“Hopefully your advance staff will have identified ‘journalists’ connected to / formerly affiliated with the Illinois Policy Institute / John Tillman.”
“So I was wondering if you’d get the administration to buy the Thompson Center from us, you guys demolish it, then sell the land back to us for a $1, and we sell the vacant lot. Just think about it… “
“Mr. President, you’re so kind, thank you. I do ‘kind of’ have fundraisers, they’re quite successful, but they usually begin and end with an electronic funds transfer and I head off to bed.”
So they put the beef in the sandwich, then the dip the whole thing in au jus, pile on some giardiniera and call it a day. You’ll love it, I have 5 of ‘em a day.
Whatever you do, don’t put ketchup on your dog at Portillos, you’ll never hear the end of it. Remember - Mustard, Chopped Onions, Sweet Relish, Pickle Spear, Tomato Slices, Sport Peppers, and Celery Salt.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 2:54 pm:
“Please, don’t make me stand next to Lori Lightfoot”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 2:55 pm:
“So I move into the Governor’s mansion, it’s full of costumes.”
- Anon E Moose - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 2:55 pm:
“Just a small loan…like $2.9 billion.”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 2:56 pm:
“No. You misunderstood. I don’t want your job today… when your done with your term… or second term… “
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 2:58 pm:
“I’ll get you gallons of ice cream, Mr. President, just not Oberweis Ice Cream”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:01 pm:
“My predecessor is in Florida now too, so I can relate”
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:02 pm:
So listen, now that you’re sending Rahm to Japan, do you think we can nominate Lori for say, oh, I don’t know, maybe ambassador to Outer Mongolia?
- very old soil - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:04 pm:
Now, a priest and a rabbi ….
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:04 pm:
“Right now I watching all the Marvel movies in sequential order, not release order… “
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:05 pm:
“Mike Madigan? Won’t see him no more”
- EssentialStateEmployeeFromChatham - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:05 pm:
“Trust me, you’ll love Chicago-style pizza.”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:06 pm:
“Now, Amy Jacobson may want to ask you a question… don’t call on her. Trust me. It’ll get weird”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:08 pm:
“You tell Durbin thanks for the mess he made of the state party here. Hope it’s been worth it”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:10 pm:
“Crystal Lake is great, no doubt, but have you ever been to Oswego…”
- Anyone Remember - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:11 pm:
“Hopefully your advance staff will have identified ‘journalists’ connected to / formerly affiliated with the Illinois Policy Institute / John Tillman.”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:13 pm:
“So I was wondering if you’d get the administration to buy the Thompson Center from us, you guys demolish it, then sell the land back to us for a $1, and we sell the vacant lot. Just think about it… “
- Wizard of Oz - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:16 pm:
Scott Gryder isn’t really the future of the GOP.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:17 pm:
“You heard right, they want a 51st state. They’re just grifters, but for them, grifting pays the bills”
- Colin O'Scopy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:18 pm:
“Well Stanley, this is another fine mess you’ve gotten us into.”
- Cannon649 - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:20 pm:
What do you mean I am this fifth ranking billionaire in the party?
- Lucky Pierre - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:20 pm:
You wouldn’t believe it but you could save a bundle if you just remove a few toilets
- Welles Wilder - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:22 pm:
How’s Danny Solis doing?
- Ducky LaMoore - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:24 pm:
Governor Pritzker welcomes America’s second orange President to Illinois.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:27 pm:
“I’d trust Mitch McConnell before I’d trust Joe Manchin, but that’s me, I have my own legislative nightmares”
- The Captain - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:28 pm:
“Look, it’s just outlived its functional usefulness as an office building, but it would make a magnificent indoor waterpark.”
- thisjustinagain - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:29 pm:
“….Have you heard the good news about our finances?; we’re only eleventy billion behind on pension payments now…”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:29 pm:
“You do you, but this ketchup on a hot dog thing is a real boondoggle, so I’d stick with ice cream, don’t grab a hot dog”
- Suburbanon - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:46 pm:
Where should I look for a beach home on Delaware Bay?
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:50 pm:
“When you’ve gone back to Scranton, have you ever toured the Dunder Mifflin Paper Company?”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:52 pm:
“That ‘Friends’ reunion, amirite? David Schwimmer went to Northwestern, right here in Illinois.., “
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:56 pm:
“All due respect, I know what I said. ‘Put Rahm on a slow boat to China’… “
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 3:58 pm:
“Sure, we are the ‘Land of Lincoln’ but there are no real Lincoln sites around Crystal Lake, I asked around”
- Pizza Man - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:05 pm:
“Mr. President…remember Bob Barker? Just sayin’….anyway thanks for visiting our state!”
- EssentialStateEmployeeFromChatham - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:10 pm:
==“Crystal Lake is great, no doubt, but have you ever been to Oswego…”==
“Would you like to go to Oswego and play some rounds of golf with Tom Cross and Willy?”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:18 pm:
=== “Would you like to go to Oswego and play some rounds of golf with Tom Cross and Willy?===
I’m more likely to play golf with the president or the governor… than with Cross it seems.
They all know where to find me.
“Caption?”
“It’s true, the Bears started in Decatur, Mr. President, but that was some time ago. Arlington Heights is a whole different matter… “
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:24 pm:
“Gotta say, it’s nice not having to check tweets every day, Mr. President”
- Occasional Quipper - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:26 pm:
OW is on a major roll today…thanks for the chuckles!
- EssentialStateEmployeeFromChatham - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:27 pm:
==“It’s true, the Bears started in Decatur, Mr. President, but that was some time ago.==
“That was back when they had ownership that truly cared about winning”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:28 pm:
“Mr. President, maybe you can help me. ‘The Masked Singer’. What is that show all about?”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:36 pm:
(Tips cap to - Occasional Quipper -)
“Mr. President, you’re so kind, thank you. I do ‘kind of’ have fundraisers, they’re quite successful, but they usually begin and end with an electronic funds transfer and I head off to bed.”
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 4:44 pm:
“Oh Mr. President, deep dish pizza is for the tourists, let me get you some tavern cut… “
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 5:07 pm:
“I’m quite serious, Mr. President, is there a contingency plan for zombies? I’d like to know if there’s at least a thought to them… “
- Amalia - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 5:21 pm:
Can I be like Springsteen, Olympic daughter?
- Bruce( no not him) - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 5:27 pm:
“So joe, can I call you Joe?”
Oh… OK Mr President
- product of the '60's - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 5:39 pm:
There’s some guy on a political blog that keeps saying Governor’s own…..anyway you could get sign an Executive Order that exempts Illinois from that?
- Siwash - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 6:17 pm:
Laurel and Hardy.
Jokesters Supreme.
- Give Us Barabbas - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 6:39 pm:
“Can you lend me Miz Psaki for a little bit? Just for one little press conference…”
- EssentialStateEmployeeFromChatham - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 7:09 pm:
“Man oh man, do the Cubs really suck.”
- Anonymous - Thursday, Jul 8, 21 @ 9:47 pm:
I know you gave us $8 billion but I could use a few more dollars.
- JolietJake - Friday, Jul 9, 21 @ 7:34 am:
So they put the beef in the sandwich, then the dip the whole thing in au jus, pile on some giardiniera and call it a day. You’ll love it, I have 5 of ‘em a day.
- JolietJake - Friday, Jul 9, 21 @ 7:38 am:
Whatever you do, don’t put ketchup on your dog at Portillos, you’ll never hear the end of it. Remember - Mustard, Chopped Onions, Sweet Relish, Pickle Spear, Tomato Slices, Sport Peppers, and Celery Salt.