Like a scene at the end of a war/apocalypse movie, reaching the top of a cliff, seeing the sum rising over a distant horizon, with only one short, dangerous, mine field to cross to get to the end. Figuratively speaking, of course. Well, maybe.
It’s going (Rauner) to be hard (Quinn) to (Rauner) watch (Quinn) television (Rauner) without (Rauner Rauner) (Quinn) getting (Rauner) upset (Quinn) about (Rauner Quinn Rauner) the (Quinn) election.
- Lord Stanley's Cup - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:04 pm:
John Kass will dress up in William Wallace war paint, rent a horse, and do the Braveheart motivational speech in front of the Tribune Tower.
We’ll all be attending the Rauner pre-election “Get Out the Vote” party. Instead of paying to get in, Rauner will offer every participant $1,000 if they’ll vote for him. Multiple locations will include Soldier Field, Wrigley Field and U.S. Cellular Field.
Reporters across the state engaged in furious backpedaling, pretending they knew all along that a greedy vulture capitalist can’t be elected governor in Illinois.
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:45 pm:
Wensicia & Precinct Captain: I will hybridize your comments:
Bruce Rauner will have planes flying over the state dropping leaflets that promise $1000 cash to all who attend his victory party. If he has a victory party, hint, hint, who do you plan to vote for now…
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:48 pm:
Alternative: The state will be empty of Democrats. How will this happen? Rauner will use his voter database to mail every double D a voucher for an all-inclusive trip to a tropical resort. Trip dates: Nov 2- Nov 6
Well that’ll be the day
When we say “now try”
That’ll be the day
The TV makes you cry
You say you won’t cast a vote
But you know it’s a lie
The hunt will be on for a fall guy
They started with the shoving
Said they’re better at gov’ning
Gave us their hugs and kisses
Spent their money too
Told us we were their babies
Claimed the other had rabies
On that day, someone’s gonna sue
Well that’ll be the day
The demons won’t sleep
That’ll be the day
The angels will weep
We’ll hear a fairy tale
We’ll know it’s a lie
Cause that’ll be the day our sanity waves bye-bye
Bruce Rauner claims he’s smart
Pat Quinn claims he’s all heart
But no matter who wins, we’ll be blue
They kiss and tell us sweetly
On TV, YouTube - even tweet me
That their lies are really true
Well that’ll be the day
Staffer work til they die
That’ll be the day
When you want to cry
Cuz you know that within a day
You know it’s no lie
That’ll be the day our state will die
“Fire and brimstone coming down from the sky! Rivers and seas boiling! Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes! The dead rising from the grave! Human sacrifice! Dogs and cats, living together! Mass hysteria!”
Beer distributors will be frantically calling Rauner headquarters to attempt last ditch efforts to win the bid to run the cash bars at Rauner’s victory party.
Quinn’s closing ad: (scene from original Batman) “Hubba, Hubba, Hubba…money, money, money…who do you trust? Me (Bruce Rauner), I’m giving away free money.”
Paid by Quinn for Illinois
(if he gets permission first…oh wait)
- Commonsense in Illinois - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 3:07 pm:
A stark, muddy, pock-marked landscape…a column of smoke rising on the horizon…and cockroaches, man, cockroaches everywhere!
folks will be going tv free cuz their sick of the ads…Quinn will be purple in the face from exhaustion, the Baron keeps asking himself why he did it, lowest voter interest/turnout EVER…
To paraphrase the anti-war movement…”What if they had an election and no one voted?”
By Nov 3, my head will just about explode at how much money was spent on this election. Imagine how many potholes could be filled, or mouths fed, or sports stadiums built, or mental health facilities operated, or books bought or … for all the money spent on the election. (Yet, suggest raising taxes by an equal amount and everyone goes ballistic.) Anyway, I’m with SoccerMom…wall-to-wall ads on TV, wall-to-wall signs on the roads. All for those two or three undecideds that are left. Man, I need a vacation, my Cynic-O-Meter(tm) just hit 11.
- Bring Back Boone's - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 12:57 pm:
Like the bleachers in Wrigley Field at the end of another losing season.
- Ducky LaMoore - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 12:57 pm:
I’ll give you a winter prediction: It’s gonna be cold, it’s gonna be grey, and it’s gonna last you for the rest of your life….
- Anonymous - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:00 pm:
Like a scene at the end of a war/apocalypse movie, reaching the top of a cliff, seeing the sum rising over a distant horizon, with only one short, dangerous, mine field to cross to get to the end. Figuratively speaking, of course. Well, maybe.
- Soccermom - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:03 pm:
It’s going (Rauner) to be hard (Quinn) to (Rauner) watch (Quinn) television (Rauner) without (Rauner Rauner) (Quinn) getting (Rauner) upset (Quinn) about (Rauner Quinn Rauner) the (Quinn) election.
- Lord Stanley's Cup - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:04 pm:
John Kass will dress up in William Wallace war paint, rent a horse, and do the Braveheart motivational speech in front of the Tribune Tower.
- the Patriot - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:04 pm:
Like the Parade scene from Animal House, Over, nothing is over until we say it is!
- Spliff - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:05 pm:
We will be beset by a plague of locusts … all with tiny Bruce Rauner bumper stickers on their wings.
- Norseman - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:09 pm:
A lousy day for TV - all politcal ads.
- Norseman - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:10 pm:
SoccerMom, you beat me to the enter button.
- Dirty Red - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:17 pm:
The networks will have adjusted their fall lineups and begin to promo the replacements, which will consist of nothing but negative ads.
- Dirty Red - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:17 pm:
The networks will have adjusted their fall lineups and begun to promo the replacements, which will consist of nothing but negative ads.
- Wensicia - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:19 pm:
We’ll all be attending the Rauner pre-election “Get Out the Vote” party. Instead of paying to get in, Rauner will offer every participant $1,000 if they’ll vote for him. Multiple locations will include Soldier Field, Wrigley Field and U.S. Cellular Field.
- Empty Suit - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:23 pm:
13 million people holding their breath waiting to exhale.
- North Shore Joe - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:23 pm:
Two words…
Gong. Show.
- OneMan - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:24 pm:
A shirtless (but not tieless) Pat Quinn running the streets shouting in a horse voice
Billionare Bruce Rauner…
- Big Muddy - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:30 pm:
Grey, cold and dreary. The weather however will be 75 and sunny.
- Rhino Slider - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:33 pm:
A lot of SEIU and AFSCME ants swarming the black communities with a massive door knocking campaign.
- Precinct Captain - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:36 pm:
Bruce leafleting from Ken Griffin’s luxury private jet.
- too obvious - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:40 pm:
Reporters across the state engaged in furious backpedaling, pretending they knew all along that a greedy vulture capitalist can’t be elected governor in Illinois.
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:45 pm:
Wensicia & Precinct Captain: I will hybridize your comments:
Bruce Rauner will have planes flying over the state dropping leaflets that promise $1000 cash to all who attend his victory party. If he has a victory party, hint, hint, who do you plan to vote for now…
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:48 pm:
Alternative: The state will be empty of Democrats. How will this happen? Rauner will use his voter database to mail every double D a voucher for an all-inclusive trip to a tropical resort. Trip dates: Nov 2- Nov 6
- Rufus - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:49 pm:
Six feet of Snow!
- In_The_Middle - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:50 pm:
About what it looks like right now- a big swirl going down the drain.
- Joan P. - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:50 pm:
Oh, god, it’s going to be an ocean of signs. We’ll be inundated. And the sad thing is they’ll all still be up on December 3!
I will staying as far from my television, radio and phone as possible.
- walker - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:53 pm:
Teams of lawyers prepping for recounts and absentee ballot reviews.
- VanillaMan - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:55 pm:
Well that’ll be the day
When we say “now try”
That’ll be the day
The TV makes you cry
You say you won’t cast a vote
But you know it’s a lie
The hunt will be on for a fall guy
They started with the shoving
Said they’re better at gov’ning
Gave us their hugs and kisses
Spent their money too
Told us we were their babies
Claimed the other had rabies
On that day, someone’s gonna sue
Well that’ll be the day
The demons won’t sleep
That’ll be the day
The angels will weep
We’ll hear a fairy tale
We’ll know it’s a lie
Cause that’ll be the day our sanity waves bye-bye
Bruce Rauner claims he’s smart
Pat Quinn claims he’s all heart
But no matter who wins, we’ll be blue
They kiss and tell us sweetly
On TV, YouTube - even tweet me
That their lies are really true
Well that’ll be the day
Staffer work til they die
That’ll be the day
When you want to cry
Cuz you know that within a day
You know it’s no lie
That’ll be the day our state will die
- RNUG - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:00 pm:
- Norseman - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 1:09 pm said “A lousy day for TV - all politcal ads.”
Close, but I predict that Rauner will buy every bit of air time, radio, TV and cable, and preempt all regular broadcasts … to run non-stop ads.
- walker - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:10 pm:
VMan: Excellent.
Though the last line is a bit much.
“That’ll be the day when we refuse to die.”
- Amalia - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:12 pm:
“Fire and brimstone coming down from the sky! Rivers and seas boiling! Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes! The dead rising from the grave! Human sacrifice! Dogs and cats, living together! Mass hysteria!”
or just me eating lots of chocolate.
- Anonymoiis - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:13 pm:
Beer distributors will be frantically calling Rauner headquarters to attempt last ditch efforts to win the bid to run the cash bars at Rauner’s victory party.
- steve schnorf - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:19 pm:
Gray, cloudy, chilly except for the southern third of the state
- DuPage - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:23 pm:
Constant political ads/lies.
- Archiesmom - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:25 pm:
I’m with my fellow Mom. I’m already reflexively muting the TV when that fricking “Headlines” ad comes on.
- Archiesmom - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:26 pm:
And my answering machine will be packed with robocalls.
- Six Degrees of Separation - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:27 pm:
The Bears have a bye week, so at least my game will not be interrupted by educational clips on the Two Worst White Men Alive.
- Arthur Andersen - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:33 pm:
Wall to wall Netflix at Chez AA that evening!
- Knome Sane - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:34 pm:
Scorched earth.
- Snucka - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:36 pm:
The race could be decided by November 3, if one or the other candidate can capitalize on the Early Voting phase of the campaign.
- Anonymoiis - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:39 pm:
==- Snucka - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:36 pm:
The race could be decided by November 3, if one or the other candidate can capitalize on the Early Voting phase of the campaign.==
With same day registration now allowed, the race won’t be over until 7pm on election day
- wordslinger - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:49 pm:
Fear and loathing.
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:50 pm:
The day before?
Crazy!
Same day registration is going to put a premium of the Crew that can identify their very late pluses to literally bus them to their polling places.
If it were me, the day before?
Have about 5-6 shuttle buses and strategize the usage to coincide with 9am and 3pm call times.
It could very well come down to who can run the 110 yard dash, but the race is only 100 yards.
It could feel like the day before a ground assault, and the Crew that wants that responsibility will win.
That will be the day before.
- A guy... - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 2:59 pm:
Smelt season at the Port of Milwaukee.
(hope this one survives)
- unclesam - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 3:07 pm:
Quinn’s closing ad: (scene from original Batman) “Hubba, Hubba, Hubba…money, money, money…who do you trust? Me (Bruce Rauner), I’m giving away free money.”
Paid by Quinn for Illinois
(if he gets permission first…oh wait)
- Commonsense in Illinois - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 3:07 pm:
A stark, muddy, pock-marked landscape…a column of smoke rising on the horizon…and cockroaches, man, cockroaches everywhere!
- Homer J. Simpson - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 3:12 pm:
Chuck E. Cheese on the day they clean out the ball pit.
- Along 64 - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 3:13 pm:
The sun will be shining brightly knowing tomorrow Quinn and Company will go down in flames!
- Loop Lady - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 3:42 pm:
folks will be going tv free cuz their sick of the ads…Quinn will be purple in the face from exhaustion, the Baron keeps asking himself why he did it, lowest voter interest/turnout EVER…
- Skeptic - Friday, Aug 1, 14 @ 4:00 pm:
To paraphrase the anti-war movement…”What if they had an election and no one voted?”
By Nov 3, my head will just about explode at how much money was spent on this election. Imagine how many potholes could be filled, or mouths fed, or sports stadiums built, or mental health facilities operated, or books bought or … for all the money spent on the election. (Yet, suggest raising taxes by an equal amount and everyone goes ballistic.) Anyway, I’m with SoccerMom…wall-to-wall ads on TV, wall-to-wall signs on the roads. All for those two or three undecideds that are left. Man, I need a vacation, my Cynic-O-Meter(tm) just hit 11.
- Hilario - Thursday, Aug 14, 14 @ 9:05 pm:
Outstanding story there. What occurred after?
Thanks!