Excuse me millenials, I know that we are here to drink and have a good time. I’m glad you aren’t drinking a cola. I was put on earth to solve pensions, and cola’s are so bad, I tried to rid the state of them.
Let me tell you about my plan for Chicago. The first requirement is making the will of the people the law of the land. The second requirement is everybody in, nobody out. The third requirement is I will work night and day. The fourth requirement is that I was put on earth to turn around Chicago. Fifth…oh look, a squirrel!
“Hello, it’s me.
I was wondering if after all these years you’d like to meet
To go over 2014. They say that time’s supposed to heal ya, but I ain’t done much healing
Hello, can you hear me?
I’m in Cook County dreaming about what Illinois used to be
When I was governor,
I’ve forgotten how it felt before Rauner swept us all away.
There’s such a difference between us
And 926 days.
Hello from the North Side.
I must have called a thousand times
To tell you I’m sorry for everything that I’ve done
But when I call you never seem to be home
Hello from the outside
At least I can say that I’ve tried
To tell you I’m sorry for losing in 2014.
And it matters. it clearly tears you apart over SB1.”