pm:
“A Burns for All Seasons will now be shown at 7:00. Thank you.”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:05 pm:
“Is that a windmill out yonder?”
- Anon221 - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:06 pm:
https://twitter.com/GovRauner/status/622527090634661888
What was he doing with the machete!!!
- Aschockedobserver - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:07 pm:
Mike and John are comin’ soon for the Three Amigos sequel
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:07 pm:
“Hello, y’all, Joel Daly and the Sundowners couldn’t make it today, so we’ll be your entertainment. We’re the Good Ole Boys, and I’m Bruce, lead singer, driver of the Winnebago…”
- A Jack - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:07 pm:
Let’s round up the boys and take down that Trump tower. It’s ruinin’ my view of the Tribune building.
- Aschockedobserver - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:08 pm:
thats the look the guy gave when Rauner asked for a Dos Equis
- A guy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:11 pm:
Go back and tell your Committeeman the Alamo was a picnic compared to this.
- Suburbanon - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:11 pm:
And is that Cullerton, dressed as Zorro?
Si Senor.
- Aschockedobserver - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:12 pm:
Mongo like candy
- Mittuns - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:12 pm:
In a way, all of us has an El Guapo to face. For some, shyness might be their El Guapo. For others, a lack of education might be their El Guapo. For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous man who wants to kill us. But as sure as my name is Lucky Day, the people of Santa Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo, who also happens to be *the actual* El Guapo!
- @MisterJayEm - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:12 pm:
“They gave me a nickname! Sombrero Burro means Strong Bull, right?”
– MrJM
- A guy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:12 pm:
No you cannot ride my horse Harley D, but I’ll race you.
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:13 pm:
The Good, the Bad, the Not So Hot.
- Mittuns - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:13 pm:
Mamas don’t let your babies grow up to be panderers.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:13 pm:
“Well, I now know where baby horses come from…”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:15 pm:
“I’m channeling Bon Jovi. Bon Jovi. You know, ‘Steel horse I ride’… (Sips beer. Pause) forget it.”
- IllinoisBoi - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:15 pm:
Where’s my badge? Don’t Governors get to wear a badge?
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:17 pm:
“Budgets? We don’t need no stinking budgets.”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:18 pm:
“…’Evelyn watch out for the cow pie.. Ev… Ev!’ … (Pause)… Too late. Hope your insurance is payed up.
- Slippin' Jimmy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:18 pm:
Say Amigo, ya got any of this here Modelo in the bottle?
- Aschockedobserver - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:18 pm:
They told me the event would be full of bull, apparently they meant just me :/
- Ipso Facto - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:19 pm:
“So Chuy, introduce me to this Chapo friend of yours.”
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:20 pm:
“So, you just get everyone to say they like the Turnaround Agenda and ‘ck’ from my office will get your group’s name and she’ll send it out an email to Miller right away… “
- Mittuns - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:20 pm:
Mariachi band member: Governor, does your worker’s compensation reform include restrictions on personal injury claims sustained from embarrassment?
Rauner: Si.
- Slick Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:21 pm:
And that mi amigo was how the vest was won…
- cez - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:21 pm:
Saying “Hey I had a Mexican friend once…I’ve even ate a burrito or two..see I’m just like you guys”. (But thinking )..”what are all these landscapers doing here?”
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:22 pm:
Governor Gringo
- bloval27 - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:23 pm:
Mariachi: Why does a guy with a billions steal my modelo?
Rauner: That’s why I have Billions my friend, takes a sip “Ahhh” the good life.
- Jake From Elwood - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:23 pm:
Pretty sure this is the same shirt he wore to the Dead show. Just added a motorcycle vest and a $25 western hat.
This guy may have large bank, but you would never be able to tell by his attire.
- Because I said so... - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:23 pm:
Oh Poncho…Oh Cisco!
- Aschockedobserver - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:23 pm:
They misspelled Charo. Wheres she at? coochie-coochie
- Omega Man - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:24 pm:
“Since I was a child
I’ve tried to be what I’m not
I’ve lied and I’ve enjoyed it all my life
I lied to my dear mother
to my sisters and my brother
and now I’m lying to my children and my wife
Big Hat, no cattle
Big head, no brain
Big snake, no rattle
I forever remain
big hat, no cattle
I knew from the start
Big boat, no paddle
Big belly, no heart
Can’t remember why I do it,
Oh, maybe I can.
An honest man these days is hard to find.
I only know we’re living in an unforgiving land.
And a little lie can buy some real big piece of mind.
Oftimes I wondered what might I have become,
Had I but buckled down and really tried.
But when it came down to the wire
I called my family to my side
Stood up straight, threw my head back and I lied, lied, lied
Big hat, no cattle
Big shoes, well you know…
Big horse, no saddle
He goes wherever I go
Big hat, no cattle
Right from the start
Big guns, no battle
Big belly, no heart
When it came down to the wire
I called my little family to my side
Stood up straight, threw my head back and I lied, lied,lied
lied, lied, lied
Big hat, no cattle
Big head, no brain
Big snake, no rattle
I forever remain
Big hat, no cattle
I knew from the start
Big boat, no paddle
Big belly, no heart
Big boat, no paddle
Big belly, no heart”
Randy Newman
- Jake From Elwood - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:25 pm:
I really think the Governor should be drinking Dos Equis.
Not because he is all that interesting, but because he has struck out at least twice on enacting his public labor reforms.
- Etown - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:30 pm:
Tell these boys there is a new sheriff in town and Modelo is the beer of his choice
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:34 pm:
So what do you think of Donald Trump? We’re both rich Republicans, you know.
- 13thone - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:36 pm:
Tell me again how you got here?
- cez - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:37 pm:
“Ich bin eine Mexicano!”
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:38 pm:
Rauner new nick name
“The Sheriff”
- Ipso Facto - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:39 pm:
“Chuy, so explain it to me … slowly this time… he hid it with the secretary of state?”
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:47 pm:
Seriously, he’s beginning to get the look, hunch/stoop of Montgomery Burns. Except Burns would have been a sharper dresser.
- Ipso Facto - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:49 pm:
“I need something catchy … a jingle to go with the twenty mil.”
- Rich Miller - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:52 pm:
=== beginning to get the look, hunch/stoop===
Pictures can lie.
I don’t see that in person.
- Sam Weinberg - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:54 pm:
“I’m sticking with the incongruous motorcycle and cowboy costumes for now. But when the temperature drops below 50 you had better believe I’m throwing a Carhatt over this outfit.”
- Governor Simulacrum
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:55 pm:
“Say, uh, ponder/señor. You got any Chateu d’Yquim chasers ’round here”?
- Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:56 pm:
“I’m gonna either have to gain some weight or start shoppin’ in the ‘Tall and Emaciated’ section.”
- AC - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:58 pm:
The more Modelo he drinks, the more momentum he sees
- No Longer A Lurker - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:58 pm:
What? Are gringos falling from the sky?
- Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 1:58 pm:
“No! The back of the vest says ‘Harley Davidson,’ not ‘Snarly Davidson.”
- Todd - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:12 pm:
There is this guy I’m looking to interview next week, his name is Jose JalapeÑo on a steek.
- AC - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:13 pm:
You mean the Madigan government on one side? Maybe the unions on the other side? Me right smack in the middle?
- cez - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:16 pm:
“Boy…beer that tastes like warm urine..having to be outside with insects flying around..Ick! I bet Trump never had to do this stuff.”
- Tom K. - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:18 pm:
“I not have belly ache like this since I was little boy….”
- AC - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:21 pm:
There’s a storm comin’
- bluecollargal - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:33 pm:
Gov “I was hopin Clint could film a movie in this here great state of Illinois. If only Madigan would give me that durn Turnaround agenda so we could bring the film credits back.”
- VanillaMan - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:39 pm:
I have enough “yes” people around me. Time for some diversity and get some “si” people.
- VanillaMan - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:40 pm:
I like Mexico - tried to buy it once, but there wasn’t any easy profit in it.
- Jorge - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:41 pm:
“El Chapo is mine. Got that mine!”
- not applicable - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:43 pm:
“After I’m done with this here MODEL-O, bring me one of those 3 X beers”
- ihpsdm - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:47 pm:
I do want to build a wall, but I’ll just turn it around. So no need to worry, amigo.
- VanillaMan - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:50 pm:
If I break it, I can then own it.
- Empty Suit - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:54 pm:
“Oh Pancho” “Oh Cisco”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7PMWhLBMlQ
- Empty Suit - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:56 pm:
“Yep Black Bart Madigan is hold up at the old mine shack. We’re gonna have to go smoke em out..partner”
- VanillaMan - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:57 pm:
If there was a way to get those $50 a month folks down to Mexico, they’d really love it, wouldn’t they?
- Empty Suit - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:58 pm:
“Time to go do some ridin, ropin and shootin”
- Owls Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:58 pm:
The only type of appropriation I can support is cultural.
- cez - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 2:59 pm:
Old distressed leather vest:check
Genuine cowboy hat:check
American flag sticker:check
Scuffed up cowboy boots:check
Well worn jeans :check
Mexican beer in hand:check
$50,000 Rolex watch :Oops!
- vole - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 3:06 pm:
Waitin’ for the Trump posse.
- Throwin Stones - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 3:25 pm:
Reporter: Mr. Bush, why are you drinking?
Rauner: Madigan, wait, what?
- Commonsense in Illinois - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 3:36 pm:
El Jefe Deflato
- Wensicia - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 3:36 pm:
MrJM wins.
- A guy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 3:48 pm:
It looks like the only way to deal with Mr. Madigan is to call in the Federales!
He just bought the locals a new escuela. Gonna have to get some guys from the Old Country to get the job done.
- Nickname #2 - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 3:54 pm:
Looks a little like Peter Weller (robocop)…
http://comicsbulletin.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/long23.jpg
- HeavyB - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 4:10 pm:
The 1% badge on his biker vest doesn’t mean the same for him as everyone else.
- Joe M - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 4:12 pm:
It may be a day of celebration of Mexican culture, but get it though your head amigos that I’m not wearing one of those sombreros. I have a reputation to project. I’m one of the good guys. I wear a white cowboy hat.
- Wordslinger - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 4:21 pm:
I can’t wait for the guv’s keynote at the Internationial Men of Leather Convention at the Hyatt next year.
- Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 4:27 pm:
“Wow, great costume. Say,… you see a construction worker, cop, and an Indian Chief, a biker, and a sailor around the grounds?”
- Mongo - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 5:05 pm:
Dear Governor,
please eat somethin’
please
- vole - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 5:15 pm:
Let me see here. Am I on the set of ‘No Country for Old Men’ today or is it ‘True Detective’? Cause its gettin’ might a bit surreal round Illini town lately. Maybe sumpin’ at that Dead Head festival soaked into my veins. This cerveza just ain’t cuttin’ it.
- Tired - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 6:12 pm:
Banned words don’t begin to describe this… Sigh
- zatoichi - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 6:39 pm:
Mariachi: He took my chew can.
- Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 6:43 pm:
“20 years in the State Police. I’ve been shot at, puked on, and rescued people outta snow banks in blizzards. I’m finally tapped for Executive Security and this goof wants me to dress like this? I knew I shoulda voted for Quinn.”
- downstate commissioner - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 6:54 pm:
for those who might know a “chew can” is what a person spits their chewing tobacco in-
Zatoichi wins!!!
- downstate commissioner - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 6:57 pm:
Raunevich thinking: “I hope no one notices that I am not drinking an Illinois beer!!”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 7:33 pm:
“Senor Governor, are you on a hunger strike until the budget passes?”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 7:34 pm:
“That is the plumb ugliest little horse I ever…huh? Why, sure, I knew it was a goat. I was just joshin’ ya!”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 7:36 pm:
Rauner: “How’d this apple stem get in my cerveza?”
- Michelle Flaherty - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 9:58 pm:
Stringbean lives!
Ganamos!
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 11:47 pm:
Saddle up boys were riding to rock ridge
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 11:49 pm:
Yep that’s madigans smoke signal over yonder
- Anonymous - Tuesday, Jul 21, 15 @ 11:54 pm:
Goldberg sure makes a good piñata
- Lynn S, - Wednesday, Jul 22, 15 @ 12:50 am:
Maybe I’m missing something, but isn’t the leather biker vest an inappropriate sartorial choice for this gathering? It’s Beecher, not Sturgis.
Any fashion police on this blog who can help out?
- Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner - Wednesday, Jul 22, 15 @ 6:12 am:
Who is that gaucho, amigo?