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Caption contest!

Monday, May 12, 2014

* From a commenter…

- Posted by Rich Miller        


74 Comments
  1. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:47 am:

    Elwood P. Dowd had “Harvey”…I get Two-Putt’s Elephant.


  2. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:48 am:

    “Sure, he’s bulky, slow, some say stiff, but one heck of a Caddy!”


  3. - Anonymous - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:48 am:

    I think the elephant needs a martini glass


  4. - AFSCME Steward - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:49 am:

    The ILGOP, too lazy to even present an alternative plan, now refuses to walk anywhere.


  5. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:49 am:

    “Two-Putt’s” mini-golf doesn’t have a windmill hole…”


  6. - AFSCME Steward - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:49 am:

    The trailor Bruce Rauner used when he hijacked the ILGOP.


  7. - Walker - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:49 am:

    “Forget me not.”


  8. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:50 am:

    “We found something that works harder to elect Tom Cross than Tom…”


  9. - Tom Joad - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:51 am:

    That looks like the same elephant the Republicans have been using in parades for the last 30 years in that area.


  10. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:51 am:

    “It’s a temporary tattoo; the original had ‘’Speaker’ , than ‘Attorney General’, now Treasurer…”


  11. - Ron Burgundy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:52 am:

    Hit the golf ball in its rear and it comes out the trunk!


  12. - Arthur Andersen - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:55 am:

    “I can’t wait to hitch my campaign mascot to Oswego Willy’s car some day when he is out golfing at Fox Bend!”


  13. - Stones - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 9:58 am:

    Where the heck do they store that thing?


  14. - zatoichi - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:00 am:

    The figure for Hole #3 at the Tom Cross Putt-Putt Classic course arrives. The Swinging post at #15, the Windmill at #12, and the Haunted House at #7 remain favorites. Open daily 10-10, through October 15.


  15. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:03 am:

    - AA -, that is my fear! Good stuff.

    “Caption?”

    “It’s too big to fit through the gates of Medinah, so “Two-Putt” left it on Medinah Road on Primary Day, hoping no one would notice…”


  16. - Dave Dahl - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:03 am:

    “What, and give up show business?”


  17. - Arthur Andersen - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:04 am:

    “Thanks for the compliment! I had been looking for something a little smaller and not as stiff as my opponent.”


  18. - PublicServant - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:04 am:

    Replace the snout with a golf club, and it’s a winner.


  19. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:05 am:

    “When Cross makes a birdie, it squirts water…”


  20. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:08 am:

    The only difference between the stuffed elephant in a parade and Tom Cross walking in a parade is that the stuffed elephant, it can’t hit a fade 5-iron, in a draw wind, to a back right pin over a trap.

    Otherwise…same.


  21. - Spliff - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:09 am:

    Tom Cross unveils his choice for deputy treasurer.


  22. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:14 am:

    “Rumor has it that Willy is here to finally talk to Tom. But, where is he? Where can he be? We checked with the organizers, other campaigns marching today, we even checked Fox Bend? Where is he!?!?”

    (Elephant sneezes)

    “Bless you”

    ‘Elephant’ - (muffled) “thanks”

    “Now I want this Dopey guy Willy found, do whatever you need to do…”


  23. - Cabildero - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:20 am:

    Hey, where’s my martini? And who painted me grey?


  24. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:20 am:

    Bruce Rauner’s Harley has the lighter load here. Bruce carrying Tom, that needs hydraulics.


  25. - too obvious - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:21 am:

    Tom Cross furious that fake elephant could not be poached for its ivory.


  26. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:22 am:

    “It came with a note; ‘Good luck with your new career path. All the best, Jimmy Durkin and the HGOP…”


  27. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:25 am:

    The Cross Crew got the Elephant out of moth balls when Mike Frerichs started bringing a 12 foot lumberjack that looks like Frerichs to parades.


  28. - Bluefish - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:25 am:

    “Hey Tom…the Trojan elephant you’re sending to the Frerichs campaign might work better if it didn’t have your name on its side.”


  29. - Republicrat - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:26 am:

    Does Mr. Cross arrive at the event the same way as Ace Ventura/Jim Carrey did in that hilarious scene with the Rhino in “When Nature Calls?”


  30. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:31 am:

    The ‘Tom Cross, GOTV Secret Weapon’

    Old, Gray, Stiff, Lazy, Silent, Stationary, Hollow, and less than Genuine.


  31. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:32 am:

    It was suppose to say “Rauner for Governor”, but even a fake GOP Elephant got a rash…


  32. - Shark Sandwich - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:32 am:

    “Ok, bad news first - Bradley Tusk is unavailable to work your campaign. The good news is, we got the NEXT BEST THING!!”


  33. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:35 am:

    @FakeMikeFrerichs - I had an Elephant first; supported it, voted for it, and now Republican Tom Cross wants to claim that Elephant for the GOP? Check the records #FrerichsGlomsOnTheRealAndTheDopey


  34. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:38 am:

    “That is one souped-up golf cart to pull that trailer with the Elephant, Tom…”


  35. - anonymoose - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:41 am:

    As a Republican best suited for ancient times….I think I’d prefer either a woolly mammoth - or the pink elephant with an olive in the full martooki glass, please.


  36. - Wensicia - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:42 am:

    “Bruce gave this to me, says he doesn’t need it anymore.”


  37. - Arthur Andersen - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:46 am:

    “Hey, Bruce, we need you over here right now. Ev wants to ride on top of Cross’s float in the parade…..No, I usually wouldn’t sir, but it’s not a regular float…it’s a big plastic elephant with “Join Tom Cross” painted on the sides….Ok then we’ll just send someone up there with her to make sure she doesn’t slip off. Thank you. “


  38. - Union Man - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:47 am:

    The elephant is in the house!!


  39. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:48 am:

    @FakeMikeFrerichs - I am introducing legislation to prohibit the exploitation of fake pachyderms in parade type displays. I am standing tall against phony elephants! #TakeThatTomCross #NotFlipFloppingMyRecord


  40. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:51 am:

    @FakeMikeFrerichs - yeah, I guess I was a sponsor of paper mâché Elephants promoting things, especially in parades. It took about 45 seconds to find it. Please don’t search my record, here is a picture if the Elephant #BeggingForMercy #NotLyingJustIgnorantOfMyself


  41. - John Countryman - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:51 am:

    That was my elephant when I was running for office. Her name is Ellie. Good to know she is still working.


  42. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:55 am:

    “You give that Cross Crew some gray paint, a flat bed, chicken wire and paper mâché, you get something special. No, not the Elephant, I’m talking Tom Cross…”


  43. - train111 - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 10:59 am:

    My chip shot is so bad, I couldn’t hit that thing even on a good day!


  44. - 47th Ward - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:04 am:

    Tom Cross. Republican. Trailing.


  45. - 47th Ward - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:06 am:

    Tired of all of the tales of his involvement in the Blagojevich budget schemes, Tom Cross finally got rid of the elephant in the room.


  46. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:11 am:

    “She’s here? We have a ‘Code Seven’ Plummer … I thought we sent her to ‘Lincoln County…no, don’t have her say anything!…Don’t let her walk near Bruce…or anyone… Tell her…that the hollow elephant would be a good place for her, like a ‘Surprise’ thing… then tell her she can ‘pop out’ or something…and for goodness sake, have her sign the waivers…”


  47. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:23 am:

    “Mr. Rauner, the ‘Elephant’ is…flattered…you wanted a picture, but it said it saw your picture with Rahm, the hugging one, and the fake Elephant would rather not pose with you… I could ask, but it already said a fake ‘no’, so…”


  48. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:25 am:

    “Show me your ‘Parade’ Face! That’s not your ‘Parade’ face, now show us your ‘real’ ‘Parade’ face! Not bad Ellie, work on it!”


  49. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:27 am:

    “My husband and I support Tom, don’t get me wrong, but I refused to let my kids eat the Candy from where that Elephant is …dispensing!”


  50. - VanillaMan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:35 am:

    If this was a real elephant, it would be morbidly embarrassed.


  51. - VanillaMan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:36 am:

    When you aren’t looking for something new and fresh in politics, you get the old and embarrassing.


  52. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:37 am:

    A very telling symbol of “Leader” Cross;

    The HGOP is also “moving on”, but they, like an Elephant, won’t forget.


  53. - AFSCME Steward - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:38 am:

    The ILGOP: The elephant in the room.


  54. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:41 am:

    “So, Tom, we heard this Elephant was made of Walk Sheets your Crew never used to vote ‘Pluses’…”


  55. - VanillaMan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:42 am:

    If it remained pink, it would make a lot more sense to voters tired of bloated and hollow political crap like this.


  56. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:52 am:

    Who said the Tom Cross is afraid to move the ILGOP platform. You get 4 wheels and a hitch, it’s mobile!


  57. - VanillaMan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:52 am:

    I bet it looked impressive when lit during torch light parades, back in 1906.


  58. - A guy... - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:56 am:

    Just like Sturgis, it’s only the sissies that use the trailor.


  59. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 11:57 am:

    “We had the elephant stored in a garage downstate. It’s golf season, so once Tom took out all his golf stuff at the campaign office, there was plenty of room up north to park the float…”


  60. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:03 pm:

    “After her ‘accident’ at the Tom Cross Golf Outing and Pig Roast, ‘Slip and Sue’ Sanguinetti shows off her ’settlement’ in a ‘Parade of Shame’ also ordered by the agreement.”


  61. - VanillaMan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:04 pm:

    It was either this, or the old men driving Jeepsters in Chief Illiniwek costumes throwing cigarettes out to the crowd.


  62. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:04 pm:

    “No Jason, it’s not for rides, it’s for walking with in parades…”


  63. - VanillaMan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:06 pm:

    By the time it appeared at the parade, the crowd left.


  64. - VanillaMan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:07 pm:

    Guess who just turned 80 years old today?


  65. - x ace - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:29 pm:

    ” One morning I shot an Elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas , I’ll Never Know.”

    Groucho


  66. - ah HA - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:34 pm:

    “The Elephant’s in the room”


  67. - dupage dan - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 12:43 pm:

    Look, Mr Frodo, it’s an oliphant!!! I always wanted to see one!


  68. - A guy... - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 2:47 pm:

    “20 Campaign workers were hospitalized from heat exhaustion and dehydration when their ‘Trojan Elephant’ couldn’t be wheeled into any headquarters that would matter” Instead it stood in the middle of the road where one person with a phone took a picture of it.


  69. - Walker - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 3:30 pm:

    A winner: Vanilla Man at 12:04

    Trifecta in images.


  70. - Arthur Andersen - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 4:17 pm:

    “No, Mr. Cross, the ‘Shake Up Express’ is not equipped for towing. Thanks for calling and Vote Rauner!”


  71. - Oswego Willy - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 4:20 pm:

    - AA -, I borrowed from you a bit, so a hat tip by me is warranted.

    “Caption?”

    CROSS FLOATS HIS VISION, PROMISES NOT TO BE DRAG.


  72. - Rhino Slider - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 4:28 pm:

    “I am not a career politician, but I own one of these.”


  73. - Arthur Andersen - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 6:25 pm:

    OW, we all “inspire” one another around here to be sure.

    “Former GOP National Committeeman Kjellander marches in parade in support of Treasurer Hopeful”


  74. - Just The Way It Is One - Monday, May 12, 14 @ 7:49 pm:

    “Vote for Cross or I’ll either gore, or, step all OVER ya!!!”


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