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Happy birthday, Gov. Rauner!
Thursday, Feb 18, 2016 - Posted by Rich Miller * I had a brief moment of levity with Gov. Rauner last night. I was at the Illinois Legislative Black Caucus’ annual dinner and saw an AFSCME lobbyist with a small green button. I asked if I could have it so I could give it to the governor, who was a few feet away…
Rauner laughed and said he’d never wear it but would add it to his collection and put it in his pocket. * So, at least I covered myself. Any other gift ideas? Humor only. No meanness, please…
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- The Muse - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:12 pm:
Free speech pronunciation lessons… The gift that keeps on givin’
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:13 pm:
I’d send “taste tested” Cannoli…
Happy Birthday, Governor.
Sincere best wishes,
OW
- hot chocolate - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:13 pm:
Reverse wheel of fortune - Buy a G
- Mittuns - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:14 pm:
A burned steak to go along with all of those bridges.
- Huh? - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:15 pm:
A jacket to wear for the devastation he is causing to the social safety net of Illinois.
- Ducky LaMoore - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:15 pm:
How about a new appointment book with half the lines pre-redacted?
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:16 pm:
A “newly” used looking Carhartt?
- Homer J. Quinn - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:17 pm:
a petition to recall the governor.
- Ferris Wheel - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:19 pm:
A map of the state with a card that reads “what do you give the man who has everything?”
- Decaff Coffee Party - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:19 pm:
A heart to go with his Carhartt
- Huh? - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:20 pm:
A merry go round music box that plays a dirge. On the drape/eave of theach merry go round, one side reads “Turn Around Agenda” on the other side it reads “What goes around, comes around”.
- Handle Bar Mustache - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:20 pm:
A refund from Hillary for the GTCR speech.
- Demoralized - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:20 pm:
A magic 8 ball. It could help with decision making.
- Cubs in '16 - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:20 pm:
Write the words “Turnaround Agenda” on a piece of paper, hand it to him, and say “Here’s your Turnaround Agenda Governor. Now can we please get a budget?”
- Anonymous - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:21 pm:
A Certificate of Accomplishment for the first Governor in memory to begin a new administration without serious accusations of partisan patronage in employment.
An unexpected and little recognized positive in these controversial times.
- Hyperbolic Chamber - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:22 pm:
(I was always told, ‘If you can’t say anything nice…”)
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:22 pm:
Selfie Stick?
- Huh? - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:22 pm:
Three more envelopes with messages that read “What now?”, “How long until I can get out of here?” And “What were you thinking?”
- Lucky Pierre - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:24 pm:
Happy birthday Goveror Rauner. The majority of a Illinois does not want the status quo. Keep pushing for reforms we need them
- Earnest - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:25 pm:
I wish him a sunny porch, a nice glass of wine and some time to relax with his dog. However, if he dozes off, it would amuse if someone were to give him an I Heart Mike tattoo.
- Huh? - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:26 pm:
Home school lessons on governin’, negotiatin’, and budgetin’.
- illini97 - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:26 pm:
I like the idea of a calendar/planner with a lock on it.
- out of touch - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:27 pm:
A calculator for addin’ and subtractin’, and a shiny new red fountain pen so that the reality of his non-budget doesn’t further escape him.
- out of touch - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:29 pm:
A Ron Sandack doll with a pull string that parrots “best speech ever, Governor”, “hang in there, Boss”, and “because Madigan” on a rotating basis.
- Annonin' - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:29 pm:
How about a new seat — next to Goldie — for $uper$tar Chip who is fresh back from destoryin’ the Rand Paul campaign?
- Stones - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:30 pm:
2016 Mercedes Van to replace the Trashcan Van. More befitting the CEO.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:31 pm:
Maybe 66 lil stuffed toy Owls… and a McCann campaign button?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:32 pm:
A slightly used copy of Governing for Dummies?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:32 pm:
An early retirement?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:32 pm:
60 votes in the House and 30 in the Senate?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:33 pm:
Better Superstars?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:33 pm:
$3.5 billion?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:34 pm:
A neck tie?
- Soccermom - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:34 pm:
Can you make the “no meanness” rule work both ways?
- for you a newspaper article - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:37 pm:
http://www.economist.com/blogs/democracyinamerica/2014/01/jerry-browns-stewardship
- Chemical_Riverside - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:37 pm:
ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg
- BBG - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:37 pm:
$1 (a 100% increase of his salary) so he can actually get to work on a real budget!
- out of touch - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:39 pm:
Dunkin’s fedora.
- Wensicia - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:42 pm:
Special Olympics T-shirt and a donation made in Rauner’s name.
- Not quite a majority - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:45 pm:
A big box of ‘g’s — enough for the next 12 months, at least.
- ILPundit - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:46 pm:
A copy of the Official Guide to Illinois Government, in hopes he might learn something about how a bill becomes a law:
https://www.cyberdriveillinois.com/publications/handbook/home.html
- Gruntled University Employee - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:47 pm:
A cell between Blago and Ryan.
- 360 Degree TurnAround - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:47 pm:
How about an iron for his pants!
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:49 pm:
A friend for Ken Dunkin?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:49 pm:
A 1st edition of Mostly Good and Competent Men: Illinois Governors from 1818 to 1988.
- AC - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:49 pm:
The Microsoft Excel Bible, or simply a copy of The Bible.
- northsider (the original) - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:50 pm:
The letter G.
- Name Withheld - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:50 pm:
Madigan and Cullerton salt-n-pepper shakers.
- A Jack - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:50 pm:
A time machine so he can tell his past self not to paint himself in a corner.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:52 pm:
“Pat Quinn for Governor”?
- Elliott Ness - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:52 pm:
A dash of humility, serving of humble pie, better advisors with some political acumen, REAL superstars, and dinner with Dan Proft and Joe Walsh. Probably forgettin something.
- No Longer A Lurker - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:53 pm:
A new flannel shirt.
- El Conquistador - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 3:58 pm:
Your life is relatively short. Karma knows no bounds. Enjoy your time on planet Earrh.
- Juvenal - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:00 pm:
I heard Boston Mayor Marty Walsh was giving Rauner a key to the city as his way of saying thanks for his public service.
- Anonymous - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:01 pm:
Support for your efforts, to make Illinois a better place to live!
- AC - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:02 pm:
A several month old package sent from Rauner to Emanuel marked “Return to Sender”
- Mr. Smith - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:03 pm:
A copy of “How To Win Friends and Influence People”.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:03 pm:
He has a statewide radio network, now, he has a Chicago newspaper, maybe a statewide TV network?
- A guy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:03 pm:
Give certificate to Earl Schieb. For any car.
- Team Sleep - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:04 pm:
He should pay it forward on his birthday and lend his top GTCR accountants and bookkeepers to Senator McCann and Auditor General Mautino.
- Diogenes in DuPage - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:07 pm:
Champagne wishes and caviar dreams!
- Gruntled University Employee - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:11 pm:
An actual nickname for posting on this blog instead of Anonymous.
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:12 pm:
HBO - “Dad’s Home State” - Season 2, Episode 20
Bruce celebrates his birthday morning with a breakfast at Charlie Parker’s, forgets to take selfies. Diana meets with her Chief of Staff to discuss birthday gift ideas, Goldberg writes a three page note to wish Bruce a Happy Birthday, decides not to send it. Lance tweets pictures of Illinois birthday cake ideas to the Cake Boss, “ck” emails to Mike Schrimpf’s birthday wishes to Bruce. Comedy, 72 minutes.
- Chicago 20 - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:16 pm:
The honor of playing Mr. Burns in the live stage production of “The Simpsons”.
- Vote - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:18 pm:
Free app for droppin’ g’s on his fill-in-the-blank
phone.
- Angry Chicagoan - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:28 pm:
A course in basic macroeconomics from an economics department in a social sciences division rather than a business school.
- Not it - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:29 pm:
Every dog owner always appreciates dog toys or treats.
- A Jack - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:36 pm:
A pet snake named Squeezy.
- Dance Band on the Titanic - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:37 pm:
A three year subscription to the Apple of the Day Club. Each shiny red apple to be freshly delivered daily at noon.
- A Jack - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:42 pm:
A hug from Rich.
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:50 pm:
Bill Buckner’s autograph on a Sangamo Club napkin?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:50 pm:
Bill Buckner?
- 47th Ward - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:53 pm:
The Sangamo Club?
- Rabid - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:54 pm:
Pack of koolaid
- Oswego Willy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:56 pm:
Portillo’s Strawberry Shake?
- JS Mill - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 4:59 pm:
He is our Governor, a job that I would never ever want.
How about just having a great Birthday!
- Anonymous - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 5:00 pm:
Happy Birthday, Gov. Rauner.
I’m my parents’ son. I’d love to tell you about them and their contemporaries and the world their generation built.
I think, you must agree, that you scored pretty, pretty, pretty, well, based on how they left it for you.
Just a quick note before you enjoy your day:
Leave it better than you found it. That’s what it’s all about.
- Rabid - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 5:01 pm:
Disappearing red ink
- 13TH - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 5:22 pm:
How to present and pass a budget book for Dummies 101
- Rabid - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 5:31 pm:
Lotto ticket
- West Sider - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 5:31 pm:
To go with the union button, a bumper sticker: “My Kid and My Tax Dollars go to New Trier”
- AJ_yooper - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 5:32 pm:
Some Dunkin D’s
- Stumpy's bunker - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 5:39 pm:
Classic elephant GOP pin.
Top panel over elephant: “Can you believe…”
Panel under elephant: “I bought it”.
- Anonymous - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 6:05 pm:
4 bobbleheads: Dunkin, Durkin, Radogno, and Sandack.
With just a touch from Rauner they all nod in agreement.
- dd - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 6:26 pm:
a half empty can of stag
- Arthur Andersen - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 6:32 pm:
A sign for the office-
“All calculatin’ reviewed by Arthur Andersen”
- PENSIONS ARE OFF LIMITS - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 6:38 pm:
Maybe just a neck tie?
- sal-says - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 6:42 pm:
Oh, please. Just another freakin’ joke.
>>>
OR RESIGN.
- sal-says - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 6:43 pm:
try 2:
Oh, please. Just another ck joke.
# GO.DO.YOUR.JOB. #
OR RESIGN.
- Mouthy - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 7:32 pm:
Dunkin bobble head doll bank. You put money in the slot between the ears and it’s head turns around and says “compromise”
- XDNR - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 7:36 pm:
A gift card for a psycho-analytical speech therapist.
- Rabid - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 7:52 pm:
Liquor cabinet
- Enviro - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 8:25 pm:
Honorary Union Membership Card
- burbanite - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 8:38 pm:
A donation in his name to the Illinois State Museum.
- Scarecrow - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 8:45 pm:
Lyrics from his favorite song:
I could while away the hours
Conferrin’ with the flowers
Consultin’ with the rain
And my head, I’d be scratchin’
While my thoughts were busy hatchin’
If I only had a brain
I’d unravel every riddle
For any individ’al
In trouble or in pain
- PENSIONS ARE OFF LIMITS - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 9:35 pm:
A donation has been your name to…..
- Gordon Willis - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 9:54 pm:
A new shine box….so Billy Batts can call him “spit shine Brucie”….make your shoes look like mirras’
- Keyrock - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 10:22 pm:
Genuine Magic Beans.
- Sick of It All - Thursday, Feb 18, 16 @ 11:46 pm:
Lunch with Roberta Lynch
- Jorge - Friday, Feb 19, 16 @ 12:00 am:
This proves Nationwide isn’t on your side and chicken parm don’t taste so good. Omaha!
- Rabid - Friday, Feb 19, 16 @ 5:41 am:
Flip flops
- Rabid - Friday, Feb 19, 16 @ 6:02 am:
Reinforced backside work pants
- Robert the 1st - Friday, Feb 19, 16 @ 8:07 am:
A large cake with “Thank You!” on it from all the non-AFSCME, non-trial lawyer, non-lobbyist, taxpayers in the state. (Everyone but the posters here, really).
- Rabid - Friday, Feb 19, 16 @ 8:20 am:
Work boots
- Rabid - Friday, Feb 19, 16 @ 8:25 am:
Day bed
- A Citizen - Friday, Feb 19, 16 @ 9:59 am:
Resignation letter signed by madagin and Notarized.