In a press conference on Halloween guidelines, Mayor Lori Lightfoot and CDPH Commissioner Allison Arwady came dressed in costume as “Rona Destroyers”, handing out candy. pic.twitter.com/E0eVURg2r8
Lori’s press team: “I would highly recommend that you don’t dress up… OK, OK have it your way…. just please don’t call yourself the Rona destroyer. I really think you shouldn’t… OK, we are doing that too. Yay?!”
For Immediate Release
Contact: City Hall Press Office (312) 744-PRES
October 1, 2020
Costumed Crusaders Caution Candy Crunch
(Chicago IL) - In an precedented move in costumed advocacy, Mayor Lightfoot was a no-show at her press conference to discuss Halloween safety, and in her place a pandemic-fighting pair pushed for smart trick or treating, and gave specifics of how to celebrate Hallow’s Eve best.
The move, called the “Scuba Steve” presser, has only used only 2 other times, the 1979 “Land Shark Scare” that gripped the tri-state area of New York City, and the 1984 “Stay-Puft Marshmallow Mauling” where the Ghostbusters needed to calm New York so Lenny could save millions of registered voters.
After using fake voices and posing for pictures, the pair hurried off in what was a converted 1971 Jeep Wagoneer, with hand pump sanitizer styled lights, and painted like a Clorox Wipe canister on its side.
Look for these two to be in your neighborhood, all the while social distancing, wearing a mask, and sanitizing their hands after each trick or treat stop.
If you need them before Halloween for socially distance, preferably Zoom Call birthdays, anniversaries, weddings or family functions, leave your Zoom Call information with your Alderman at the Ward Office and the will appear via Zoom Bomb, no Zoom call too small.
- thisjustinagain - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 3:39 pm:
(As in Ghostbusters) “I ain’t ‘fraid of no ‘Rona.
- Michelle Flaherty - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 3:41 pm:
That pandemic special is some good stuff
- Skeptic - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 3:46 pm:
“Mom, can I have one with my Happy Meal?”
- Huh? - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 3:46 pm:
Do you want a squirt of hand sanitizer to go with that piece of candy?
- NIU Grad - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 3:55 pm:
They’ll need better outfits to hide from all of those FOIA requests.
- Montrose - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:01 pm:
“You can imagine how long it took us to get this many clorox wipes through procurement.”
- JoanP - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:06 pm:
“The size of the sign depends on the size of your campaign contribution.”
- JoanP - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:07 pm:
“No, you eat the CHOCOLATE!”
- Sayitaintso - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:13 pm:
Best piece of advice not heeded: “Maybe we should pass on this idea”.
- twowaystreet - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:22 pm:
Lori’s press team: “I would highly recommend that you don’t dress up… OK, OK have it your way…. just please don’t call yourself the Rona destroyer. I really think you shouldn’t… OK, we are doing that too. Yay?!”
- JoanP - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:35 pm:
All parents to Lori Lightfoot: “What do you mean, SIX DAYS of trick-or-treating? Are you nuts?”
- Bruce( no not him) - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:36 pm:
So are Clorox and Germ-X on board with Mayor’s costumes? Copyright much?
- Dance Band on the Titanic - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:40 pm:
They don’t quite look ready to challenge The Executioners for the WWE tag team title yet.
- @misterjayem - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:54 pm:
Don’t take candy from strangers, kids.
– MrJM
- Birds on the Bat - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 4:57 pm:
I hope the mayor is handing out bullet proof vests to the kids this year.
- DuPage Saint - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 5:21 pm:
Nothing like edibles to calm the masses
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 5:38 pm:
It’s like Lightfoot didn’t learn any lessons from Rauner.
Never. Wear. Costumes.
This is embarrassing. Worse than Rauner’s biker get up. Oof.
- frisbee - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 5:42 pm:
“One good thing about edibles, when it hits you, you feel no pain.”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:02 pm:
For Immediate Release
Contact: City Hall Press Office (312) 744-PRES
October 1, 2020
Costumed Crusaders Caution Candy Crunch
(Chicago IL) - In an precedented move in costumed advocacy, Mayor Lightfoot was a no-show at her press conference to discuss Halloween safety, and in her place a pandemic-fighting pair pushed for smart trick or treating, and gave specifics of how to celebrate Hallow’s Eve best.
The move, called the “Scuba Steve” presser, has only used only 2 other times, the 1979 “Land Shark Scare” that gripped the tri-state area of New York City, and the 1984 “Stay-Puft Marshmallow Mauling” where the Ghostbusters needed to calm New York so Lenny could save millions of registered voters.
After using fake voices and posing for pictures, the pair hurried off in what was a converted 1971 Jeep Wagoneer, with hand pump sanitizer styled lights, and painted like a Clorox Wipe canister on its side.
Look for these two to be in your neighborhood, all the while social distancing, wearing a mask, and sanitizing their hands after each trick or treat stop.
If you need them before Halloween for socially distance, preferably Zoom Call birthdays, anniversaries, weddings or family functions, leave your Zoom Call information with your Alderman at the Ward Office and the will appear via Zoom Bomb, no Zoom call too small.
###
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:06 pm:
When going Full Rauner goes even further that Full Rauner
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:06 pm:
This press conference was sponsored by
Ben’s Auto Sales
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:07 pm:
You never go full Rauner.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:10 pm:
===You never go full Rauner===
“No-no, see, we’re gonna go *beyond* full Rauner… “
- FOIA’d email chain to this presser
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:12 pm:
If this superhero becomes Lightfoot’s Tony Clifton, that might be too much, even for 2020
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:15 pm:
Maybe it would help if Lightfoot wore the blue cape, Dr. Arwady wore the red cape?
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 6:25 pm:
Overheard;
“Even the Great Pumpkin is wearing a mask…”
- Amalia - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 7:56 pm:
thanks for some levity, we need it.
- drethixnagaraj - Thursday, Oct 1, 20 @ 8:39 pm:
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