Governor Quinn wears fake beer belly to smuggle in booze while Mike Frerichs stands alone somewhere in the distance holding a sign to ask voters to meet him.
Governor Quinn Polka! - Played by Judy Topinka and accompanied by her political opponent, soon-to-be-ex-Lt. Governor Sheila Simon
Here’s a silly ditty,
You can sing it right away
Now, here is what you say
So sing it while you may
Here’s a silly jingle,
You can sing it night or noon
Here’s the words, that’s all you need
‘Cause I just sang the tune:
Oh, I don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
I don’t want him, you can have him,
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat
He’s too fat
He’s too fat for me
(Take it away Sheila!)
I get dizzy
I get numbo
When I’m voting
For my Jum-Jum-Jumbo
I don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
I don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat
He’s too fat
He’s too fat for me
(Back to you, Judy!)
Can he lead us from our fate?
No, no, no, no, no
Can he lead our prairie state?
No, no, no, no, no
Does he govern with a feelin’?
Watchin’ the Mansion’s leaky ceilin’?
Is there a possibility
He will spring Blago and set him free?
No, no, no
We don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
And He’s too fat for me
But he just might have to be
We don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
Yeah, he’s too fat,
Much too fat
But he just might have to be
He’s so charming
And he’s so winning
But it’s alarming
When she goes in swimming
We don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
But he just might have to be
Compared to Rauner, whose a downer
But he just might have to be
But he’s too fat!
Did I really say that?
Compared to Rauner, we’ll see!
I have visited many places to eat here in Illinois, burger joints, serving beef fed with fine Illinois Corn, the best corn in the world. And taco stands, with corn shells, I only get the corn shells, made with fine Illinois corn, grown by farmers here in Illinois, good a true.
Don’t forget vegetarian options as well, like soy, grown in Illinois some near the Mississippi a fine river here in Illinois, soy raised by people who don’t take advantage of loopholes.
Also cheesecake, lots of fine Illinois cheescake made by Eli’s, a fine and true Illinois company.
“I’m not Bruce Rauner…that’s right, not him…not Bruce…not Bruce here….hello…hey there, not Bruce Rauner…not the guy on the banner…not Rauner…not Bruce, that’s right…not Bruce Rauner, thank you…”
- Upon Further Review - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:36 am:
Just like our President, I had no problem discriminating against LGBT people for decades of my political life until it was politically safe to support same-sex marriage. Thanks for being so fickle my fellow Democrats.
News Item: “6 persons were injured at the Pride Parade today when Governor Quinn’s shirt ripped, causing a cascading of blubber, which in turn caused a cascading number of walkers near him…..”
“The GOP has the Log Cabin Republicans, and I am proud to announce today that I have founded and will lead a rival group, the Mrs. Butterworth’s Democrats!”
Auditioning for the lead role in a remake of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s “Junior” Patrick Quinn will play the part of a male scientist who agrees to carry a pregnancy in his own body as part of a fertility research project.
I like big govs and I cannot lie
Scrawny Rauner makes me roll my eyes
When I see a pale state chief exec
All drippin down with sweat and big belly stain all wet
You get sprung, jammin your fridge with Coco Puffs
Cuz you notice Soy Boy is stuffed
My squeezy don’t want none
Unless the gov’s rockin muffuns
Three little words for the governors weight loss program. “buns of steel”. Give it a try and he even might make People Magazines most beautiful people issue.
I was out there too and it was bloody hot. Kudos for him walking down with 80 degree weather. Everyone was sweating bricks so that is probably why his shirt is wet.
Shame on you!
- OneMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:36 am:
Governor careful with a reference to being SoyBoy here…
- Sun - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:37 am:
Raise your hand if you’re sure!
- Confused - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:38 am:
At least he’s walking as opposed to riding in a convertible.
- wordslinger - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:39 am:
The arrow points to Illinois’ largest navel base.
- Ahoy! - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:41 am:
Man with a bible: Do you solemnly swear or affirm that you will tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
Pat Quinn: Maybe…
- Michelle Flaherty - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:42 am:
He’s the biggest innie at an outtie parade
- Grandson of Man - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:42 am:
“I want to be reelected governor because the food is so delicious.”
- Rich Miller - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:45 am:
Word and Flaherty waddle to an early lead!
- VanillaMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:45 am:
Vote for me, or I remove my shirt!
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:46 am:
“Hellloooo ‘Mr. Federal Subpoena Server’…”
- Black Ivy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:46 am:
Sometimes, nice guys do finish last cuz it’s just time.
- Neiled It - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:46 am:
Governor Quinn wears fake beer belly to smuggle in booze while Mike Frerichs stands alone somewhere in the distance holding a sign to ask voters to meet him.
- VanillaMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:47 am:
Governor Quinn’s new secret weapon - throughout parades, the governor’s polo sweats through the words, “Quinn/Vallas - 2014″
- VanillaMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:48 am:
Sweating with the Oldies
- Mister M - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:51 am:
Whoa1 That sunlight disinfectant is just blinding me!
- Hotel Ibiza - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:54 am:
Looks like a Southern Biscuit shy of 300 ilb.
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:55 am:
“Governor, the parade ended an hour ago, about ten blocks back.”
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:56 am:
“So what if the bikers endorsed Rauner. I’ve been endorsed by cops, construction workers, sailors, cowboys and very friendly Indian chiefs!”
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:56 am:
Key word : unfit. Unfit for: fill in the blank
- Brass - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 10:59 am:
Bloated Government
- Xray - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:01 am:
I finally dealt with the backlog of unpaid state bills. I ate ‘em!
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:01 am:
“It’s Quinn. Q-u-I-n-n. No E’s.”
- Anon. - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:02 am:
And right behind the Pride Parade comes Governor Pat Quinn leading the No Shame Parade.
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:08 am:
Harvey Milquetoast
- D.P.Gumby - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:11 am:
“Never let them see you sweat!”
- LizPhairTax - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:11 am:
I didn’t realize the Barilla boycott was still on
- Rob Roy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:13 am:
Which way to the closet door?
- Levi - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:14 am:
Hero.
- Jerome Horwitz - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:14 am:
The baby is due in November.
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:15 am:
“And now, Gov. Pat Quinn, presented by Super 8 Motels’ Free Breakfast!”
- Sunshine - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:16 am:
Wow, that was a great Slurpee!
- VanillaMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:17 am:
Governor Quinn Polka! - Played by Judy Topinka and accompanied by her political opponent, soon-to-be-ex-Lt. Governor Sheila Simon
Here’s a silly ditty,
You can sing it right away
Now, here is what you say
So sing it while you may
Here’s a silly jingle,
You can sing it night or noon
Here’s the words, that’s all you need
‘Cause I just sang the tune:
Oh, I don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
I don’t want him, you can have him,
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat
He’s too fat
He’s too fat for me
(Take it away Sheila!)
I get dizzy
I get numbo
When I’m voting
For my Jum-Jum-Jumbo
I don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
I don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat
He’s too fat
He’s too fat for me
(Back to you, Judy!)
Can he lead us from our fate?
No, no, no, no, no
Can he lead our prairie state?
No, no, no, no, no
Does he govern with a feelin’?
Watchin’ the Mansion’s leaky ceilin’?
Is there a possibility
He will spring Blago and set him free?
No, no, no
We don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
And He’s too fat for me
But he just might have to be
We don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
Yeah, he’s too fat,
Much too fat
But he just might have to be
He’s so charming
And he’s so winning
But it’s alarming
When she goes in swimming
We don’t want him, you can have him
He’s too fat for me
He’s too fat for me
But he just might have to be
Compared to Rauner, whose a downer
But he just might have to be
But he’s too fat!
Did I really say that?
Compared to Rauner, we’ll see!
HEY!
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:18 am:
@FakePatQuinn - thanks to staff for talking me out of the white t-shirt #NoOneWantsThat
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:19 am:
“Love is love in the Land of Lincoln, whether you love a person of the opposite sex, a person of the same sex, or just love lunch like I do…”
- Upon Further Review - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:20 am:
Quinn models the latest indelible stain upon his governorship.
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:20 am:
- VanillaMan - you are the song parody genius.
@FakePatQuinn - please vote, shirt tucked in or out?
- OneMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:23 am:
I have visited many places to eat here in Illinois, burger joints, serving beef fed with fine Illinois Corn, the best corn in the world. And taco stands, with corn shells, I only get the corn shells, made with fine Illinois corn, grown by farmers here in Illinois, good a true.
Don’t forget vegetarian options as well, like soy, grown in Illinois some near the Mississippi a fine river here in Illinois, soy raised by people who don’t take advantage of loopholes.
Also cheesecake, lots of fine Illinois cheescake made by Eli’s, a fine and true Illinois company.
And Nachos….
- VanillaMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:24 am:
OW - (together with feeling!)
HEY!
- OneMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:26 am:
Governor Quinn realized that was not the shirt for announcing new school lunch standards.
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:28 am:
“I knew I should have worn the purple tie. It’s so slimming.”
- Arizona Bob - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:29 am:
Waving to a sign in the crowd, “Chubby Chasers for Quinn!”
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:29 am:
“I’m not Bruce Rauner…that’s right, not him…not Bruce…not Bruce here….hello…hey there, not Bruce Rauner…not the guy on the banner…not Rauner…not Bruce, that’s right…not Bruce Rauner, thank you…”
- Upon Further Review - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:36 am:
Is that Boss Hogg from the “Dukes of Hazzard?”
- Union Man - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:36 am:
Is there money in the budget for XXXL shirts for political events?
- Doomed in Illinois - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:43 am:
They like me, they REALLY like me.
- OneMan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:46 am:
Our budget is under stain, just like this shirt….
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:46 am:
“I already celebrated this fine occasion today with a half-dozen Rainbow Cones!”
- PoolGuy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:46 am:
trying his hardest to not be the Chris Christie of the Midwest.
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:47 am:
“Wonder if I can get some violence prevention funds to stop the violence I am doing to this shirt?”
- Jeff Trigg - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:48 am:
Just like our President, I had no problem discriminating against LGBT people for decades of my political life until it was politically safe to support same-sex marriage. Thanks for being so fickle my fellow Democrats.
- Oswego Willy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:48 am:
- VanillaMan -, I am a poor copy to the original, but “Hey” to sing with ya!
“Caption?”
“Name’s Dewey Oxbereger, my friends call me ‘Ox’…”
- John A Logan - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:50 am:
Governor Quinn Marches toward the four winds.
- Anonymous - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:51 am:
News Item: “6 persons were injured at the Pride Parade today when Governor Quinn’s shirt ripped, causing a cascading of blubber, which in turn caused a cascading number of walkers near him…..”
- PublicServant - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 11:55 am:
This is a tough election, and it’s gutcheck time.
PQ: Gut? Check!
- phocion - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:02 pm:
Quinn: “My scheduler must have been confused. This doesn’t look like a bears parade to me.”
- Ahoy! - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:06 pm:
The dichotomy of being cold and sweating at the same time.
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:08 pm:
Still the biggest drag in the parade.
- Responsa - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:10 pm:
“Hey, I eat more when I’m stressed! Not saying that I have a thing to be stressed about, of course”
- Pot calling kettle - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:18 pm:
“Gay Pride? I thought it was the Gut Pride parade.”
- Amalia - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:18 pm:
Servant’s heart, State Fair belly.
- Pot calling kettle - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:20 pm:
Moments later, a man who some identified as Nick Cage ripped off the Governor’s shirt and ran off shouting something about a secret map.
- shore - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:21 pm:
I got 99 problems but getting fed ain’t one.
- Earnest - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:24 pm:
Governor Quinn locks up the Bear vote.
- Omay - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:25 pm:
Oh, baloney. I’ll have ham.
- Irish - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:26 pm:
“What? All my shirts have this stain.”
“I am wearing something you will never see on Bruce Rauner……SWEAT!!!!
- walker - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:28 pm:
Time to walk across the state again.
- Wensicia - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:35 pm:
It could be worse. At least he’s not wearing a wife beater t-shirt.
- anonymoose - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:42 pm:
“Pick me to be the grapes in your “Fruit of the Loom” ad.”
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:43 pm:
Flabulous.
- Ed - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:44 pm:
VM–great song!
- Gator - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:44 pm:
This sure is a long walk to the Taste of Chicago.
- 4 percent - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:45 pm:
With Dillard off the Rauner bandwagon, he now has time to don a Quinn mask and walk in parades!! Quinn can be in 2 places at once.
- Drake - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:47 pm:
I knew I should of had the veggie burger at Rau era’s 4th of July barbecue.
- Lapband - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:57 pm:
Tell Gov. Christie to bring it on.
- Cadillac - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 12:59 pm:
“Anybody got that Uber app handy?”
- West Side the Best Side - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:13 pm:
It’s the Pride parade and I’m proud of my gut.
- Steve - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:14 pm:
Pat Quinn: ‘I am Illinois and I’m quite proud of this picture of me, it shows the hard work Illinois represents.’
- Jechislo - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:18 pm:
Kinda gives the term “hottie” a whole new meaning.
- Keyser Soze - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:26 pm:
Which way to the gym?
- Southsider - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:33 pm:
Too many tator tots the Blue Frog…
- A guy... - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:37 pm:
Sporting evidence he had lunch at Chik Filet. Scandal!
- lake county democrat - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:41 pm:
Hey Farmio - did you know my favorite player of all time is John Kruk?
- The End Is Near - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:41 pm:
Except as annual parades may require, Governor Quinn’s fashion sense shall not be diminished or impaired.
- Ron Burgundy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:44 pm:
“The GOP has the Log Cabin Republicans, and I am proud to announce today that I have founded and will lead a rival group, the Mrs. Butterworth’s Democrats!”
- Tequila Mockingbird - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:48 pm:
The grape Kool Aid float appears in this years Gay Pride Parade.
- Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:49 pm:
Go with your gut, Pat.
- Woman on Fire - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 1:52 pm:
GET IN MY BELLY!
- 47th Ward - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 2:01 pm:
How many pro-gay marriage laws does a guy have to sign to get a bottle of cold water around here?
- The Colossus of Roads - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 2:05 pm:
Try as he may, Governor Quinn cannot get his sweat to resemble a lambda.
- Jimbo - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 2:25 pm:
Governor, you must have misheard me, it’s the PRIDE parade, not the Tide parade. You should have left the stained shirt at home.
- facts are stubborn things - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 2:41 pm:
Taxi….enough exercise.
- Dave Victor - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 2:50 pm:
Only rich people are thin.
- been there - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 3:06 pm:
A stain on the escutcheon of the State of Illinois. But would Rauner be an even bigger stain?
- wordslinger - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 3:09 pm:
Gov. Quinn shows his Pride — all the Tennessee Pride he had for breakfast. “It was a real sausage-fest,” the governor said.
- Rollo Tomasi - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 4:02 pm:
Auditioning for the lead role in a remake of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s “Junior” Patrick Quinn will play the part of a male scientist who agrees to carry a pregnancy in his own body as part of a fertility research project.
- Michelle Flaherty - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 4:32 pm:
I like big govs and I cannot lie
Scrawny Rauner makes me roll my eyes
When I see a pale state chief exec
All drippin down with sweat and big belly stain all wet
You get sprung, jammin your fridge with Coco Puffs
Cuz you notice Soy Boy is stuffed
My squeezy don’t want none
Unless the gov’s rockin muffuns
- Rich Miller - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 4:36 pm:
Flaherty wins. Period. End of story. I’ll be laughing all night at that one.
- sangamon gop - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 5:26 pm:
Nope…I’ve got nothing at all on the gaydar.
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 7:54 pm:
(kid by the curb) “Mom, look! It’s Barney!”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 7:56 pm:
“Hey, there’s Rauner. Hey, Beanpole! You and Princess Leia meet me for soy milk smoothies after the parade. You buy!”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 7:59 pm:
(To bodyguard) “Can you imagine that? Madigan just said if I had a pair of glasses on, I could pass for George Ryan. Da nerve!”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 8:00 pm:
“Nope, nope. I’m in swell shape, folks. It’s just that all this walking made my bulletproof vest slip down. Yeah, that’ the ticket.”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 8:03 pm:
“Yeah, well, when I ran the Coalition for Political Honesty, all I could afford was cheese samwiches. You’d put on a pound or two yourself.”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 8:04 pm:
“Gimme another bottle of water. I can still smell that pigeon doo on my shirt.”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 8:06 pm:
“Hey, I was shaking hands and somebody stole my $8 Walmart watch!”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 8:06 pm:
“Nah, I forgot to wear a cap so I have to hold my hand up to keep the sun out of my eyes for another half mile.”
- Streator Curmudgeon - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 8:08 pm:
“Hey, everybody, only a month ’til the State Fair and…corn dogs!!”
- Ginhouse Tommy - Wednesday, Jul 9, 14 @ 8:57 pm:
Three little words for the governors weight loss program. “buns of steel”. Give it a try and he even might make People Magazines most beautiful people issue.
- notty - Thursday, Jul 10, 14 @ 10:49 am:
I was out there too and it was bloody hot. Kudos for him walking down with 80 degree weather. Everyone was sweating bricks so that is probably why his shirt is wet.
Shame on you!