Rod Blagojevich jogs to the Fox Chicago headquarters and stares blankly in the front window hoping for a chance to appear on the station’s Sunday morning program.
“In it’s quest to bring you fair and balanced news, Fox Chicago will replace seasoned journalists who report on people in the news with the people who are actually in the news. This week we introduce our new political reporter, Rod Blagojevich, and next week you will meet our new food critic, Betty Loren Maltese, and our criminal correspondent, Drew Peterson.”
- The End Is Near - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:58 pm:
“I challenge the government to release all the photos from this December 2008 photo session. Patrick Fitzgerald knows that nearly all of the pictures snapped that day demonstrate my innocence. Be a man, Mr. Fitzgerald, and release all the photos.”
The United States Attorney for the Northern District of Illinois often question him, just because they find him INSIPID.
His HAIR alone has experienced more than a lesser man’s body.
His blood smells like FRIED CHICKEN.
He is the most REVILED man in the world.
He is Milorad Blagojević, “Rod”
He will go to FEDERAL PRISON for a Long Long Time.
He is the most interesting man in the world.
“So yeah, you were saying you make $25,000 a year taking these pictures, is that right? Well, you know, that’s enough to get yourself a senate seat if you’re, you know, interested in that kind of thing.”
Nike Dry-Fit running jacket - $59
Quick spritz of Alterna Caviar Anti-Age Hair Spray - $25
Ride to federal building - courtesy of Pat Fitzgerald
Having your mugshot posted on Capitol Fax Blog - PRICELESS
I’ll Get Through This, Naturally! - Gilbert O’Sullivan, enhanced by VanillaMan
In a little while from now
Before the public I’ll vow
I’m an innocent man, they’d understand
I’ve always been able to wow
In my climb to the top, in an FBI eavesdrop
In their effort to, bid me adieu
So they can pass higher taxes later
Leaving voters in the lurch, or at church
Where they’d be saying, “My God, that’s tough
The Governor’s in cuffs”
Another celebrity arraigning
Roland’s on the phone
Begging for Obama’s throne
I’ll get through this, naturally
To think that only yesterday
I was the Top Dog, as they say
To Democratic cheer, I had no fear
About the scam I was about to play
But as if to knock me down
Reality came around
In a budget crunch, with a political punch
Shredded it into little pieces
Leaving me to doubt
I could count on Rezko raising
Millions I would need to have
To satisfy my DC craving
In this hour of need, I’m certain yes, indeed
I’ll get through this, naturally
It seems to me that there is a way out
Out of this mess, it can’t be mended
Left unattended
What do I do? What do I do?
Now looking back over the years
And whatever else that appears
I remember I whined, when Patti dined
On a spider in Prime Time
Never wishing to be a chump
I was an apprentice to Donald Trump
But he couldn’t understand
Why an innocent man
Couldn’t be his guide to new fortunes
Forcing me to part, but I’m too smart to be jokin’
Despite every attempt by me
The Donald’s hair is broken
Everyone is just jealous of me
As they burn me in effigy
I’ll get through this, naturally!
I realize that Fox deserves credit for somehow getting hold of this mug shot — I’ve never been a fan of mug-shot journalism, but that’s another topic — but if your organization didn’t take the photo and doesn’t own it, what’s the propriety of slapping your logo on it?
You, too, can learn how to free-fall without a parachute from 30,000 feet above the ground. Just sign-up for Patti’s and my $500 correspondence course called “Rod’s Exhilarating Free Falling Without A Chute”.
- Pat collins - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:33 pm:
“Illegal campaign soliciting. Just don’t do it”
- Pat collins - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:34 pm:
Seriously, though, does that not DEFINE the
“deer in the headlights” look or what?
- El Conquistador - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:37 pm:
“Is my hair ok? SERIOUSLY…is my hair ok? Where’s that trooper with the football?”
- Obamarama - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:37 pm:
For a man that prides himself on his hair, he really doesn’t take very good care of his eyebrows.
- Some Guy - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:37 pm:
“Would you buy a used car from this man?”
- Rich Miller - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:39 pm:
Rod Blagojevich jogs to the Fox Chicago headquarters and stares blankly in the front window hoping for a chance to appear on the station’s Sunday morning program.
- 47th Ward - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:39 pm:
It’s basically an up day.
- Secret Square - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:40 pm:
I guess we just solved the problem of what to do about Blago’s official Capitol portrait….
- Stooges - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:41 pm:
I wore my best jogging suit for this?
- Stooges - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:42 pm:
I wonder if I can still appoint myself as Senator
- John Bambenek - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:42 pm:
“Mayor Daley sticking something up, you know”
- CircularFiringSquad - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:43 pm:
Guess Fox wants us to believe that have stolen Blagoof away from WLS just like they got Flannery from CBS.
- Secret Square - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:47 pm:
“Would you buy a (slightly) used Senate seat from this man?”
- Obamarama - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:49 pm:
===It’s basically an up day.===
Win.
- phocion - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:50 pm:
“Ok, Jimmy. This isn’t funny anymore.”
- KeepSmiling - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:51 pm:
Could we please get some children around me for this picture?
- BIG R.PH. - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:52 pm:
“I am not a crook”
- Rich Miller - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:53 pm:
Uh-oh, I shoulda worn the Swoosh shirt. Now I’m gonna lose my endorsement deal.
- Ghost - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:53 pm:
Don step on my blue seude shoes….
- And I Approved This Message - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:54 pm:
Rod Blagojevich arrives at the Fox Studios for the casting call for the role of Captain Kirk.
http://media.photobucket.com/image/captain%20kirk/113890405/captainkirk.jpg?o=58
- Rich Miller - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:55 pm:
Where’s Bradley Tusk when you need him?
- zatoichi - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:56 pm:
What..me worry?
- ugh - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:58 pm:
“In it’s quest to bring you fair and balanced news, Fox Chicago will replace seasoned journalists who report on people in the news with the people who are actually in the news. This week we introduce our new political reporter, Rod Blagojevich, and next week you will meet our new food critic, Betty Loren Maltese, and our criminal correspondent, Drew Peterson.”
- The End Is Near - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:58 pm:
“I challenge the government to release all the photos from this December 2008 photo session. Patrick Fitzgerald knows that nearly all of the pictures snapped that day demonstrate my innocence. Be a man, Mr. Fitzgerald, and release all the photos.”
- The Gerry - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 12:59 pm:
Look straight at my eyes, Mr. Fitzgerald… You’re getting sleepy…. so sleepy…. Dammit, look at me, man!
- Vote Quimby! - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:00 pm:
Can I get back in the fetal position now?
- Anon - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:03 pm:
That Barack kid told me it’s George Bush’s fault
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:04 pm:
“Caught in the hen house! Story at 10!”
- Northside Bunker - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:05 pm:
The United States Attorney for the Northern District of Illinois often question him, just because they find him INSIPID.
His HAIR alone has experienced more than a lesser man’s body.
His blood smells like FRIED CHICKEN.
He is the most REVILED man in the world.
He is Milorad Blagojević, “Rod”
He will go to FEDERAL PRISON for a Long Long Time.
He is the most interesting man in the world.
- Steve Downstate - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:06 pm:
“So yeah, you were saying you make $25,000 a year taking these pictures, is that right? Well, you know, that’s enough to get yourself a senate seat if you’re, you know, interested in that kind of thing.”
- Vote Quimby! - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:07 pm:
And I’m gonna take down Obama, and Reid, and Madigan, and Durbin…..(repeat ad nauseum)
- Pat Robertson - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:10 pm:
“No, I won’t give you my autograph. My autograph is bleeping gold!”
or
“Oh, bleep. I do look like Mayor Daley!”
- Budget Watcher - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:18 pm:
Man, I hope Lou will still take my calls.
- "Old Timer Dem" - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:19 pm:
This is what happens when you don’t do as your father-in-law says.
- Siriusly - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:22 pm:
Anyone can take my picture. If you want to take my picture go ahead, I dare you. Wait, my hair!
- Bluefish - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:22 pm:
Nike Dry-Fit running jacket - $59
Quick spritz of Alterna Caviar Anti-Age Hair Spray - $25
Ride to federal building - courtesy of Pat Fitzgerald
Having your mugshot posted on Capitol Fax Blog - PRICELESS
- Amalia - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:27 pm:
Jailhouse Rock
- just sayin' - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:27 pm:
“Everybody in the whole cell block…was dancin’ to the jail house rock.”
- Tom B. - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:28 pm:
No caption, but I’m positive this is what was running through his head.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HKDxP1psns
- just sayin' - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:29 pm:
dangit! Honestly Amalia, I didn’t steal your post. It was great minds thinking alike.
- Aldyth - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:44 pm:
There has to be something in there about the right to a comb. Where’s my lawyer?
- Pothole - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:44 pm:
I told you it was a Right Wing conspiracy - Rubert Murdoch is behind this.
- Responsa - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:49 pm:
C’mon Rod, let a smile be your umbrella
Just let a smile be your umbrella,
On a rainy, rainy day . . .
And if your sweetie cries, just tell her,
That a smile will always pay . . .
Whenever skies are gray,
Don’t you worry or fret,
A smile will bring the sunshine,
And you’ll never get wet!
So, let a smile be your umbrella,
On a rainy, rainy day . . .
(How did this mugshot stay under wraps for so long?)
- 4 percent - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:50 pm:
Any press is good press
- Vole - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:50 pm:
“Next stop — Letterman! I made it!”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:54 pm:
“Think, think … Who am I going to blame??”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:56 pm:
“I picked a great day to forget the ‘footbal’ “
- Ken in Aurora - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 1:57 pm:
“Derrrrrrrrrrrrrr…”
- UISer - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:04 pm:
Rich,
Any idea why it took so long to get it? Seems like every other dime a dozen crook gets their mug shot released immediately.
- Rich Miller - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:05 pm:
Federal mugshots aren’t usually released.
- Ooops - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:06 pm:
mommy…
- MrJM - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:07 pm:
And this is why you don’t pick a fight with your father-in-law.
– MrJM
- UISer - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:07 pm:
Thanks
- WRMNPolitics - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:07 pm:
Would you buy a used state from this man?
- tominchicago - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:09 pm:
“I saw a werewolf drinking a Pina Colada at Trader Vics
His hair was perfect….”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:12 pm:
“Rod, you’re my son-in-law, and I love you. But don’t ever take sides with anyone against the Family again. Ever.
- anon - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:14 pm:
BLEEP YOU!
- Macbeth - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:19 pm:
Wow — that’s a real live Alfred E. Newman.
“What me worry?”
- HiFi - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:22 pm:
“Man, getting arrested is a real bummer. But on the plus side, I get to have my picture taken.”
- VanillaMan - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:23 pm:
I’ll Get Through This, Naturally! - Gilbert O’Sullivan, enhanced by VanillaMan
In a little while from now
Before the public I’ll vow
I’m an innocent man, they’d understand
I’ve always been able to wow
In my climb to the top, in an FBI eavesdrop
In their effort to, bid me adieu
So they can pass higher taxes later
Leaving voters in the lurch, or at church
Where they’d be saying, “My God, that’s tough
The Governor’s in cuffs”
Another celebrity arraigning
Roland’s on the phone
Begging for Obama’s throne
I’ll get through this, naturally
To think that only yesterday
I was the Top Dog, as they say
To Democratic cheer, I had no fear
About the scam I was about to play
But as if to knock me down
Reality came around
In a budget crunch, with a political punch
Shredded it into little pieces
Leaving me to doubt
I could count on Rezko raising
Millions I would need to have
To satisfy my DC craving
In this hour of need, I’m certain yes, indeed
I’ll get through this, naturally
It seems to me that there is a way out
Out of this mess, it can’t be mended
Left unattended
What do I do? What do I do?
Now looking back over the years
And whatever else that appears
I remember I whined, when Patti dined
On a spider in Prime Time
Never wishing to be a chump
I was an apprentice to Donald Trump
But he couldn’t understand
Why an innocent man
Couldn’t be his guide to new fortunes
Forcing me to part, but I’m too smart to be jokin’
Despite every attempt by me
The Donald’s hair is broken
Everyone is just jealous of me
As they burn me in effigy
I’ll get through this, naturally!
- Oswego Willy - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:23 pm:
“I knew it … I should have stayed at the Mansion last night …”
- VanillaMan - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:27 pm:
Update -
Instead of the line, “What do I do? What do I do?”
I meant to write, “Who do I screw? Who do I screw?”
- The Mad Hatter - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:28 pm:
It’s Howdy Doody Time!
- Plutocrat03 - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:32 pm:
You lookin at me? Wacha looking at?
Do I make you laugh?
- Oswego Willy - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:34 pm:
“Now it makes sense … George said ‘See you soon’… then this … I get it!”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:36 pm:
“Remember, at booking, your address is 1060 W. Addison … Later, it will confuse the Bejeezus out of them!”
- Responsa - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:41 pm:
Hmmm, which department shall I charge my defense expenses to?
- blue skies - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 2:50 pm:
who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?
- henry - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:09 pm:
This arrest should prove my virility
- Reformer - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:19 pm:
“D’oh! I’m screwed.”
- Anonymous - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:20 pm:
Patty wants a what, a divorse you say? Whew! not quite yet!
- really? - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:21 pm:
forget about it?
- Anon - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:26 pm:
Beam me up, Scotty!!!
- What the. . . - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:31 pm:
If that dude’s eyes converge any more, you can start calling him Cyclops.
- Former Titan - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:45 pm:
Crap. I knew I shoulda hit the brows and temples with Just For Men last night.
- Steve - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 3:55 pm:
You know who I am.
- Leave a light on George - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 4:52 pm:
if you can’t say nothin’ nice don’t say nothin’ at all.
- wordslinger - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 4:58 pm:
Fox unveils the intellectual underpinning of its world view.
- jaded voter - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 4:59 pm:
Hey smug guys,
The joke is on you! Most of you voted for me TWICE!!
- Eric Zorn - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 5:02 pm:
I realize that Fox deserves credit for somehow getting hold of this mug shot — I’ve never been a fan of mug-shot journalism, but that’s another topic — but if your organization didn’t take the photo and doesn’t own it, what’s the propriety of slapping your logo on it?
- jaded voter - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 5:03 pm:
Can you all say HUNG jury? Thanks nimRODS.
- Amalia - Friday, May 21, 10 @ 5:30 pm:
Just sayin’ at 1:29, hoisting a much needed friday cocktail to ya right now. synchronicity!
- Northside Bunker - Saturday, May 22, 10 @ 10:36 am:
He truly has no upper lip….
- anon - Sunday, May 23, 10 @ 7:04 am:
This is all Mike Madigan’s fault. I told you he was evil.
- Concerned Voter - Sunday, May 23, 10 @ 7:54 am:
DUH!
- Festus Hagen - Sunday, May 23, 10 @ 9:15 am:
You, too, can learn how to free-fall without a parachute from 30,000 feet above the ground. Just sign-up for Patti’s and my $500 correspondence course called “Rod’s Exhilarating Free Falling Without A Chute”.