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Question of the day

Tuesday, Nov 25, 2014 - Posted by Rich Miller

* I usually do the question later in the day, but I’m running a bit behind this morning, so let’s do it now…

To celebrate Illinois Statehood Day on Wednesday, December 3, the Illinois State Society is hosting a reception and short program in the U.S. Capitol’s Visitor Center (1 First St., SE, Washington, D.C.). December 3 is the 196th anniversary of Illinois becoming the 21st state in the union in 1818.

The event from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. will be in room 201 A/B on the House side of the Visitor Center. It is open to the public and the media.

U.S. Senator Mark Kirk (R-IL), a former naval officer and honorary chairman of the event, will introduce a special guest, Commander Jess Porter of the U.S.S. Illinois (SSN 786), a new nuclear submarine now under construction. This is the first Navy vessel to be named after Illinois in 70 years.

Commander Porter will give details on the new Virginia-class submarine, expected to be delivered from the Electric Boat division of General Dynamics in Newport News, Virginia, in August 2016.

The U.S.S. Illinois is the third in the Block III of nuclear subs. It will feature a revised bow, and other advance technology from Ohio-class SSFNs. The first group of sailors reported for duty in June 2013. The contract to build her was awarded in December 2008.

* The Question: What other ways should Illinois celebrate its birthday? Snark heavily encouraged, of course.

       

62 Comments
  1. - Under Further Review - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 8:56 am:

    Publish a complete listing of every convicted politician. The collector’s edition of this volume ought to be the size of a telephone directory.


  2. - Give Me A Break - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 8:57 am:

    By creating an Offical State Canine and we all know who the only qualifed pup is.


  3. - Stones - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 8:58 am:

    Open a new exhibit in the Illinois State Museum. Hall of Shame of Convicted Illinois Governors


  4. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:01 am:

    A political “Connect the Dots” kids workbook, explaining how one thing leads to another to make a big picture appear.


  5. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:04 am:

    “Great Moments In Grave Rolling” - a montage of every time someone said “Lincoln is rolling over in his grave” to make a soundbite, not necessarily a point.


  6. - Under Further Review - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:05 am:

    A celebrity cookbook extolling the manifold holiday uses of the corn dog and the horse shoe sandwich!


  7. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:06 am:

    “History Through Bill Black’s Rants” - the last 20 years of Illinois history through the tirades of the ILGA’s favorite “story teller”


  8. - The Captain - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:08 am:

    We could rename the Cubs the Illinois Governors.


  9. - Stones - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:10 am:

    Chicago recognizes one of Illinois’ greatest engineering feats with an organized flushing on December 3. Peoria experiences extensive flooding two hours later.


  10. - bored now - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:11 am:

    mark kirk should give tammy duckworth a birthday cake for her daughter, and suggest that she name her newborn, “illinois.” he might also want to give her a card reminding tammy how time-consuming infants are, especially when they are in their “terrible twos” stage…


  11. - South of Sherman - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:11 am:

    A “Squeezy the Pension Python” pinata.


  12. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:13 am:

    “The Day Time Stood Still…And Other Cool Stories” - history of legislative shenanigans; from Lincoln jumping out a window, to US Cellular being voted on before midnight, depending on whose watch you were…watching.


  13. - skeptic - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:14 am:

    Party invitations that say “In lieu of gifts, send your donation to ‘The Illinois Pension Fund’.”


  14. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:17 am:

    “The Roland Burris Living Legacy” - Mr. Burris could give tours of the Mausoleum, what’s listed, the “what could have beens” and a question and answer puppet show explaining the US Senate appointment.


  15. - Anonymous - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:20 am:

    Charge every man woman and child $196 each to solve the pension and budget crisis, and then spend the money on something else.


  16. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:21 am:

    “Parchments & Napkins, Emails & Texts; The Notes That Changed Illinois” - an exhibit of correspondence from fibbing about the number of Illinois residents to make her a state, to legislation done on envelopes and napkins, to today, emails and texts, the most “private” of correspondence…


  17. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:27 am:

    “The State of Cook; An Interactive Exhibit” - A 13 piece Museum of Science and Industry exhibit where you press buttons on, “Taxes” and see what it’s like WITH Cook County, and then WITHOUT Cook County for downstate. Same with “Education”, “Prisons”, etc., and then end with “It’s A Small State After All”


  18. - Been There - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:31 am:

    They should hold a roast at an Italian banquet hall in Chicago. Have a bearded, scraggly looking fellow as the host. Have all the big shots from Illinois on the dias. All the who’s who will show up and pay big money. Then donate all the proceeds to Lutheran Social Services of Illinois.

    It’s worked before.


  19. - OneMan - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:34 am:

    Invade the Dells…


  20. - Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:36 am:

    Install video gaming in the Lincoln Presidential Museum.


  21. - AC - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:37 am:

    Annually pardon a previously convicted politician, after all, if the president can pardon a turkey at Thanksgiving, Illinois can pardon a turkey in December.


  22. - Mouthy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:46 am:

    Send every imprisoned Illinois politician a birthday cake with a file inside….one of those emery board types given out to voters with their names on them..


  23. - hisgirlfriday - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:49 am:

    Promise everyone who attends the Illinois State Society reception a pension. Make no plans to fund it.


  24. - Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:50 am:

    Carve the heads of Ernie Banks, Dick Van Dyke, Jack Benny, and Ernest Hemingway on Starved Rock.


  25. - Publius - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:54 am:

    Build a monument to the “Unknown Honest Politician”. There must be someone out there, we just have never seen him.


  26. - Mittuns - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:55 am:

    Illinois CEO-elect Bruce “Farmer Brucie” Rauner presents “An Evening of Hammer and Shakes” …featuring bringing things back, tool tossing, Carhart sewing classes, math problems with no solutions, political issues with no answers, and an all-you-can drink shake bar (Note: this is a cash-only bar).


  27. - Jocko - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:56 am:

    Change their name to the Illinois State Instructional Society. The acronym might increase their visibility.

    According to the DoD, the subs will run about 29 Billion apiece. Can’t we just apply that to our pension debt?


  28. - AC - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 9:59 am:

    Erect a statue of Paul Powell, standing on a shoebox, engraved with these words: “There’s only one thing worse than a defeated politician, and that’s a broke one.”


  29. - OneMan - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:00 am:

    Missed a decimal there Jocko…

    About 2.7 billion a copy…

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginia-class_submarine


  30. - Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:00 am:

    The Rod Blagojevich chia head!


  31. - Under Further Review - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:01 am:

    Some context from Wikipedia:

    J. Hamilton Lewis was known to be something of an eccentric in manner and dress, wearing spats well into the 1930s, and sporting Van Dyke whiskers and a “wavy pink toupee”, but he was courtly in manner, and a talented orator.

    He died in office, and his funeral service was held in the Senate Chamber. Lewis was buried in Abbey Mausoleum near Arlington National Cemetery. But it was demolished in 2001, and his remains were moved to an unknown location.


  32. - A guy... - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:03 am:

    Go through every cemetery in Cook County with a roll of stickers saying “I voted” and place them on every tombstone.


  33. - Past the Rule of 85 - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:04 am:

    Notify the Pentagon that we have WMD in the state that will be convening on December 2-4. Should be good for some federal aid.


  34. - Jocko - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:06 am:

    I was going from DoD’s estimate of 347 Billion over the lifetime of the 12 boats.

    https://defensenewsstand.com/NewsStand-General/The-INSIDER-Free-Article/dod-new-nuclear-subs-will-cost-347-billion-to-acquire-operate/menu-id-720.html


  35. - Louis G Atsaves - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:07 am:

    Bake a soy cake and light it up with 196 candles!


  36. - Belle - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:11 am:

    Enact an IL State law to commence Jan 31-2015 stating that rather than paying the Governor of IL a salary that we charge the Governor $500,000 per month in hopes of making a dent in the budget deficit. All funds will go directly to the pension deficit.
    Interesting fantasy?


  37. - Streator Curmudgeon - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:17 am:

    New tourism slogan on Welcome to Illinois signs:

    “America’s Favorite Sinkhole!”


  38. - Blago's Hare - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:19 am:

    I like the chia idea.


  39. - legal pad - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:19 am:

    Dec. 3rd is Capitol Fax Day! Day off mandated by law.


  40. - north shore cynic - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:22 am:

    Great news
    The USS Illinois will be able to look for the state pension system which is under water - great strategy.


  41. - Arizona Bob - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:27 am:

    Put this sign on every tollway and interstate entering Illinois, “Here lies the state of Illinois, domain of the Democratic Party. Look upon our works and despair….”


  42. - Sidewinder - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:32 am:

    Get a credit card and pay the pension and retiree healthcare debt.


  43. - Oswego Willy - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:33 am:

    - Arizona Bob -,

    How does it feel being a victim 24/7?

    Your whining must be a hit everywhere you go.

    To the Post,

    “Illinois Hug Day” - give your low level lackey a hug, if you find a wire, congratulate them for their service to the Federal Government, and wish them well. Then run.


  44. - MrJM - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:36 am:

    1. Borrow millions of dollars “for the children”.
    2. Use it to buy booze and lottery tickets.
    3. Shrug.

    – MrJM


  45. - Tommydanger - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:37 am:

    Sell the naming rights for the State of Illinois.

    I could live with saying I live in the State of Virgin or Jet Blue. The State of Allstate has a nice inclusive ring to it. Heck, I would be willing to live in the State of GoDaddy if it meant the money from the naming rights paid off our pension obligations.


  46. - Yellow Dog Democrat - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:42 am:

    Mayor Emanuel should have a press conference with Alderman Burke and the commander of the USS Chicago, the fourth navy vessel to bear the city’s name.

    The LA-Class nuclear submarine was launched 30 years ago.


  47. - 47th Ward - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:51 am:

    Illinois should invite its pals Wisconsin, Iowa, Indiana, Missouri and Kentucky to the greatest birthday place in the whole world…Chuck. E. Cheese.


  48. - Wensicia - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 10:52 am:

    Put up 196 rare bottles of wine for auction, proceeds for the state’s next contribution to the pension fund after the temporary income tax expires. (Wine donated by Bruce Rauner)


  49. - Siriusly - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 11:00 am:

    Using a raffle system - Illinois will award 196 state jobs in the new administration.

    If your name appeared in a court-used “clout list” document in any of the Fawell, Ryan, Sorich or Blagojevich trials you are automatically eligible.


  50. - Toure's Latte - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 11:08 am:

    Fitting that the USS Illinois is a boat that spends its time underwater.


  51. - Under Further Review - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 12:52 pm:

    @Arizona Bob:

    Nice quote from Keats. The poem is “Ozymandius,” but I have one friend who uses it to reference another emperor.


  52. - A modest proposal - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 1:13 pm:

    I realize this is all fun and games, but Illinois is a great state. I really wish we would have some pride in ourselves.

    How to celebrate? Let’s have a beer summit between squeezy and quinnoccio

    Ps. We don’t need Texas pride.


  53. - Siriusly - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 1:42 pm:

    Beer and squeezy in the same post. Nicely done modest!


  54. - Enviro - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 2:02 pm:

    Remember all of the things that make Illinois so very special such as:

    1: Millennium Park
    2: Navy Pier
    3: The Magnificent Mile
    4: Abraham Lincoln Presidential Library and Museum
    5: Shedd Aquarium
    6. The Art Institute of Chicago
    7. Starved Rock State Park
    8. Shawnee National Forest
    9. Brookfield Zoo
    10. Anderson Japanese Gardens
    12. Field Museum of Natural History
    13. Chicago Botanic Gardens
    14. Peoria Grand View Drive
    15. Lincoln Park Zoo


  55. - Arthur Andersen - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 2:06 pm:

    Find an old ship ready to sink, name it the ISS Quinnovich, and then allow the USS Abraham Lincoln, the USS Illinois, and a couple of Carrier Air Wings use it for target practice.


  56. - Cheryl44 - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 2:37 pm:

    Shelley wrote Ozymandias.


  57. - Under Further Review - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 3:16 pm:

    @Cheryl44:

    You are correct about the poet.


  58. - Arizona Bob - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 3:58 pm:

    Good job picking up the literary allusion, capitolfax campers!

    For those of you who aren’t engineers, the poem is about a sign at the entry of a once powerful and magnficent city whose ruler wanted visitors to “despair” that his accomplishments were so great. The city had become a wreck, reclaimed by the desert, so the “despair” expected from visitors was ironically transformed from intimidation from the rulers might to sorrow that this greatness had fallen apart, was decayed, and had been abandoned by its builders.

    Great analogy to what’s happening in Illinois, and something to think about on its birthday….


  59. - Demoralized - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 4:10 pm:

    @Arizona Bob

    Interesting play on words. I might have thought it a bit more funny if you had managed to keep it non-partisan. But, alas, that’s an impossible task for you. Illinois political history apparently isn’t one of your areas of expertise.

    If only the Democrats would just die an go away. Right Bob? All would be well with the world. Dope.


  60. - Formerly Known As... - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 5:08 pm:

    Hold a kick the can down the road contest.

    Find empty can.
    Kick as far as possible.
    Winner gets a nice IOU.
    Loser pays all of Illinois’ bills.


  61. - Enviro - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 5:51 pm:

    Ignore what Arizona Bob says and instead be proud that Chicago recently ranked:

    - Seventh on a list of top global cities

    - Top Metro in the US for corporate investment in a report released by Site Selection magazine

    - Among the World’s Most Competitive Cities in a report released by IBM in December 2013.

    http://www.worldbusinesschicago.com/news/chicago-named-top-global-city


  62. - Just the Way It Is One - Tuesday, Nov 25, 14 @ 5:57 pm:

    A Gov.-elect Rauner Carhartt Sweater Contest; a Pat Quinn Shades of Purple Tie Contest; A Squeezy the Python vs. Tom the Turkey Thanksgiving Memorial Mud-Wrestling Contest; a Mike Frierich’s Slam-Dunk Contest; and, finally, An “Oscar the Puppy” Best Darn Dog in Illinois Contest…!


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