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Caption contest!

Wednesday, Mar 28, 2012

* First Place winner of yesterday’s caption contest goes to 47th Ward for this entry beneath a photo of Comptroller Judy Baar Topinka and Senate Republican Leader Christine Radogno

Welcome to the GOP Family Feud!

100 people surveyed, top 5 answers on the board: name an Illinois Republican who can get elected in a Democratic district.

Tom Swiss: X
Fred Crespo: X
Mitt Romney; X

Sorry ladies. Let’s see the answers: Jim Edgar, Jack Franks, Skip Saviano, Ronald Reagan and Abraham Lincoln.

However, I know who 47th Ward is, and I know he can afford to contribute to Lutheran Social Services Illinois, so he gets in free to my birthday party today (Boone’s, starts at five o’clock, goes to closing, $20, $5 for legislative staff and secretaries), but he has to make a $50 donation to LSSI.

* Second Place goes to the inimitable Wordslinger for this play on The Godfather, Part II…

JBT: “Buffers, yeah that’s right. The party had a lot of buffers.”

CR: “I don’t know nothing about that. I have my own caucus, Senator.”

If Wordslinger cannot attend, I will randomly choose a person today and grant that person free admission.

* Honorable mention goes to OneMan. I liked his comment the best, but he can’t make it to Springfield today…

Judy and Christine sit in stunned silence after Lisa Madigan and Mike Madigan do the exact same “Who’s on First” bit they had rehearsed.

* OK, on to today’s caption contest. Chicago Sun-Times columnist Carol Marin is one of the roasters at this Saturday night’s black tie optional charity event. Carol actually called my brother Doug yesterday for background info on me. Here’s a lesson for anyone planning a roast: Never, ever invite a reporter to be on the panel. She also has my father’s phone number and I am more than a little concerned about what else she may dig up.

So, I’ve decided to comically retaliate in advance. Here’s Carol showing off her tattoo last year…

And, yes, that’s a real photo. From a Time Out Chicago article

Carol Marin Chicago Sun-Times columnist, NBC 5 political editor, Chicago Tonight correspondent and…body inker? Yes, the 62-year-old, arguably Chicago’s most venerable journalist, has a tat—and she’s proud of it. Nine years ago, Marin’s son, then 16, approached her about wanting his own tattoo. “Joshua had been a great kid, so I said, ‘I’ll go with you, I’ll get one, too,’ ” she recalls. Joshua went with a sun; Mom chose a multicolored compass—both placed on their right shoulders. It’s a nod to her directional impairment. “Also,” she explains, “I went looking for a peace symbol but all had ghoulish faces and skulls in the background.” As the artist finished up her piece, Marin says, an 18-year-old girl with purple and yellow hair approached. “She looked up at me and said, ‘Does it hurt?’ I said, ‘A little bit.’ So she said, ‘Oh, I think I’ll just get my tongue pierced.’ I said, ‘Oh, honey, it’ll chip your teeth. Think about a tattoo.’ ”

Winner receives free entry to my birthday party at Boone’s, which starts today at 5 o’clock. All proceeds from the $20 entry fee ($5 for legislative staff and secretaries) benefit Lutheran Social Services of Illinois. [ADDING: I’ll post the winner’s name at the door today.]

We will have a 50-50 raffle (the winner will be announced tomorrow on the blog), and we’ll have a couple things for sale and auction. For instance, this…

* David Vite of the Illinois Retail Merchants Association claims to have worn out his shoes walking precincts for Sen. Kirk Dillard, so we’ll auction them as well…

- Posted by Rich Miller        

  1. - OneMan - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 9:44 am:

    Carol Marin while a great reporter, soon realized that it was a little hard to check a compass on ones own back.


    Illinois Review just posted a piece about how Carol’s compass seems to point to the left…


    Unfortunately Carol would not show the reporter the tattoo she got of Jerry Springer on her kiester…


    Carol would not comment on the reports that she also has a Shatner Rules tattoo…

  2. - Kasich Walker, Jr. - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 9:45 am:

    “The aliens have landed!”

  3. - OneMan - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 9:47 am:

    , ‘Oh, honey, it’ll chip your teeth. Think about a tattoo.’ ”

    – The punchline to at least two expected jokes at the roast…

  4. - Anonymous - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 9:49 am:

    Not the first Marin with a tattoo.

  5. - Spliff - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 9:52 am:

    Cullerton said we were all getting tattoo’s for the Roast but I was the only one who showed up!

  6. - Captain Illini - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:00 am:

    “I know it’s a compass, but for some reason no matter what I do I seem to always go left.”

  7. - Skeeter - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:08 am:

    Tomorrow’s Illinois Review headline:

    Further proof that Democratic Propaganda Machine requires members to wear secret identifying markings. In case you had any doubts.

  8. - Meier's Half Full Glass - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:15 am:

    After irrecoverably botching George Peabody’s courtly goatee, Kat Von D asked Carol where she stood on compasses…

  9. - Anonymous - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:20 am:

    The Vite photo reminds me of Adlai Stevenson’s “immortal sole”:

  10. - Burrito Bandit - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:21 am:

    Not to steer off topic, and I know this is principally a state political blog, but Bobby Rush just got kicked off the House Floor for wearing a “hoodie.” I think that’s friggin’ golden.

  11. - TCB - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:24 am:

    Marin, reporter, shows off the compass tattoo on her right shoulder. Not pictured: the tattoo on her left shoulder which reads “Thanks for the headlines” above a small portrait of former Governor Rod Blagojevich.

  12. - wordslinger - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:31 am:

    Casting Director: “Yes, Ms. Marin, We get it. You’re an investigative reporter. And it’s a lovely green tattoo. But we’ve decided to go with Rooney Mara because she’s not so, um, well, um, Irish.”

    Happy Birthday, Rich. Sounds like a swinging time for a great cause, but this old Lutheran altar boy has business up north.

  13. - Yellow Dog Democrat - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:33 am:

    Marin Reveals Longtime Crush on Captain Jack Sparrow

    “For some reason, my compass isn’t so good at finding corruption, but I can always find more wine,” the watchdog reporter lamented. From Saputo’s. Sitting in Mike Madigan’s chair. Talking to Rich Miller. And of course, sipping wine.

  14. - Anonymous - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:34 am:

    “Please don’t confuse this with my moral compass.”

  15. - dupage dan - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:51 am:

    Hey, I got this great tatoo @ CapFaxInk!

  16. - mark walker - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:52 am:

    Now show me yours.

  17. - How Ironic - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:57 am:

    Voice over tinny speaker:

    “Now turn to your left, no smiling”

  18. - bidder - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 10:58 am:

    I asked for a peace sign, but the tattoo guy got lost connecting the dots, so I ended up with this thing.

  19. - Anonymous - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:04 am:

    It was Dan Rather’s idea. I knew I shouldn’t have gone drinking with him.

  20. - unclesam - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:06 am:

    Caption for Vite photo: “You have about 10 seconds before I show you exactly what these shoes were made for.”

  21. - The Captain - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:07 am:

    Point of clarification, are you auctioning off an actual bottle of vodka, or just a drawing of one? Important.

  22. - Rich Miller - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:10 am:


    It’s just a sign.

  23. - The Captain - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:10 am:

    “See, told ya. Now let me see your tramp stamp Rich.”

  24. - Rich Miller - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:12 am:

    The Captain, just asking here, not declaring anything yet, but do you live in or near Springfield?

  25. - OneMan - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:58 am:

    == The Captain, just asking here, not declaring anything yet, but do you live in or near Springfield? ==

    You gonna show him your tramp stamp?

  26. - zatoichi - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 12:01 pm:

    Compass tats = the gateway to the entire road Hog lifestyle. Preferring wine straight from a screw top bottle or a box is next.

  27. - train111 - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 12:06 pm:

    If you look closely, you’ll see that this is a tatoo of Rod Blagojevich’s hairpiece.


  28. - Papa2008 - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 12:32 pm:

    “Are you trying to seduce me, Mrs. Marin?

  29. - Anonymous - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 12:38 pm:

    Carol’s tattoo explains everything.

    Reporter rumble!

    It’ll be the Snarks (Miller) versus the Jests (Marin)!

    (Hat tip: West Side Story.)

  30. - OneMan - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 12:49 pm:

    When your Jest
    you are a Jest all the way
    From your first paper bankruptcy
    to your very last day

    When the gov gets arrested
    and Sneed is congested
    You got a joke
    or at least a smoke

  31. - Punley Dieter Finn - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 1:04 pm:

    Tattoed Marin in Vites’ holey soles.

  32. - Michelle Flaherty - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 1:12 pm:

    If only Vite had worn out his shoes two years ago.

  33. - View from the Cheap Seats - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 1:15 pm:

    While i enjoy The Captain’s remarks on the caption, he did touch on the most important issue — whether alcohol or a photo is being auctioned off. Way to flush it out Captain.

  34. - absolutely - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 1:20 pm:

    The sign comes from an end of session party a number of years ago. It’s approximately poster size. It’s on a foam core board. One of a kind. Great for any political junkie. Bid high!

  35. - Bitterman - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 1:39 pm:

    Papa, I could actually hear Hoffman’s voice…

    nice one

  36. - mokenavince - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 1:44 pm:

    You’ll walk the floor and wear out your shoe’s,you’ve learned your 1st lesson to learn’n the blues. Sinatra 1955!

  37. - Rich's Daddio - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 2:03 pm:

    Just spent nearly an hour on the phone with Ms Marin, but I’m not allowed to talk about the discussion because of reporter/citizen confidentially agreements. However I can say her files on Rich are now indeed very deep and broad. See you Saturday!

  38. - Esquire - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 2:35 pm:

    So, we were sipping Zinfandel and watching “The Banger Sisters” and “Thelma and Louise” again, so after getting a little sloshed, a tattoo seemed to be a life affirming act to recapture our Sixties SDS type independence.

  39. - Apple - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 2:35 pm:

    Rep. Franks might have to actually run in a Democratic district for me be accept the caption’s premise…

  40. - Steve - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 2:59 pm:

    I would have thought her moral compass would have been placed on her tush.

  41. - poster - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 3:02 pm:

    Do you have a raffle license, per the Illinois Raffles Act, for your 50/50 raffle? Otherwise, you’re conducting illegal gambling.

  42. - Cincinnatus - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 3:50 pm:

    I understand Rich’s tramp stamp says “Bite Me”

  43. - Way Way Down Here - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 4:27 pm:

    Is it true she ordered AV equipment for Saturday?

  44. - Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 5:59 pm:

    “I get this tattoo, and I think I am all cool, and Mike, who I was with, gets a tattoo on his face! The Lesson; Never go to a tattoo parlor with your son and an Ex-Heavyweight Champ”

  45. - Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 6:04 pm:

    “So I get my tattoo, my son gets his … next was John Kass … his choice … a butterfly.”

  46. - Anonymous - Wednesday, Mar 28, 12 @ 11:43 pm:

    You should see where Dick Kay’s tattoo is.

Sorry, comments for this post are now closed.

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